I have what I'm sure is somewhat of a common problem. I have a high sex drive and my wife does not. Usually we have sex about once or twice a week but to be honest I could go pretty much every day. When we do have sex it's decent...but I tend to like a little foreplay (to be honest I prefer giving than receiving if that helps), and sometimes a bit of kinky stuff (toys etc.) whereas she usually prefers to just skip that and get to the good stuff...to keep the whole process shorter I suppose. Sometimes she'll offer to have sex when I know she clearly doesn't want to, but I don't like taking advantage of those situations. I understand that lately she feels more stressed out and a lot more tired (kids, job change etc.). Once in a while we bust it out and have really good sex but it's certainly become more rare. It's gotten to the point where my mind has started wandering...but I don't want it to wander. The sad thing is (I guess it's not sad really) is that I really
REALLY want my wife, and my wife only. I am just as attracted to her as the day we first met and she turns me on just as much now as she ever did.
So I've come up with what I thought was a decent solution. To pay my wife for sex...or extra sex above and beyond if that makes sense.
But before all of you gasp let me expand a touch...
She enjoys shopping, but feels she needs to hide some or all of her purchases in fear of upsetting me for spending too much (did I mention she enjoys shopping?). She's upset in that she's working so hard, not making a ton of money right at
the moment and just about all of her pay cheque is going towards bills, loans etc. as does mine. My job however, allows me to make a little extra cash on the side. I really don't spend any money on myself. So what I was thinking is I'd offer
her a bit of extra cash (that she can do whatever she wants with) in exchange for a bit of extra spice in the bedroom. She seems to have some kind of fantasy anyway about strippers and high end escorts (I'm thinking she sees some sort of
glamour in this?) so I thought it could also be presented perhaps as a bit of a role playing idea.
Is this a horrible idea? Will it wreck our marriage? Has anyone else done this before?