Omgot my thread hast been hijacked!!1
Omgot my thread hast been hijacked!!1
Consider it an honor. It only happens to the entertaining threads.
Oh Lawdie, I'm glad that isn't always true. xD
I'm somewhat creative, somewhat analytical. I don't like being smothered, I need some space, and yet, at the same time, I like when I can be best friends with my partner. I definitely get more from small gestures and it makes sense. I was always closest with my Mom and one of the ways she showed her love for us kids was by buying us random stuff. She'd bring a candy bar home for us from time to time and while my brother never gave it any thought, I always took it more seriously. Yeah, it was less than $2 but it meant something - my Mom, tired from working 12 hour days, stressed, living a rather unhappy life, was at the store, probably rushing to get home, and thought about me. Not only that but she remembered what I liked. I'm sort of perceptive, I take things in and learn about people, so when a guy actually picks up on the type of person I am and can make me happy that way, it means a lot to me. A casual trip to the bookstore would mean a lot more to me than an expensive piece of jewelry. It would mean he actually knows who he's dating and is at least okay with my quirks enough to indulge me.
That's funny... because that's me. I'd make you crazy in days, LOL.
I love my wife to pieces. I defer to her in pretty much anything, unless it's important to me. Usually we decide everything together. Not because I'm too weak or undecided or whatever, merely because her happiness is important to me. If she wants to go out to dinner, she picks the restaurant - unless she wants me to pick it, or it's important to me. We put a movie on, she gets first pick... you get the idea. But that works for us, and doesn't for you.
But neither of us is dominant, and I'm learning to not be controlling.
^that's an odd relationship. The relationships of today, however, are formed on the basis of an established dominant person, i.e. the alpha male.
It's an evolved relationship. Our relationship is an equal partnership. It's my contention that only equal partnerships can be really good relationships... and that's supported by mental health professionals. The implied or expressed violence in a dominant/submissive relationship must change, if we're to survive as a species. We've gotten too numerous and live too closely to continue to solve our differences with violence, whether physical, sexual, emotional or mental. Violence begets nothing but more violence, and worse it propagates through generations.
My boyfriend and I also decide things together. There's never one of the two who imposes their decision on the other, unless it's something very important to one of the two and the other isn't bothered one way or the other.
I make all the final decisions when it comes to the house (because I own it). But when it comes to his own money and how he spends it, he does whatever he wants. We don't share anything except for household expenses, so there is nothing to fight over.
I'm aggressive (duh) so I never followed by example....my mom has always been dependent on someone (marriage/ inheritance/investing that money) to support her. I rather work hard for my own money, and support myself, buy my own car etc.
Last edited by smackie9; 05-12-12 at 04:41 AM.