Hi everyone,
I am new on this board. I read some of your stories and it's inspiring to read different opinions.
Sadly my relationship of one year ended last weekend.
My ex-boyfriend broke up with me in a way that it doesn't feel like a final break up. Do you think you should stay in contact and friends with your ex if you are hoping for reconcilation? Has anyone had that kind of experience? I thought if you stay friends they will never realise if they really want to be with you or not! He is still coming to visit me next weekend for the Easter holiday. We are in a long-distance relationship. Some of my friends are surprised that he is still coming to see me instead of staying with is family and friens during the Easter holiday. What do you all think about it?
This is our last conversation:
He sent me this email:
just want to ask u something? are u still sure u want me to come to see u
next week? cos i 'm a bit worried for u, i dont know if it's good for u to see
me now. i could understand if u prefer to stay alone without seeing me for a
while to make u forget a bit and be less sad. Cos i know u re sad now and i m
not sure if it can improve the situation if u see me. please tell me the truth
about what u really want? u know if u dont want me to come, it doesnt mean that we wont see later after a while anymore cos i can understand u may need a bit of time to forget and be less sad.Tell me please
have a good day
xxx
I said I would like him to come and whether he still wants? He replied:
yes i will come if u re ok with it! i'm just worried that u could suffer more
if u see me, that's why i 'm asking u that. But yes what we said last week was
true!
xxx
I said to him:
i don't think i will suffer if i see you. i'll be happy to see you. If it was true what we said last week why did you tell me to forget in your email? I thought you told me that you don't want to close the door behind us? I thought we decided that it was taking a break to see how we feel later? xxx
He replied:
i meant to forget about your sadness.I m not closing any door at all but i dont want u to think that we may be together again cos u may wait for me and it wouldnt be very fair for u cos i never said we will be together again for sure. U know i said that cos Helen was in this kind of situation with Paul, she was like waiting for him for 2years and they are finally not together and they may never be together again. so she lost 2years. i dont want to do the same to u, it wouldnt be very fair for u. That's why i prefer to be clear by saying that i dont want to be back with u now and i cant promise u anything for the future. xxx
I said:
I appreciate you are so concerned for me. I thought me and you had a
different relationship to Helen's and the guy. So you prefer I don't wait
and take it as a final break up and not taking a break as we said to each
other? So you were just saying things like we can see 6 months later how we
feel to make me feel better but you knew that it's over completely for you?
Sorry about the questions. xxx
He replied:
of course it was different between us than with Helen's situation cos we
stayed more than one year together which is not Helen's case. but i didnt say that to make u feel better cos that's what i thought. but i never said we will be together again. i said it 's a break cos if it was a final break up we would never be together again cos we wouldnt talk to each other anymore maybe. and that's not what i want. i will not close the door but i didnt say we will be again together
xxx
Please help! How should I be with him when he comes?
Bee