Should I tell her I love her?

[aalexan1]

So I stupidly broke up with a girl two months ago, for a stupid reason.

She started dating someone else.

I realized the reason was stupid.

She gave me another chance to get her back (let me come over, cuddled and made out with me, looked me in the eyes and asked what I was thinking - I think she wanted me to tell her I loved her, which I have never done). We looked into each other's eyes and had a "moment". I didn't tell her I loved her, I got needy and pushy.

A couple days later, she told me that maybe we shouldn't talk for a bit, when I was pushing.

She's still posting on my FB and doesn't want to lose contact completely it seems.

I realized I do, for sure, love her, but it seems at this point it'd just be twisting an old wound, for me and her - is there any reason to tell her I love her? I'm pretty sure she loved me - she made comments in the past about how I must not say that easily.

I also want to point out we haven't talked for 3 weeks, and she's on a trip to visit the guy's family, so it may already be too far gone.

[HeartIsAching]

Move before it's too late. Say "I made a mistake. I realize I love you. I want another chance."

If she says "No", don't go all stalker on her. Cut contact and move on.

What've you got to lose?

[UnderTheMoon]

She started dating someone else.


I think the moment and chance has done passed you by my friend, and I don't mean to be blunt, but here it is, just move on. If you felt this way, you shouldn't have broke up, no matter how stupid the reason is. When you find someone you really love it will be different. The fact is, now you are getting into an area no one likes to be in, and in this area there is always a lot of drama. So avoid it. Sorry though that it went the way it did. I would also be a little concerned that she can easily date someone else, then give you the opportunity so quickly? Seems a little shifty.

[aalexan1]

Well, I don't believe they're official yet?

[UnderTheMoon]

Well, I don't believe they're official yet?

Still, she was already in the process of moving on. People that linger, tend to not know what they want. NOT always the case, but it is most of the time.

I would feel more comfortable going for it, if I knew the other person hadn't already tried meeting other people and was close if not already dating someone else. Up to you though, if you find yourself in a hot mess well, then you know for sure.

Good luck no matter what you do.

[smackie9]

You broke up for a reason so stick with that because if you BOTH truly were in love each other there would have been no breakup and she wouldn't want to be dating anyone but you. She is just in love with the idea of being in love. It's best to just move on.

[michelle23]

Dude if you really want her back just say you love her and realize now you have been a tool and your sorry. I think everyone deserves a second chance as long as they are not a db or a liar, a cheat, a woman beater etc.. You sound young and its easy to make stupid decisions when you are learning about love.. if you were 30-I would tell you to leave her alone you big loser but if your like 18... different story..

Anyway you have nothing to lose by just telling her how you feel and asking for another chance. If she says no, move on..

[UnderTheMoon]

Dude if you really want her back just say you love her and realize now you have been a tool and your sorry. I think everyone deserves a second chance as long as they are not a db or a liar, a cheat, a woman beater etc.. You sound young and its easy to make stupid decisions when you are learning about love.. if you were 30-I would tell you to leave her alone you big loser but if your like 18... different story..

Anyway you have nothing to lose by just telling her how you feel and asking for another chance. If she says no, move on..

he said she was already seeing someone else. Official or not don't you think that's a little shifty? I would wonder about that.

[michelle23]

he said she was already seeing someone else. Official or not don't you think that's a little shifty? I would wonder about that.

If they are only seeing each other a couple of weeks and its not serious and its not official or exclusive-then technically by american standards in the dating world he wouldnt be doing anything wrong...

The chances of this new guy being a rebound are high. She may feel the exact same about OP.

And its not much different than someone walking up to her on the street and asking her out.. If she is taken and serious about the new guy, she will say no

[UnderTheMoon]

Well there you go. Go for it. If it ends badly, then well, at least you tried.

[smackie9]

Waste of time.....I agree with Underthemoon, it's been 2 months....opportunity has long passed. I can see her saying "too late" and rub it in your face.

[michelle23]

I can see the same thing happening but if he wants to tell the girl he loves her and that is what it takes to find closure and move on then who are we to stop him? At least he will know he didn't give up without trying and without saying those things that he wanted to say.

[Wakeup]

Waste of time.....I agree with Underthemoon, it's been 2 months....opportunity has long passed. I can see her saying "too late" and rub it in your face.

I agree with ^^^ that.

OP: If you actually loved her then you would have told her that without digging in your heals. She gave you another chance and sub consciously you didn't want it. Heed your gut man.

Let her go and consciously stop thinking about her and getting back with her and soon enough you'll become indifferent to her and whatever she's doing with anyone else.

She was NOT meant to be your LIFEmate. If she was, you'd still be with her so there is no need to regret so stop your OCD thinking on this so that you can get on with finding someone more suitable for you that saying "I love you" to comes easy.

[smackie9]

Anyone see this? " So I stupidly broke up with a girl two months ago, for a stupid reason.
"She started dating someone else."

"I realized the reason was stupid".

The key factor here is she gets a new guy and THEN he realizes he made a mistake and loves her?...he just can't stand the fact she is with someone else that is all.

[Wakeup]

True dat, Smackie.