Not Sure What To Do With This Girl (Long, Please Read)

[searock]

They are used commonly when someone to express how obnoxious someone is. They started off as epithets for women, but through common usage have come to be used more colloquially.

They haven't lost their original meaning of "female/feminine", though (e.g. it's not like the term "bastard", that now is basically completely unrelated to its original meaning, when used as an insult). It's insulting to call a man a "girl" or other synonyms for "girl", and the only reason for which it is is sexism. It's also the same reason for which some people are homophobic - they can't stand the idea of men being "feminine". When people are homophobic towards lesbians, it's generally because they can't stand the idea that a woman would not be attracted to men, the "center of the universe". The most common questions that lesbian women get asked by straight people are "don't you need a man in your life?" "how can you have sex without a man?" "what did men do to you to make you become a lesbian", and so on. As kids, it's ok for a girl to dress like a boy and play with "boy's toys", but the opposite is generally frowned upon and from a very young age boys are shamed and made fun of if they show "feminine" traits. The list goes on and on.

I don't think it's pointless or harmful to try to draw a corollary with another's experience in order to gain insight into your own. To take another's word as gospel wouldn't be smart, but then again, that's why he didn't ask "why did this girl do this?". He knew that nobody could know what she was thinking so he tried to aggregate other stories and take a stab at why.

If he had asked "Why does this woman do this?", he would have gotten replies that said "We cannot possibly know why (because we don't know her), but maybe it's because...". Which is what (I think) he wanted. There was no need to use that phrasing. It was an honest mistake, it's all good.

[BackUpOrGetStng]

Bastard still means what it used to mean, and these other words are on there way to achieving what "bastard" has achieved. It's insulting for women to be considered butch, bulldyke, hoss, and she-male..referring to women having masculine traits.

He probably would have gotten replies like what you suggested, but it would appear he already knew that "we cannot possibly know", so he asked a general question. What he wanted to know and how he phrased it was completely valid. He wanted a general answer(s). You are the definition of a whiny cunt if you somehow took offense to his wording, or thought someone would.

[BackUpOrGetStng]

Why do you think there are Ask a Male/Female forums here?!?!

[searock]

Bastard still means what it used to mean

When you insult someone using the term "bastard", you aren't implying that they are an illegitimate child (that is why I specified that the term bastard is basically completely unrelated to its original meaning when used as an insult). When you insult someone using terms like "girl" or "cunt" and so forth, you are implying that they have traits that are considered (erroneously of course) "typically feminine". For example, you might use the term "pussy" to denote lack of courage, and so on.

It's insulting for women to be considered butch, bulldyke, hoss, and she-male..referring to women having masculine traits.

I already explained the difference.

[searock]

He probably would have gotten replies like what you suggested, but it would appear he already knew that "we cannot possibly know", so he asked a general question. What he wanted to know and how he phrased it was completely valid. He wanted a general answer(s). You are the definition of a whiny cunt if you somehow took offense to his wording, or thought someone would.

Insulting me (or trying to) is not going to change my mind. He used a phrase that is commonly used to mean "why do ALL women do this", which is a generalization, which is wrong. I simply pointed it out. Really, it was over a week ago or something.

[BackUpOrGetStng]

You explained what you perceive as a difference. However, I think that calling a man a pussy or a woman a bulldyke are equally insulting. Agree to disagree I guess.

You are correct about bastard. Through common usage, it's meaning has evolved, as these other words have and are evolving. I'm just doing my part to push progress.

[Starnique]

In my opinion telling a girl to suck your cock with the intent to be mean is very disrespectful. Since I was dancing at one point, I have been called bitch, ho, slut and I know they thought I got around but I didn't really care because you can call me whatever and it dont matter because I know who I am. However, if a guy I was going at it with told me to suck their dick, I'd **** him up seriously. Its just disrespectful.

