Long Distance Relationship

[RAHhellman]

I've been with my gf for almost 5yrs now and she lives in cali while i live in connecticut. It's been really tough, but we've gotten thru so many obstacles until this 1 that we cant come to an agreement on. Now my whole family and friends kno that she is my gf and they have met her because she has come here a couple of times. Only a select few of her friends kno about me and none of her family because she says they're really strict with her. I am 21 and she is 22. She has recently started going out a lot more and when she is with her friends she wont respond to me or txt me back for hours, but whenever she calls or txt me i respond pretty quickly especially when im not at work. We have argued about it a lot and she says she'll try and get better, but still nothing has changed. What makes me uneasy the most is she has a lot of guy friends and will hang out with them. Just tonight she told me she was going to hang out with 2 of her friends a male and a female, but its been over an hour since i have heard from her and several phone calls and a txt. I dont kno what to do anymore i am stuck because she'll think of a reason like she was having fun and was caught in the moment so she forgot to look at her phone. Is it normal in a relationship for the other person to not respond to u while they are with their friends or for their parents to not kno that u have been dating for almost 5yrs?

[VincenzoG91]

Of those five years, how much actual face-to-face time did you two spend together? Hopefully it was a lot, because otherwise you are going to lose her soon. Which one of you is moving, and when? And even if she isn't looking for a more geographically convenient boyfriend, she may become alienated by your insecurity when it crosses over into distrust. Plus, she is going to be hit on in the bar scene. Might just be better for both of you two to split up.

[basilandthyme]

but its been over an hour since i have heard from her and several phone calls and a txt. I dont kno what to do anymore i am stuck because she'll think of a reason like she was having fun and was caught in the moment so she forgot to look at her phone. Is it normal in a relationship for the other person to not respond to u while they are with their friends or for their parents to not kno that u have been dating for almost 5yrs?

It's totally normal for her to not call you or text you while on a fun night out. Am I right in understanding that you got all paranoid and made several phone calls and a text while she was out? Get a grip, man. She's absolutely right in not buying into your neurotic behaviour. Wish her a good night out and then don't bother her till the next day.

It's not normal for her parents not to know about you. And if she's going out at nights with friends, then her parents aren't that strict. There's another reason she's not telling them about you.

My best advice is to end this rubbish and find a girl who lives close to you - one who you can have an actual relationship with. I mean, don't you need physical affection and companionship?