Attractiveness..

[Love'sReject]

Let's say things between you and a prospective date don't pan out; they reject you (obviously this thread is directed towards guys because women don't ask for dates; they just get them without trying).

You prove yourself to be fascinating, nice and a good flirt, voila! Relationship strikes up.

Would you not be insulted even though you ended up in a relationship because they don't think you're physically attractive? Obviously, you had to act in a way that overcome apparent physical defects. Is that not insulting?

Like, they didn't want to date you at first because you're not attractive but then they "decided" to give you a "chance." Doesn't that insinuate being desperate enough to go out with an ugly guy?

The relationship seems like a backhanded compliment and established on false premises.

[PurleaseeeeeGF]

.

[bcgirl]

Umm yah, who the f*** would say that? And besides, this girl can't be that hot is she can't find a man who is hot, smart etc and has the whole pkg if she had to settle for unattractive

[Love'sReject]

True, bcgirl. Leagues are good; they keep us uggoes in reality. An unattractive guy like me should be incredibly suspicious of the motives or mental state of an attractive girl that shows interest.

I've heard girls tell guys: "I'm sooooo glad I gave you a chance."

[PurleaseeeeeGF]

If your mongo theory has a shred of truth to it, surely you should get a chance to prove your charm with one of these "hot chicks"? Try taking your head out your ass for a day and see what happens, bro.

[Love'sReject]

This isn't a theory; it's asking a hypothetical.

[PurleaseeeeeGF]

Ah sorry bro, i never read the whole OP. Got bored after the first sentence, Carry on.

[dem862]

Most of the women I have known (which is not that many) look at all prospective dates with suspicion, because of the actions of the very assertive cadre of men who only want them for sex. Therefore, they tend to require to be "won over" by some mystical characteristic which is not necessarily good looks.

[Love'sReject]

But they tend to give attractive guys more opportunities to prove that they don't only want them for sex over us unattractive guys.

[gobabeyourself]

I'm not making any judgment yet.
But isn't allure what makes us attracted to a person in the first place? In most cases, like when a prospective date is someone you aren't well acquainted with, the prevailing reason to want to date this person is their appeal.
This applies to both sides in my opinion. You seem to be putting all of your focus on women--as you stated, being selective over the person they'd date purely based on an attractiveness scale. Unless the case is that the individual seeking dates is asking every single woman out there I wouldn't be ready to draw any conclusions, since that would be impossible (and not to mention desperate), but my point is that the guy making the effort to initiate something with a woman is certainly also based on his appeal to her.
Now, on to the situation you're referring to. Did the context of this situation involve her making a reference that her consideration to date you was based on the attractiveness she has toward you?
It just sounds a little insecure on your part and that you are undermining yourself.

[vashti]

Doesn't that insinuate being desperate enough to go out with an ugly guy?

Another silly thread. Should women be insulted that their men only settled out of deseration, when they really are more attracted to the latest celebrity, too?

[bcgirl]

But they tend to give attractive guys more opportunities to prove that they don't only want them for sex over us unattractive guys.

Survival of the fittest

[bcgirl]

Generally ppl tend to be with ppl on the same level of attractiveness. Do u see 10's with 5's very much? No, unless the 10 was using the 5 for something like Ryan Reynolds dating Alanis moresette, he used her as a stepping stone for his career and succeeded thus dated hotter girls on the same attractiveness level

[Hotaru]

Dating someone you find attractive isn't always as horrible as it's made out to be. You aren't really supposed to be attracted to someone who has horrible hygiene and an extra 100 pounds on them, they aren't healthy and it's a turn off. If you're referring to those people who will only pick the absolute most attractive partners, don't worry about them so much.

[Love'sReject]

I'm not making any judgment yet.
But isn't allure what makes us attracted to a person in the first place? In most cases, like when a prospective date is someone you aren't well acquainted with, the prevailing reason to want to date this person is their appeal.
This applies to both sides in my opinion. You seem to be putting all of your focus on women--as you stated, being selective over the person they'd date purely based on an attractiveness scale. Unless the case is that the individual seeking dates is asking every single woman out there I wouldn't be ready to draw any conclusions, since that would be impossible (and not to mention desperate), but my point is that the guy making the effort to initiate something with a woman is certainly also based on his appeal to her.
Now, on to the situation you're referring to. Did the context of this situation involve her making a reference that her consideration to date you was based on the attractiveness she has toward you?
It just sounds a little insecure on your part and that you are undermining yourself.

The situation is hypothetical; I can't get involved with girls these days.