GF chatting to man on facebook

Bridtown · 13-10-12, 12:29 AM

Hey all new to this so please be nice
Right me and GF have had problems with sex for a long time she says she just not intreated at all just nothing there when I did manage to get it I felt guilty as felt as she really didn't want it at all just doing it to make me feel happy

So I went away with my mother for 3day bash for a tobacco run when I came back I was really happy to see her just wanted a cuddle and a kiss but she just didn't seem bothered tbh a kiss seemed hard work so after a day or so of this nothing seemed right at all so hacked into her facebook looked messages you have to understand she is always on Facebook I am not happy with myself for what I did

When I started looking at messages there was 1 from a old friend /man he asked if she wer seeing anyone and she said (ish) and he started to invite her away pick her up and drop her off she said ok when she gets a weekend off ( not worried as sounded like she was tring to get rid of him been polite)

The other message started ok but as got down he said he wants to but his body on hers and that and she said she wants to put his hands down his pants and at the end of the message she said I am like a love sick puppy joking but really waiting for you

Since then I am 100% sure she knows I have read her messages and deleted them all she seems ok with me but I carnt get this outa my head its getting me down making me ill

Please any advise would be super

Thank you

**Boisdevie** · 13-10-12, 12:56 AM

She's not interested in sex with you. So why are you still with her? You really are wasting your time arent you?

**Maple1714** · 13-10-12, 01:14 AM

You need to break up and move on...she is too chicken to do it herself for some stupid reason

**AnthonyCasta** · 13-10-12, 01:50 AM

How long have you been together, and how old is she???

Bridtown · 13-10-12, 02:55 AM

Hey there thank you for your replys she is 26y she has 2 kids and I have 2 kids that live with us also we have 1 together lol

We have been together for about 4y living together for 3y

**Boisdevie** · 13-10-12, 03:17 AM

If you have kids then need to get this sorted out asap and I mean a big grown up talk with each other.

**Maple1714** · 13-10-12, 04:08 AM

Damn, yeah if you have kids then you gotta have a really serious talk. Listen, to me it sounds like she isn't interested in you romantically anymore. She is afraid to break things off b/c of the kids, but if she doesn't want to have sex and kissing is a chore then...yeah she feels stuck.

Look, I have a child with a wonderful man and he is 24yrs. I was having doubts just even a week ago and I started to get into contact with an ex via FB and texting :/ I sat down with my BF and told him everything. I am still sexually attracted to him and I love him more everyday. It's just hard b/c we rushed into things b/c I became pregnant...shit happens. When you are young parents its really really hard...there is prob. still a part of her that wonders what else it out there. I think that's just part of being young. So, for the past 3 days my BF and I have had some very serious talks and I was totally honest with him...he was upset and it made him scared/nervous to hear that I wasn't sure about our relationship...but you gotta have these talks. We are starting to be on the same page again and we had good make-up sex

Talk to her now.

**Boisdevie** · 13-10-12, 04:14 AM

Originally Posted by Maple1714

there is prob. still a part of her that wonders what else it out there.

Yeah if she hadn't had 3 kids her life would be such a lot less complicated. Shame we don't have easily available contraception.

**Maple1714** · 13-10-12, 04:19 AM

Originally Posted by Boisdevie

Yeah if she hadn't had 3 kids her life would be such a lot less complicated. Shame we don't have easily available contraception.

Yep...kids are wonderful but its hard. In the U.S. we have places called Planned Parenthood and you can go there at any age and get discounted and sometimes free IUD's and BC. But, for whatever reason I feel like our culture here has not promote the use of BC??

**smackie9** · 13-10-12, 04:32 AM

Bridtown, the writing is on the wall. If you don't act quickly, things will only end badly. Have an open honest talk with her. Ask her what she would like to see change in your relationship, maybe suggest couples counseling. It takes two to rebuild a relationship. If she isn't on board with you to do something about it, you might want to do a trial separation, to see if ending the relationship is what she truly wants. We have no magic solution to make things perfect. You have to man up and discuss things with her.

**AnthonyCasta** · 13-10-12, 04:55 AM

Personally, I feel if you are in a relationship, you should not be on facebook or myspace or any other social networking site ... Maybe you want to have a conversation with her about deleting it ...

Just keep in mind this is only a band aid, and will not solve any problem if she is bound to cheat ...

**smackie9** · 13-10-12, 06:40 AM

Originally Posted by AnthonyCasta

Personally, I feel if you are in a relationship, you should not be on facebook or myspace or any other social networking site ... Maybe you want to have a conversation with her about deleting it ...

Just keep in mind this is only a band aid, and will not solve any problem if she is bound to cheat ...

Seriously? You have trust issues....just tug that leash a little tighter.

**In Memoriam** · 13-10-12, 08:27 AM

Originally Posted by Boisdevie

Yeah if she hadn't had 3 kids her life would be such a lot less complicated. Shame we don't have easily available contraception.

Some people act like they've never heard of condoms which, used correctly, do a darn good job. And they're pretty available...I've even heard of people getting them for free (at least in the US).

**Maple1714** · 13-10-12, 11:15 AM

Yeah, but realistically people don't use them all the time. I agree, people need to be more careful but it happens. Now the OP and his GF need to address their present issues.

**InYourFACE** · 13-10-12, 05:40 PM

how old are u 10???

instead of walking around and posting it here you should confront her and deal with it with her.
cause there is the problem and solution

telling us is stupidity.

relationship is for mayor part communication.

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