I may have screwed up everything

[JJhon]

Hi.
I have met a wonderful girl a couple months ago, we used to talk everyday, about 4 hours a day and used to send SMS all the time.
We have met in in counters, not officially dates, on one day she was very flirty with me, we cuddle for a entire movie, hands hold, sometimes I fondle her belly, she liked it, and so on...

When I took her home, she told me to stop the car. I thought 'is she going to exit here?' and then she kissed me! A very long kiss!!

Next week she invited me to her friend's party on a night club, I picked her up and since that she was very flirty, passing her hand on my leg. We danced very intimate.
On the end of the night when I took her home again, she kissed me with me counting on it, I tried to respond to it, I put my hand behind her ear, and we continued our way.

Since that day she texted me less, almost didn't wanted to talk with me. She was saying that she didn't wanted to talk because she was very tired from her school works and so on (she's in art design it requires a lot of work indeed)
Bur I thought that she didn't wanted to talk because something I did wrong, or so...

Turns out that I pressed her to much, she used to tell me everything that happened on her life, and now we look like two unknowns talking to each other...

We were never a couple, just friends, but there was a huge trust between us

My question now is this: how do I fix this up? I already told her I was sorry in person, said to her that I was very regretted with pushing her. She says that already apologized me, but doesn't even want to talk to me, she said that I was a bit child for trying to push, I think I really like her, but sometimes she treats me like crap, she doesn't insult me, actually she is very sweet, but she ignores some of my messages for 12hours for example

What do I do??

Sent from my Galaxy S2

[Wakeup]

If everything went down the way you said it did with her initiating those kisses and you responding then I say don't even call her anymore if she's telling you that she thinks you pushed her. She's bloody nuts, childish, confused and not ready to be in a relationship with you.

Let her contact you again if she's told you she doesn't even want to talk to you. You can do better than a little girl who teases and then pulls back just because you kissed her back.

It will be hard to do but I suggest you start looking to date others and forget about her. If she changes her mind and does want you to talk to her, she knows how to contact you. Think twice before responding to her... you can do better with someone who doesn't play these types of games.

[basilandthyme]

Is this the same girl who kissed you once and then kissed you again before saying that she didn't feel anything?' http://www.loveforum.net/threads/79128-How-to-get-over-with-a-girl?highlight=

If so, you didn't do anything wrong. It simply wasn't meant to be.

[JJhon]

She doesn't said that she didn't wanted to talk with me, I fell that.

You don't get it, in all of this time we were friends, I responded with putting my hand behind her ear (it was our 3rd kiss, I felt that I should do something so I did)

Now I only want her friendship, because she's a person who I can really trust

Sent from my Galaxy S2

[JJhon]

Is this the same girl who kissed you once and then kissed you again before saying that she didn't feel anything?' [url]http://www.loveforum.net/threads/79128-How-to-get-over-with-a-girl?highlight=[/url]

If so, you didn't do anything wrong. It simply wasn't meant to be.

Its she, but I want her friendship do bad!!!

I tried to not to talk to her for a week. I didn't contacted her, neither she did to me. I could stop thinking about her, the next day was worst than the before...

Sent from my Galaxy S2

[Wakeup]

ahhhh... I never read his other thread...

Forget it dude. You don't need her friendship. Go get yourself a great male "pal" and keep woman for romatincal reasons. She's not into you so don't lower yourself by being demoted to her male girlfriend.

[JJhon]

It feels so hard!!

I was 1 entire week without talking to her, and every single hour in thought about her, I contacted her, I couldn't keep it anymore

Sent from my Galaxy S2

[Valixy]

Some girls of that age watch too many romantic films, I think, so they start idealizing love and everything it involves. She probably thinks that she will one day meet her knight in shining armour and that every kiss should transport her to a fairy land. Meanwhile she shortly enjoys receiving attention from a nice guy that she likes enough to play with and experience a little bit her power of seduction on him. Then reality doesn't fit her idealized scenarios, so she pulls away and this will be the general attitude towards other guys too for some time.

