Is it fine to date other people in the beginning of the dating game?

**michelle23** · 10-05-13, 05:19 AM

Cant help yourself can you? *sigh*

**BackUpOrGetStng** · 10-05-13, 05:30 AM

Originally Posted by michelle23

I was always good at spotting the stereotypical ones. He was "the nice guy" that everyone thought wasnt capable of hurting a fly. I learned to spot those bastards too-the ones your not expecting to be cheats.

There is no stereotypical one. Anyone can cheat, and there is no "look" to spot. Since you say there is, I challenge you to describe it. How can you confirm you were good at spotting them? Did you go out with them once, tell them no thanks, and then they dated your friend and cheated on her? How did you learn to spot the nice-guy-bastard-cheaters? What do you look for?

You say that you dated before believe it or not, but I specifically said you have no experience dating as a single adult. Basic math is a tough subject for me, but I'm pretty sure 23 - 5 = 18, so you you really couldn't have much experience, if any. Please check my math and confirm.

Please substantiate your claims.

**lamobatsman** · 10-05-13, 05:44 AM

another q- should you sleep with a girl first before getting feelings???

**BackUpOrGetStng** · 10-05-13, 05:59 AM

Originally Posted by lamobatsman

another q- should you sleep with a girl first before getting feelings???

I think there should be a clearly reciprocated connection before getting feelings. In most cases for me that's going to entail sleeping with me. I've made the mistake of giving attention whores too much credit up front. Not anymore.

**lamobatsman** · 10-05-13, 06:22 AM

Originally Posted by BackUpOrGetStng

I think there should be a clearly reciprocated connection before getting feelings. In most cases for me that's going to entail sleeping with me. I've made the mistake of giving attention whores too much credit up front. Not anymore.

as a guy u shud **** them first before developing feelings though? cos i hear girls will develop feelings fter uv slept with them. and it doesnt make u look like a weirdo if u have feelings for a girl after sex?

**lamobatsman** · 10-05-13, 06:24 AM

also what do you mean by u made the mistake of giving attention whores too much credit up front?

**Wakeup** · 10-05-13, 06:26 AM

Originally Posted by michelle23

Cant help yourself can you? *sigh*

*sighs* it was a joke, take a pill I was just "lightening up the mood.

**michelle23** · 10-05-13, 06:34 AM

Backup refer to the thread "why men cheat" youll find my answers there. The main thing id avoid 100% is insecure peopleas well as people who have a rep for treating women badly. I also look to see how much emotional intelligence/emotional maturity and lok at their past experiences/relationships.

Another thing is to follow instincts.

I met my bf on my 19th bday.

Im not sure why your questioning my ability to read people. I have a good man by my side and im happy

**michelle23** · 10-05-13, 06:38 AM

Originally Posted by lamobatsman

as a guy u shud **** them first before developing feelings though? cos i hear girls will develop feelings fter uv slept with them. and it doesnt make u look like a weirdo if u have feelings for a girl after sex?

You can develop feelings with or without sex.that goes for both men and women and jst coz a woman has sex with you-it doesnt mean shes gonna automatically fall in love with you. Love doesnt just happen. You spend at least 6months infatuated before the love bond even begins to develop. Thats talking scientifically though. Most people confuse infatuation for love

**lamobatsman** · 10-05-13, 06:46 AM

they say as a guy u shud sleep with them first before you get feelings otherwise it wont be recipricated?

**michelle23** · 10-05-13, 06:56 AM

Who says that? Its not true.

If you put yourself in the friendzone by becoming her best mate and waiting 6months to ask her out then yes your shooting yourself in the foot

If you try it on too soon- then its unlikely to work out.

If theres attraction, a spark, chemistry and you get on well-the reality is you prob will have feelings for her and she you before sex happens-thats if you wait a little while.

**michelle23** · 10-05-13, 06:59 AM

Most people are looking for love and if there investing time in you-they see potential in you. There are a lot of assholes obviously but you can learn to spot the warning signs early

why are you so afraid of getting hurt? Your terrified of liking someone. You should just relax and go with the flow. If you like her, you like her. There is no law saying you have to do anything before you feel something

**lamobatsman** · 10-05-13, 07:11 AM

im scared of my feelings ( when i get them). i was scared when i got them for her and i told her this before. im scared of getting feelings again.

But i think u already know this

**michelle23** · 10-05-13, 07:23 AM

I know, i know. You need to work on building your confidence so you feel good enough for the next girl you meet. Right now you have a self destruct button and it will destroy any relationship you find yourself in.

Stop being so afraid. So what if you get hurt? Your not gonna die and youll pick yourself up again. A brokn heart heals just like a broken leg. You dont need to fear it

**BackUpOrGetStng** · 10-05-13, 07:25 AM

Originally Posted by michelle23

Backup refer to the thread "why men cheat" youll find my answers there. The main thing id avoid 100% is insecure peopleas well as people who have a rep for treating women badly. I also look to see how much emotional intelligence/emotional maturity and lok at their past experiences/relationships.

So, you can do all of this in one date? I call bs, but we'll have to agree to disagree.

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