Should I seek counseling or therapy?

[nathoonder]

I'm hopelessly in love with a girl who only wants me for my money. Over the course of a month I've spent nearly 400$ on this girl, and I know she's seeing someone else I know I shouldn't stay but I can NOT will her out of my life. I'm 23 and this is my first relationship and she means everything to me. She hugs me, holds my hand and pretends to care about me and I can't will that out of my life no matter how detrimental that consequences are. I keep telling myself I shouldn't see her anymore but it's became almost an addiction and I really do care about her, I'm definitely not strong enough to stop seeing her on my own.

[pcmaster]

you are in trouble man. Its not easy to stop seeing that kind of girl. Realise that you body was lonely and its the only girl that you know so well. Problem is that you dont realy have choice because shes the only girl in the world - in your world. Try socialise with friends, ask them help, look for support in family, call a helpline - they will ask you 100 questions(explore your problem) and you gona realise much better your situation and what to do next.

Talk with some other girls too, cause you desrve to - shes seeing someone else anyway. Dont become emotional pussy just because life is not fair. Man up and know what you are worth.

[searock]

Are you PeterSC?

[nathoonder]

Are you PeterSC?

No. Who is that?

[pcmaster]

Its the guy with the same story as yours. Very similar story, only guy didnt wanted to give up on her. It ended up with girl quiting and ignoring him but the guy become so illusional that he still thinks she will come back.

[HeartIsAching]

So you're in love with a subtle hooker. Wow, that sucks.

[coconutz]

or you keep spending money on her for some attention or
you really stop and force yourself to move on.
you are not the only one that have to do this.
so its possible if you really want to.

[Wakeup]

I'm hopelessly in love with a girl who only wants me for my money. Over the course of a month I've spent nearly 400$ on this girl, and I know she's seeing someone else I know I shouldn't stay but I can NOT will her out of my life. I'm 23 and this is my first relationship and she means everything to me. She hugs me, holds my hand and pretends to care about me and I can't will that out of my life no matter how detrimental that consequences are. I keep telling myself I shouldn't see her anymore but it's became almost an addiction and I really do care about her, I'm definitely not strong enough to stop seeing her on my own.

She sees men like you coming from a mile away. You need therapy because you see what she does to you, yet your self-esteem is so low that you would rather have a user in your life who "holds your hand" then leave her and be alone.

Get therapy and read books on co-dependency, fear of being alone, martyrdom, and lack of self-worth. The fact that you suffer from all of those dysfunctions is clear by your own admission.

[nathoonder]

I go through mood changes on what to do. Sometimes I feel like there is no way I can keep spending time and money on this girl, sometimes she even ditches me for other dudes and it's like "really? After I spend all this money on you". But other times I feel like I need her in my life. Other women AREN'T appealing to me at this point and my performance at work has shot way up since meeting her. So it's really hard for me to say...Wouldn't I just end up paying that therapist a lot of money? So what's the point? At least this girl shows me infrequent scraps of affection.

[Wakeup]

So wtf are you asking a forum board for if you're too weak to let her go then let her use you. Just be sure that you don't blame all women for the piss poor way she treats you when she finds someone she can manipulate with even more money then you and he won't tolerate her hanging out with you so SHE dumps you for good.

[nathoonder]

I was asking because I'm not sure what to do. I'm very conflicted on this matter and am quite frustrated. As for blaming other women, I wish I would of never met this girl because now I don't even WANT to be with other women.

[Wakeup]

I wish I would of never met this girl because now I don't even WANT to be with other women.

That's why you need therapy.

[nathoonder]

Isn't that how people in love typically feel though?

[pcmaster]

If its ok with you morale then get a slut. Its good therapy to forget the ex.

[Wakeup]

Isn't that how people in love typically feel though?

NO. That's how door mats typically get treated and think it's love. Get help for your codependency. It's quite pathetic how you allow yourself to be treated and still think it's love just because she graces you with a held hand. Sad!

Maybe pcmaster is onto something.(sans the "slut" comment) Go get yourself laid so you can stop your nonsense thinking.