Proposing without a ring

[DreamBeans]

I have been with my girlfriend for about 2.5 years now. We are really happy together and have been living together for about 6 months. I know she's the one for me. I want to propose to her at the start of next year.

We'll be going abroad for the first time together to a very romantic place in a few months. I have been biding my time to find the right moment to do it, and the photos I have seen of the area are too perfect to pass up. So I am keen to propose then and there.

The problem is that I don't have a ring. I really want to go out and spend ungodly amounts of money on a ring for her, but I am also a really practical person and the idea of spending all that money on an engagement ring when it could be used for our future is scary. My girlfriend also suggested that she is more interested in putting our money toward out future than by wasting it on a ring. We would like to start a family within the next 2 years.

So, here's my idea. I will take her to a nice secluded spot on the beach, get down on one knee and tell her how much I love her and ask her to marry me, then, once we get back, we can look for a ring together. Does this sound like a good plan?

[luvcoq]

Yeah, great plan.

[Cerby]

If she loves you the plan is great. The ring won't matter, especially if she agrees the money is better put towards a future.

[luvcoq]

I've changed my mind, I dont like this plan one bit.

[DreamBeans]

I hope my girlfriend doesn't change her mind like you, luvcoq.

I know this isn't a big deal, but should I at least give her something? I mean, like a placeholder ring, or do you think my original idea is better? I kind of imagine myself on my knee feeling awkward without holding something, like Jack Donaghy been filmed

[searock]

I think you should buy her a ring that isn't too expensive but still looks pretty and like you thought of her while choosing it (for example if she likes a certain jem stone you can try getting a ring with that stone on it, even if a small one). She'll appreciate the gesture and the proposal will seem more "serious", and she'll also appreciate the fact that you didn't spend a lot of money on it, since you both prefer to save it to spend for your future together.

[HeartIsAching]

There's nothing wrong with that plan at all - she's even said that she would rather spend the money on investing in your future. She sounds like a wonderful woman.

As Cerby says, the ring isn't important. What it symbolizes is.

[Wakeup]

I don't think it matters what she "said" the ring is a circle to represent unbroken or.. never ending love. I agree with Sea in that you should get her an inexpensive ring. If you're going to propose in a traditional manner, then you should have the ring that goes along with the tradition. No need to spend "an ungodly amount of money."

If she's told you outright NOT to get her a ring. Like: "Do Not buy me a ring I think that practice is ridiculous" then I'd be more inclined to believe that she really doesn't want one rather than my current vibe that she just said that because she thought that's what you wanted to hear.

If you really believed she didn't want one, then you wouldn't have started this thread, would you?

[Boisdevie]

Don't buy her a ring. Then if she turns you down you've not wasted any money.

[Wakeup]

... if in the remote chance that happens, he can return the ring and get his money back. Just make sure you know the store return policy before purchasing, Op.

[surfhb]

Note to all men! If a women expects you to buy a ring beyond what is realistic.....run. My newphew is 25 and just bought a $10k ring with the girl knowing damn well what he makes and how much THEY owe now....and they're not even married. So sad

[Boisdevie]

Your nephew is clearly a tit. And she's a dimwitted gold digger.

[Wakeup]

List the ring as a joint investment in their insurance policy rather than a "gift" to her. Then, if anything happens to their union.. she'll have to sell it and he'll get half of his money back at least gold and diamonds normally increase in value. Spending $10,000 for a ring is an outrageously stupid thing to have done. IMO.

[Fruitsss]

if u want to buy a engagement ring it doesnt have to be expensive. at least not a fair ring .lol

and its more nice if u buy it and give it to her. so it can be really something yours to her.

[surfhb]

Your nephew is clearly a tit. And she's a dimwitted gold digger.

Exactly my point