Here's a complicated one for you. 10 years ago I was with a guy for a year, anyway, he stopped all contact with me and I later found out he was 'seeing' a number of other women.*
Fast forward to 4 months ago, he got in touch via my old email address saying how bad he felt that he'd hurt me and he wanted to stay in touch as friends. I agreed and soon we were speaking every day. I am now married, but with lots of problems with my marriage, which I know will end in divorce. I knew deep down that I couldn't trust this man when he got back in touch, but we agreed to meet for dinner as friends. We had a wonderful time, we share so many things in common. The next day he emailed me telling me he still loved me and wanted to be with me, I felt the same, I fell in love with him all over again.*
We had a few more dates, one of which resulted in sex in his car. Then the emails and contact became daily, to the point where we were talking on the phone for hours at a time.*
Something always seemed strange about the situation though, he could only ever see me at the very last minute (nothing ever arranged in advance). He also would never speak to me on the phone in the evening or during the weekend, I questioned him about this, believing he must be living with a girlfriend or wife. He denied it and just kept reiterating how he promised me he would always be honest with me after what happened before, he just said he found it difficult to speak to me because he missed me so much??
We finally arranged a weekend away in Paris, which was blissful. We both said that we couldn't be apart after a perfect weekend together and started making plans to be together.*
I was eager to arrange another break away and he stated this time it would have to be during the week and he would arrange time off work. So we agreed a date. As it got closer to the date I asked if he'd arranged for somewhere to stay or did he want me to do it. He just said to wait as he had not had the holiday approved and once it was he would book a hotel, every time I asked he said he would chase it. I got so tired of asking in the end I just gave up and didn't mention it again and I was very upset, but did not tell him. Since then we've had 2 other meetings arranged which he has cancelled at the last minute due to something out of his control coming up.*
I know there is something not right here, but he calls me and emails me several times a day telling me how much he loves me and how excited he is about our future. What ate his motives? I've given him plenty of opportunities to get out of this, he knows he can finish it and walk away, but he choses not to. What's going on in his head?
I'm not proud of cheating on my husband and I have been separated from him for a year.