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Thread: I broke up with her and feel horrible..

  1. #1
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    I broke up with her and feel horrible..

    Me and my now ex gf were together a little over 4 months. It started out great. Awesome actually, we spent the entire first month together. Felt too good to be true.. well a month in a secret about her came out, she ha sbi-polar disorder.. so she changed and would boss me around, call me names, it was ridiculous how she justified it. her own best friend asked why I was with her.. But I felt like I was falling in love with her..

    Her crazy mood swings were intense, she even peppered sprayed me because I tried to stand up for myself in an argument. It wasnt self defense because i've never hit a person in my life. I get along with almost everyone. but I still took her back. a few weeks ago I made a mistake and cheated on her.. it was eating me alive because all of a sudden she actually started treating me like a human being.

    She's been pushing her religion on me and i was ok with exploring that route but after she grilled me today about it, i just couldnt take it anymore and I broke up with her. Its been 4 hours and im crushed.. In the end there was more bad then good but why do I feel this way?

    not going to rant so i'll stop there, should I consider giving her another chance? I dont think either one of us deserves each other especially after her pepper spraying me, then me cheating.. but this pain is so real... any advice would be awesome, thanks guys

  2. #2
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    If you even consider giving her another chance then I suggest you seek councelling to find out why you want to be with an abusive cow that you've only known for four measly months and in that very, very short time she has shown you what a c**t she actually is.

    Go find a decent woman (not another person that will cheat with you) and get YOURself on the straight and narrow before what you did and who you pick becomes a sick habit YOU can't break.
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

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    Should you give her another chance? Sometimes we in Europe joke that Americans are retarded. Might our joke have some basis in reality? Based on your question I'm beginning to wonder.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Boisdevie View Post
    Should you give her another chance? Sometimes we in Europe joke that Americans are retarded. Might our joke have some basis in reality? Based on your question I'm beginning to wonder.
    You don't have to bring my intelligence into the conversation, love is blind and obviously has an impact on a persons thought process when you're the one in it. Regardless I get what both of you are saying and I appreciate the help. It's not an easy thing to do when someone lets their feelings do the thinking for them. And apparently that's the situation that I'm in. So again thank you for bringing me back down to earth a little bit.

    I should also add there is the possibility that she is pregnant. That wont alter my decision because I won't remain unhappy in a relationship just for the child. I'm obviously going to be involved in every aspect of my child's life if she is.
    Last edited by bad_wolf; 18-11-13 at 12:12 PM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by bad_wolf View Post
    I should also add there is the possibility that she is pregnant.
    This story just gets better and better. Can't wait for the next instalment.

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    You can't help who you fall for.

    But this relationship sounds like nothing but trouble to me.

    Unless she's willing to change, and I don't know anything about bi-polar disorder, you're both better off away from each other.

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    It's normal to feel bad; she may have been a bitch but you cared about her and that's all there is to it. Totally okay.

    So, now ask yourself - did you do the right thing? I'd say yes. She pepper sprayed you for having an opinion. She was forcing you to join her religion. I'd guessing you walked on egg shells more often than not, always anticipating her next outburst. She needs help - not from you, from a professional.

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    Jezzzzus, the shite I read here sometimes makes me wanna puke.

    Yes, you certainly can help who you fall for. Dont' "care to the point of getting yourself emotionally hooked on a basket case" Love YOU enough to pace yourself and not give all of you until she/or he has shown you in actions that they are worth your love. WTF.

    You can do that by not becoming vulnerable to someone you barely fking know, Four months and he's in like flint and a possible baby on the way. Where were the rubbers, where was the proof she was on some form of BC? Where was the proof she is good relationship material, even sane for that matter?

    Op, Dude: Don't believe a word this sick little calf is telling you and do not take any responsibility for a child (if it turns out she's not lying about being pregnant) until after you've had a parternity test done. If she's incapable of caring for a child (which it sounds like she is) and it turns out the child is yours then seek full custody so your child doesn't have to be subjected to her particular brand of crazy.

    Regardless I get what both of you are saying and I appreciate the help. It's not an easy thing to do when someone lets their feelings do the thinking for them. And apparently that's the situation that I'm in. So again thank you for bringing me back down to earth a little bit.
    You are welcome. Pls, for your own sake learn from this. Keep both your dong and your emotions wrapped up until its proven to you in actions that the girl you are finding interesting is sane and good relationship material. This one is neither.

    mmmmmm'kay?
    Last edited by Wakeup; 20-11-13 at 11:54 AM.
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

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    Quote Originally Posted by Wakeup View Post
    Jezzzzus, the shite I read here sometimes makes me wanna puke.

    Yes, you certainly can help who you fall for. Dont' "care to the point of getting yourself emotionally hooked on a basket case" Love YOU enough to pace yourself and not give all of you until she/or he has shown you in actions that they are worth your love. WTF.

    You can do that by not becoming vulnerable to someone you barely fking know, Four months and he's in like flint and a possible baby on the way. Where were the rubbers, where was the proof she was on some form of BC? Where was the proof she is good relationship material, even sane for that matter?

    Op, Dude: Don't believe a word this sick little calf is telling you and do not take any responsibility for a child (if it turns out she's not lying about being pregnant) until after you've had a parternity test done. If she's incapable of caring for a child (which it sounds like she is) and it turns out the child is yours then seek full custody so your child doesn't have to be subjected to her particular brand of crazy.

    You are welcome. Pls, for your own sake learn from this. Keep both your dong and your emotions wrapped up until its proven to you in actions that the girl you are finding interesting is sane and good relationship material. This one is neither.

    mmmmmm'kay?
    Out of all the advice I've gotten this post pretty much opened my eyes more then anything else, well said. I have some issues I need to clearly get control of.

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    All relationships are good the first month. You have already cheated on her and absolutely ruined the trust.

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    "Love is blind" is just a pathetic excuse for dysfunctional people to stay in dysfunctional relationships. It makes me sick when i hear that phrase. Love doesnt make you blind. Your own low self esteem and fear of being alone forces you to ignore the obvious red flags.. the girl is mentally ill. Her behaviour is ouf of her control. BD is a complicated illness and i suggest you just walk away and dont look back. She has not yet balanced her meds and is not coping with the illness and is not emotionally stable enough for any sort of relationship. And you are not strong enough to cope with her coz four months in-you took the easy option and cheated instead of just walking away. You both have issues. Hers are too big for you to handle so dont even try. She needs to do that on her own. You need to be alone too, boost your self esteem and then figure out what you really want b4 settling for second best again

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