Does he really like me as more than a friend or was it 'just a kiss'?

[AshbeeQueen13]

Hi there, advice and opinions would be greatly appreciated !

I'll try to keep this short and sweet ..

My guy friend who I've known for a few years now kissed me on two separate occasions on nights out over the past five or six weeks. He works in the same building as me, but not in the same area, so I see him almost every day. Since I've known him, only in the last 6 months (coincidentally since I broke up with my ex) I have gotten to know him better and talk to him more. I've always really liked him as a person but never thought of him any other way, until the night he kissed me and we spent so much time together, now I'm kicking myself why I never saw him in this way before as he's perfect for me!

I initially thought that after our first kiss that things would be awkward between us at work the following day, but it wasn't, in fact, since our kisses, we've been speaking more than ever! But that's really just it, we're speaking more than ever, about every day things, chatting, joking, taking little walks to the shop (where we work), but nothing has been said about our kiss(es), not one word and it's eating away at me I just want to know what his reason for it was.

It's really frustrating because as you can probably tell, I really like this guy, and all I want is to know if he feels the same but I can't ask him I'm terrified of ruining what we have already.

Little signs that has shown me that yeah, maybe he does like me are: he always says hello, makes conversation, does me favours, gives me advice when I ask, and now he's told me personally that he's coming to my birthday party next month and that he "wouldn't miss it". But then I think, if he did like me, he would have asked me for my number or asked me out by now, right? I'm thinking maybe he's too shy and it was the liquid courage on those nights out that pushed him to make the move.. but then I think that's just me and wishful thinking. I've also recently found out that all of his colleagues in his area know about me and what happened between us so he's obviously talking about me!

I really don't know what to do it's driving me crazy because every day I see him, I fall deeper for the guy, I'm getting butterflies just thinking about him. Do you think maybe he's shy? Or am I just some girl he can kiss when he's out drinking and he's bragging about it to his colleagues? I'm hoping he's shy because he's so genuine to my face that I'd hate to think it was the latter.. Any tips maybe on how I could bring it up in conversation or give him the push to ask me out? I just don't know how he feels !!

Thank you

[Emereldess]

Psst - do you know if he does lots of picture messaging on his phone? Does he ever show you any photos? A really inconspicuous way to get his number (tip from experience lol) is to see a photo and just all around gush on it and say "Oh my god, can you send that to me? I LOVE it!" and thus: "Sure! But... I don't have your number.." upon which you can happily offer him your phone number, he can text you the picture, and then the talking can really begin!

My opinion from reading your story is that yes he likes you and yes he is very shy, both of you have not talked about the kiss(es) and therefore both of you are now afraid to since it's become a rather old topic? So get his number first, and maybe start hinting toward it with texts? I know that is not the proper way to start a relationship, but I have certainly noticed males are braver to say something through written words than their mouths in most cases lol.

Good luck

[Wakeup]

Two things immediately came to mind:

1.

It's really frustrating because as you can probably tell, I really like this guy, and all I want is to know if he feels the same but I can't ask him I'm terrified of ruining what we have already.

What you have already? What exactly do you have other then him giving you the time of day and stealing a kiss? Has he been dating you? Asking you out just you and him? Where do you "hang out" with him?

2.

I've also recently found out that all of his colleagues in his area know about me and what happened between us so he's obviously talking about me!

This is a red flag. You're not even official and he's telling people he copped a kiss off of you yet he's not giving you any indication that he wants to do more then cop a kiss (or more)?

A third thing that came to mind is, do you know for a fact that he's single?

Sure, it's obvious he likes you but at what capacity he likes you is the question. Stop falling all over yourself with false feelings. He's not shown you in anyway that you can be vulnerable to him and be safe doing so. Check your feeeeelings at this point. Give him your phone digits and tell him to feel free to hit you up. Then see what he does with them.

Keep in mind that he's blabbing about what he's accomplished with you so far. You're taking that as a good sign when it's anything but that.

[babybesocial]

Ashbee!

Congratulations on your recent turn of events with this guy. Sounds like you are in the process of falling for him.

In my humble opinion...why not keep it simple?

Try to make it a joke with him to ease the tension....

You: So you know, I'm not gonna wait forever for you to ask me out! (tilt your head, and smile a little). Just think about that...I like coffee and I also love going to brunches. Talk soon! ( And then run along without giving him a chance to answer you right then and there).

This will give it some time to simmer and it won't put too much pressure on him to respond right away. By the way, you can change the "coffee" and "brunches" to anything you actually like. I was just using an example.

If he likes you, odds are he is going to ask you out shortly after. He might just be a really shy and nervous guy. This is a good way to nudge him a little in the right direction.

Ciao!

Baby Be Social

[babybesocial]

Ashbee,

Point#2 by "wake up" is a very good point. It is not very gentleman to "kiss and tell" so just be wary about that. It is a bit incoherent that he is "too shy" to ask you out, but not "too shy" to tell everyone at work about what happened between the two of you.

From what you say, he seems to be into you and has shown kind gestures. Yet, he told everyone at the office about what happened so that is a bit strange.