some hints that some1 isn't into you and don't want to date you or want to breakup?

[Exeter19]

i'll start with :
they don't answer or return your phone calls.

[IndiReloaded]

Are you talking about someone you just met? Or a BF/GF (re: breakup).

I've had times I didn't return a partner's call. I simply didn't feel like talking, not just to him but to *anyone*. Sometimes, when one knows one will be miserable on the phone, it's better not to have the conversation. In fact, I like to think I'm being respectful of the other persons's feelings by not dragging them down with mine (especially since such moods tend to pass quickly).

[Exeter19]

i guess both, someone you are into and wonder if they are as into you and hints that would red flag they aren't, and with a bf/gf who falls out of love with you but won't tell you, hints to look for because they don't have the guts to be honest with you. thx

so if you know someone is upset with you , you won't take a call to spare yourself the headache but it doesn't mean you don't like the person, just means you don't want to deal with the situation? what if they leave a vm and it is nice?

: i also think if you go to kiss someone and they turn away, is a BIG sign they aren't feeling you the same way.

[IndiReloaded]

so if you know someone is upset with you , you won't take a call to spare yourself the headache but it doesn't mean you don't like the person, just means you don't want to deal with the situation? what if they leave a vm and it is nice?

: i also think if you go to kiss someone and they turn away, is a BIG sign they aren't feeling you the same way.

First, don't take my N of 1 as rule. I'm a bit non-standard based on what seems to be 'norm'.

But to be clear about my POV - If I am upset, I will spare *my partner* the emotional vomit, especially if I know he's having an awesome day. Negativity sucks, especially if one is feeling good. Once the immediacy of whatever happened has passed, I will go to him to experience his cheer which helps make me feel better. Then I will tell him my beef if it is serious enough. Unless it is very serious of course, in which case I would share immediately whatever the issue is.

I agree about the turning away from kisses although that can be very contextual. If I'm feeling playful I sometimes turn away to make him chase me a bit. I suppose it depends how someone turns away. In my case, I might turn my head, but I never leave his arms. Someone who turns from a kiss and walks off is being hurtful, IMO.

[joanna1]

I think a hint is they ignore you if they see you when out with friends.

[Exeter19]

First, don't take my N of 1 as rule. I'm a bit non-standard based on what seems to be 'norm'.

But to be clear about my POV - If I am upset, I will spare *my partner* the emotional vomit, especially if I know he's having an awesome day. Negativity sucks, especially if one is feeling good. Once the immediacy of whatever happened has passed, I will go to him to experience his cheer which helps make me feel better. Then I will tell him my beef if it is serious enough. Unless it is very serious of course, in which case I would share immediately whatever the issue is.

I agree about the turning away from kisses although that can be very contextual. If I'm feeling playful I sometimes turn away to make him chase me a bit. I suppose it depends how someone turns away. In my case, I might turn my head, but I never leave his arms. Someone who turns from a kiss and walks off is being hurtful, IMO.

i understand, you love them and don't want to drag them into your bad mood or vibe and you keep to yourself out of respect. i think most just unload to feel better, i know i am guilty of unloading. this is where communicating and understanding each other when in a relationship is so imp.

i have got the turn away, or the cheek and you know right then and there and your heart sinks. it feels like shit, but least you know for sure what they don't feel. i have had some squirm away and it is hurtful. you get clues they like you and might be recepetive and then you go in for the kiss & pow, so wrong!

[Exeter19]

I think a hint is they ignore you if they see you when out with friends.

yes, that is a big clue that that person isn't into you, or might even be embarrassed to have their friends see them talking to you. to me that says they aren't even much of a friend.

[Jffs24]

If they always shitkick and laugh at you in front of others with you or in private -- if you can't see the good in someone you aren't into them.

[joanna1]

yes, that is a big clue that that person isn't into you, or might even be embarrassed to have their friends see them talking to you. to me that says they aren't even much of a friend.

I agree. One of the first boys I ever dated was that way with me and his friends and even his family. I never understood why, but it made me very self conscious.

[fearoflove]

Never initiates conversations or ask you to hang out
Don't pay for dates even though they can afford to
Stood you up for no good reasons
Tells you they don't like you, not right for each other, don't want a bf/gf right now, too busy to date, or other excuses not to date or commit
Don't show physical affection
Don't want to show you off to their friends, parents, other people
Don't spend time or very little time with you
Cancel plans with you often

[YoungCosmo]

^sounds like the dude has had some real dating woes..

[fearoflove]

^sounds like the dude has had some real dating woes..

Some of them were my personal experience from when I was young and naive (and just wasn't as attractive as I am now) and other ones were just things I would do to guys I wasn't into.

[YoungCosmo]

I doubt you've ever been attractive in your life. Hence, you troll for a living.

[Exeter19]

If they always shitkick and laugh at you in front of others with you or in private -- if you can't see the good in someone you aren't into them.

yeah, that's true. embarrassing someone to get laugh shows lack of respect for that person if dating or a friend. & if that person isn't in on the joke and made the butt of it.

[Exeter19]

Never initiates conversations or ask you to hang out
Don't pay for dates even though they can afford to
Stood you up for no good reasons
Tells you they don't like you, not right for each other, don't want a bf/gf right now, too busy to date, or other excuses not to date or commit
Don't show physical affection
Don't want to show you off to their friends, parents, other people
Don't spend time or very little time with you
Cancel plans with you often

i agree with all you listed. not paying for dates says we aren't a couple and i won't see you as a perspective one. just buddies.
no pda is a big clue. not even an arm around, a kiss on cheek, holding hand, nothing says not attracted to.