I remember my freshman year of college, this guy said that to me. He liked me and on Valentines day, he got me a bunch of flowers and candy and shit and I guess he thought I tried to play him and we was at this club and we got imt it real bad and he was like, stfu...suck my dick and everybody was like ooh. I felt beyond played and I couldn't argue with him after that, all I remember is flipping completely out on him. I can be wild and the girls I was with couldn't tame me and security dudes picked me up and carried me out screaming and trying to get him. Then he stood there just smirking, talking about. What she gonna do? Let her ass go. I blacked out. I was hitting them guards and everything cause I wanted his ass.

Anyway, its disrespectful. A major insult to me which I guess proves y'all point of how liberated you'd feel. Anyway carry on.

[BackUpOrGetStng]

Insulting me (or trying to) is not going to change my mind. He used a phrase that is commonly used to mean "why do ALL women do this", which is a generalization, which is wrong. I simply pointed it out. Really, it was over a week ago or something.

You brought it up.

You are correct, that the phrase is used incorrectly to ask that question, but for what he wanted, he used the perfect wording.

[searock]

You explained what you perceive as a difference.

Just consider this: the terms that mean "feminine" are considered insults both when they are used against males and when they are used against females. This clearly means that it's not the "being called something you're not" part that is insulting, it is the "being called feminine" part that is.

When you call a woman "dyke" or something like that, it isn't insulting because being masculine is per se an insult: you are insulting her because she, who is "supposed" to be feminine, is masculine. When you insult a guy for being feminine, you are insulting him because he is "supposed" to be masculine AND because being feminine is per se something bad.

The whole part about being "supposed" to be masculine/feminine is part of sexism, but I'm too tired to go into it right now (there are plenty of articles online if you're interested).

[searock]

You feel the need to specify "some women", every ****ing time a say "women", no matter how obvious it is that I don't mean all women.

You brought it up.

I still think the wording was wrong, when put in the context of general usage of the phrase. He should have said "Why does this woman do this?". He would have gotten the answers that he was looking for, and it wouldn't have been open to more than one interpretation.

[BackUpOrGetStng]

Words can't express how not interested I am in reading your articles.

You have a point about female insults being used against both sexes, but I don't care what you say, telling a female she has masculine traits is not going to make her feel good, and it's not because of society and the media either. It's because women don't like having broad shoulders and facial hair, etc. Saying someone doesn't have feature typical of their gender is not sexist. Treating someone differently because of their gender is sexist.

[BackUpOrGetStng]

You brought it up.

I still think the wording was wrong, when put in the context of general usage of the phrase. He should have said "Why does this woman do this?". He would have gotten the answers that he was looking for, and it wouldn't have been open to more than one interpretation.

Yes, that was a general statement as you have done it several times, and not only to me. You are the one who brought that specific time up.

He should not have said "Why did this woman do this?". He wanted general answers. Why the **** do you think there are forums called Ask a Male and Ask a Female? It's so people can get general answers.

[searock]

Words can't express how not interested I am in reading your articles.

They're not mine, and it's sad that you are uninterested in problems of our society. Many privileged people feel uncomfortable when their privilege is pointed out to them, and they (we) react sometimes with irritation and lack of interest, as if it were something unimportant.

You have a point about female insults being used against both sexes, but I don't care what you say, telling a female she has masculine traits is not going to going to make her feel good

Not the point I was making.

Saying someone doesn't have feature typical of their gender is not sexist.

I never said it was.

The point I'm making is that terms that mean "feminine" are used as insults because "femininity" is considered to be per se a negative thing.

[searock]

Bullshit. Most recently, some sap was spouting off about one single, specific chick that was treating him a certain way and asked "why do women do this?" It was extremely clear to me, he did not mean all women.

Again: it was you who brought it up.

[BackUpOrGetStng]

Again: it was you who brought it up.

Again, I was making a general statement, and you made it more specific by pointing out, it's only when you think it could be misinterpreted. The instance I brought up is the only time I've seen you use that verbage, so I drew the link.

Feminine insults are insulting to men, because femininity in men is negative, per se...as is the reverse. Is that sexism? Possibly.

Sorry, but I have no interest in the insults people use. Am I for fair pay, and fair everything else? Yes, and will gladly support any legislation that works to ensure that.