I need advice on how to part ways with a girl I am so fond of?

[xxazurexx]

Hmmm, sure you aren't married? Or from a culture where relationships with certain type of people are frowned on?

[surfhb]

Take everything with a grain of salt on this site.

You need to get a grip on reality. Youve never met this person therefore you don't know each other. Just tell her you're not interested. It's only fair to her. She won't be that upset for very long since there's nothing of substance between you two......make sense now?

[searock]

I also think you should just tell her the truth. Why not? It's not like you've killed someone and are off to jail, or like you're married, or something. Just be honest.

[Wakeup]

You guys are replying to me as though I am some kind of moron, I only came here for advice. Not be be spoken to as though I am not welcome

I am not a bad person, but I am in severe pain right now. You are not in my shoes, so you don't know how it is.

I want to tell her the truth, but in the nicest way possible.... so it doesn' t make me look like a cold person

Yea... you said that twice already. Just tell her the truth and let her decide if you are a cold person or not. You can't do shitty things and then expect to not be looked upon as shitty. That's the bottomline so just tell the truth and let the chips fall where the may.

[basilandthyme]

I think that by keeping your issues secret and simply ending things so that she doesn't get hurt, she will resent you enormously. She'll be confused and hurt and angry - and justifiably so - because you've withheld information and taken away her choice.

I suggest you be honest with her. And let her make a decision about whether or not she wants to be involved with you. If you respect her, then she deserves nothing less.

[reeba]

My thoughts are ..... you KNEW you didn't want to date. So you joined the dating site thinking it was an entertaining and a safe environment since you really didn't want to meet anyone.

Well now you met someone, she wants to meet you, and now you are all nuerotic and wanting to dump her.

2 months of chatting does not constitute a lengthy explaination for discontinuing your 'chatting' relationship. But tell her the truth/white lie. Don't be an asshole and ruin her for the next guy who tries to date her. Tell her the truth/white lie so it is a truly 'not you, but me' reason for discontinuing. If your flaw is as bad as you think, she will be happy to break the whole thing off.

[Pringles200]

My thoughts are ..... you KNEW you didn't want to date. So you joined the dating site thinking it was an entertaining and a safe environment since you really didn't want to meet anyone.

Well now you met someone, she wants to meet you, and now you are all nuerotic and wanting to dump her.

2 months of chatting does not constitute a lengthy explaination for discontinuing your 'chatting' relationship. But tell her the truth/white lie. Don't be an asshole and ruin her for the next guy who tries to date her. Tell her the truth/white lie so it is a truly 'not you, but me' reason for discontinuing. If your flaw is as bad as you think, she will be happy to break the whole thing off.

]My thoughts are ..... you KNEW you didn't want to date. So you joined the dating site thinking it was an entertaining and a safe environment since you really didn't want to meet anyone.

Well now you met someone, she wants to meet you, and now you are all nuerotic and wanting to dump her.

Wrong. I joined the site, because I had never had a proper relationship, and because I am now 26, I wanted to hurry up and get a girlfriend, someone who I could also have as a soul mate. I joined the site, in the hope of finally meeting a girl.... but have now realised what a mistake I made by joining the site.


2 months of chatting does not constitute a lengthy explaination for discontinuing your 'chatting' relationship. But tell her the truth/white lie. Don't be an asshole and ruin her for the next guy who tries to date her. Tell her the truth/white lie so it is a truly 'not you, but me' reason for discontinuing. If your flaw is as bad as you think, she will be happy to break the whole thing off.

That is exactly what I want to do... as I mentioned in my first post. I want to tell her the truth.. but the only thing is, I want to choose the right wording... make her smile when she reads it, but also understand the reasons

[IndiReloaded]

I want to tell her the truth.. but the only thing is, I want to choose the right wording... make her smile when she reads it, but also understand the reasons

Stop being an ass. The longer you drag this out, the crueller you are being. NOT taking a necessary action is just as bad as a wrong action.

Tell her that you've been thinking that a dating site is not the way you want to be meeting people. Tell her you think she's a wonderful girl, blah, blah, but that you don't see a future in your relationship and you want to date people locally. Thank her for her time and say goodbye.

That's it. Classy and to the point. Anything else is just muddying the waters and you being an insensitive ass. Sometimes, kindness is NOT telling someone everything you are thinking/feeling.