Rejection

[sundaygirl]

So my question is why do men completely disconnect with women who rejected them?
Why don't they think that if they stay connected there might be a chance that she changes her mind? Or what do they think when the person who rejected them tries to talk to them?
Thank you !!!!!!

[VincenzoG91]

Some guys aren't like that at all. They obsess over an ex for weeks, months, even years after the breakup.

Some guys who get dumped will go No Contact as part of a strategy to win the girl back. They figure that if they totally ignore her after the breakup, she will start to miss them more and more until she finally wants to get back together.

In general, guys tend to be raised to not be expressive about their emotions, except for happiness and anger. Some guys might completely disconnect after rejection so that they can keep their emotions under control.

[michelle23]

if a guy came here and said "she rejected me, what should I do" the only advice he would get is to move on and forget about her. Are you playing hard to get with a guy and it backfired? well tough s**t if you are. The next girl will no better and snap him up fast

[dem862]

Some men dont compromise. If a chick is too much of a hassle its time to move on to the next one.

[HDBadger]

Michelle is right. It sounds like you acted immaturely and got burned for it. Good for the guy for cutting you off.

You don't deserve him.

[searock]

Honestly I think that's the healthiest and most useful thing to do - to go no contact after he has been dumped or rejected. Anything else would just pointlessly prolong his agony.

Why do you ask? If you have changed your mind, tell him that you have changed your mind and want to go on a date with him.

[Lord Darkshire]

Guys are looking to get laid...why keep pokin at something if nothing is going to happen? It's a waste of energy. There's a lot of guys that don't want to spen their time fanning a girl's ego in hopes to get a possible crumb. I think it's a good thing...nothing worse than a guy that keeps badgering you to go out with them when you already have told them no don't you think? Move on and find for sure thing I say.

[basilandthyme]

They disconnect BECAUSE you're not interested. Why waste time on a person who's rejected you?

There's much better things to do in the world than chase someone who doesn't want you.

[sundaygirl]

Oh my god I got so much back fired thing, no I wasn't playing a hard to get at all, he seemed self centered and careless and I had too much life problems at that time. Later when things calmed down in my life I wanted to meet up with him but he ignored me that's all. I contacted him after like 3 months or 4 months but he didn't wanna talk back, he could at least say "hey how you've been" and etc but no completely ignored me >_< lol

[searock]

Oh my god I got so much back fired thing, no I wasn't playing a hard to get at all, he seemed self centered and careless and I had too much life problems at that time. Later when things calmed down in my life I wanted to meet up with him but he ignored me that's all. I contacted him after like 3 months or 4 months but he didn't wanna talk back, he could at least say "hey how you've been" and etc but no completely ignored me >_< lol

Why did you want to meet up with him, though? Unless you changed your mind about dating him (in which case, you should tell him asap), I still don't see why he would want to meet you. I think he's doing the right thing by not interacting with you anymore - not because of a back fire thing, but because it's the healthy way to do when you get rejected.

[michelle23]

3 or 4 months later. Prob has a gf by now..

[Archie]

I find it a little amusing.
When I just meet a girl who I know nothing about, but in the first couple of hours of us being together, if she rejects me, or I her - then there's no point in pursuing one another. I don't really know her and nor does she know me, so there's no loss.
But if it's a situation, where I know her for a while already and we have some or a lot in common, I see no reason to just cut all ties. Thing is, I already see that girl as a friend but at the same time I see her as someone more than a friend. If she rejects me, it's sad, but that does not change the fact that we had fun doing some activities together. The feeling of wanting her as someone more than a friend just fades away after a while.

Some guys may find it hard to disconnect that feeling of wanting to pursue someone they're interested in, so that's why they cut all ties, so that it would be easier for them to move on.

[Rowen]

Are you being serious? Honestly, OP, asking the guy to stick around after you shoot down any chance he's ever had with you is like ripping the head off his dog with a chainsaw right in front of him and then telling him he can still have it. Maybe I'm being a bit blunt here, but he's not going to stick around and give you the same level of attention as always because he believes you think there's nothing between you two. Sure, in time, you can be friends. But you have to give him that time to heal. And next go around it has to be you- not him- making the move to start it. You want to know why? Because most guys (notice not all but most) aren't going to eat glass twice after discovering its painful taste. Once bitten, twice shy- he'll respect you and feel as though the air is clear between the two of you and that you stand on firm ground. Guys have feelings too. Maybe they're not always shown, but they come out when they're hurt. For that reason, you can't just expect him to stay around after you rejected him- at least not right away. Everyone needs time to heal.

[sundaygirl]

oh god no I'm not asking him to stick around, first of let's say it's been 3 years since then, I have dated couple of guys and been in a relationships but he remained single for that entire time and we knew each other for at least 2 months before he cut the ties we had lots of fun together and he was calling me a homie lol, anyways I am the best that could happen to him so why not wait for me , no seriously though with his personality it is hard to imagine any normal girl would date him. I would tell him that I wanna go out with him, but the thing is if I say that first I'm afraid he'll be like well you want me not me want you and push his rules on me or something, you know I want him to initiate the meet up on his own, plus it was not an exact rejection, he didn't actually say he loved me or anything, he just said he wanted me to go out with him I didn't have a car, instead of saying he could take me he said I should take a bus which I didn't like, I was hoping he would offer me a ride since he was the one asking me out but that's why I said no, and the rest is a history

I wouldn't even mind may be initiating a date if he at least said hi to me, I can't just go a nd hey I wanna date with you let's go, first you greet and then start the conversation about the past etc

[basilandthyme]

Have you considered the idea that he may simply have lost any interest in you? I mean, you made the whole first date thing very complicated, so why would he bother again?