The friendship you think you two had was based on her receiving her some male attention and trying to fulfill some unrealistic love fantasies, not on what you had to offer or what you two could have had together, so it was not an authentic friendship. Unless I'm missing something, I don't see how you pressed her too much. You were probably trying to ask for a proper explanation when her behaviour changed? I suppose she has found it difficult to explain that she's only interested in a little bit of flirting and as long as it suits her since she is not equipped emotionally for anything else at the moment. If you would like a real frienship or love relationship then you should start looking around and stop suffering for this girl.

[JJhon]

I know that, the only problem is that I just can't forget about her.

I have put in my head that thinking about her, talk to her will just let me be more sad.

After this mess with her, I started go to the gym, have met new people, regain contact with 2 awesome girls that I didn't talked to in 8 years!!

That's awesome, but I remember her all the times, and this is painful as crap.

Sent from my Galaxy S2

[bearz]

Just keep in mind, if she's not interested in you in the same way that you are interested in her and you keep contacting her that frequently, being all pushy, she's just going to distance herself even further from you. It's time you let things cool off.

You should see if any of these other two girls are interested in going out. You won't forget the girl right away, she'll be on your mind for a long time, but the more other things you do to keep you occupied the less often you have to think about her.

[Valixy]

Give yourself a little bit more time. This has been intense for you but luckily it has only lasted for two months, so you should be better in time. You should realise one thing though, you don't long for her, you long for a connection that you were looking for in her. She failed to give it to you, was not the right person, it happens, so try to connect with other people and things that can give you positive feelings, joy, excitement and you'll feel better about yourself. Of course you'll still look for a genuine heart connection just like everybody does, but you can also try to make your search a happy one.

[JJhon]

The last 3 weeks I didn't even talked about that subject, when we do talk it's about clothes, accessories, gaming (we are both gamers)

I simply lost her Confidence and I don't know how to regain it.

She used to say that she loved to hug me, cause she liked to be on her tiptoes. One of these days I was felling very sad, and I texted her saying 'will you hug me?' she answered 'I will think about it' and I said 'I wonder if when you said that you love to hug me it was genuine...' and she answered 'times change and wills change'

I would be much more relief if she said 'I don't want to talk to you, I don't like you even has a friend'



Sent from my Galaxy S2

[JJhon]

@valixy i tried 7 days, on the first and second I was ok, not ok ok, I was a bit sad. I couldn't get my mind off her.
On the next days it went worse because I felt that she wasn't giving a sh** if I was even breathing...

I know that I should feel the same way to her, but I don't. That's the problem

Sent from my Galaxy S2

[Valixy]

It's complicated, I know. You'll figure it out though.

I think you didn't lose her trust, I think she stopped being interested in you because she just can't hold her interest too long in any guy at the moment. Her behaviour towards you was just some kind of romantic initiative, not love or a serious interest in you, she was just experimenting, discovering herself in this game of attraction, then she pulled away, leave it like that or you'll keep being unhappy because she can't offer you more. If you would like something deeper, you should look for another girl. You'll find strength when you'll start putting yourself first and accept this isn't the right thing for you because you're suffering. You will feel better, it won't happen over night, but it sure will!

[Wakeup]

The last 3 weeks I didn't even talked about that subject, when we do talk it's about clothes, accessories, gaming (we are both gamers)

I simply lost her Confidence and I don't know how to regain it.

She used to say that she loved to hug me, cause she liked to be on her tiptoes. One of these days I was felling very sad, and I texted her saying 'will you hug me?' she answered 'I will think about it' and I said 'I wonder if when you said that you love to hug me it was genuine...' and she answered 'times change and wills change'

I would be much more relief if she said 'I don't want to talk to you, I don't like you even has a friend'



Sent from my Galaxy S2

Gawd: Just quit talking to her. She's a snob who you had a crush on. She's not feeling the same way for you as you are for her. Stop stroking her ego now. No more contact.