"There isn't going to be a next time, sorry"

[John Stiles]

Hi ladies.

A couple of days ago I met a girl that I had been chatting with online for a week and a bit. It went very well. We went to a couple of pubs then I walked her to the bus stop. I expected a text shortly after, saying thanks for a nice time or whatever, but there was nothing. Then I sent her a text, she replied, positively (after quite a while), I sent another one, she replied (again, positively), then I sent one suggesting that we have phone sex, but she didn't reply. The next day she sent a text which is the title of this thread.

I have to point out that my suggestion isn't an issue, in my opinion, based on the fact that I'd suggested it a couple of times before (before we met), and although she said no she didn't seem to be put off. In my online profile I hinted that I wanted something casual and she seemed ok with that. Like I say I don't think at all that my text is directly the reason for her not wanting to meet again. Maybe indirectly in some way, but certainly not a problem in itself.

What I want to focus on is this :

She had a really good time when we met. I mean she was smiling and laughing almost continuously. And then she changed her mind.

In case it sounds like I'm bothered by all this, I'm really not, but I'm very curious to know what happened because it's important to know about people and how they think, and how to avoid problems in future.

There's more to this story but I'll leave you with this for now. If you have any questions just ask.

[Boisdevie]

It must have been he idea of having phone sex (whatever that is).

[John Stiles]

No it wasn't. As I say that was not an issue. It may have triggered a chain of thought, but really, it wasn't a problem in itself. It wasn't anything new, anything that I hadn't already suggested before. It wouldn't have shocked her. In fact she would have easily seen it for what it was, ie a continuation of the very very flirty behaviour between us towards the end, and probably quite understandable.

[smackie9]

Anyways, one date doesn't merit phone sex or any other kind of sex. You got pushy with the phone sex, when she already told you no before and you wouldn't give up on it, so ya that put her off. Right there told her that you are phone sex crazy jerk and that this wasn't going to work. It's quite possible she thought you were kidding at first but it turned out you were serious about it....not her thing.

BTW reading all this.....you are clueless on how to date women.

Casual or serious women want to be romanced before sex is given up.....you have to earn it.

If you are just looking for phone sex with strange women, I suggest you post an ad in the personals, say on Craigslist.

BTW you can't "hint" that you want casual....be honest say it's casual. I know it will lessen you chances but hey if you hint that means you are trying lure women....creepy

[searock]

Phone sex after just one date is creepy. I would have been creeped out. What made you think that she would have changed her mind about it after seeing you and having a good time with you? She had already told you no several times (why even keen asking after the first time?!). There she was, starting to think you were actually a nice, fun guy... and you showed her that you are actually a creep. Hope you learned your lesson.

[John Stiles]

Anyways, one date doesn't merit phone sex or any other kind of sex. You got pushy with the phone sex, when she already told you no before and you wouldn't give up on it, so ya that put her off. Right there told her that you are phone sex crazy jerk and that this wasn't going to work. It's quite possible she thought you were kidding at first but it turned out you were serious about it....not her thing.

BTW reading all this.....you are clueless on how to date women.

Casual or serious women want to be romanced before sex is given up.....you have to earn it.

If you are just looking for phone sex with strange women, I suggest you post an ad in the personals, say on Craigslist.

BTW you can't "hint" that you want casual....be honest say it's casual. I know it will lessen you chances but hey if you hint that means you are trying lure women....creepy

This is a good example of why I said that there's more to the story, and that if you have any questions, go ahead and ask.

[John Stiles]

Phone sex after just one date is creepy. I would have been creeped out. What made you think that she would have changed her mind about it after seeing you and having a good time with you? She had already told you no several times (why even keen asking after the first time?!). There she was, starting to think you were actually a nice, fun guy... and you showed her that you are actually a creep. Hope you learned your lesson.

As I said there's more to this story. I did say that if there are any questions, do ask.

[vashti]

"phone sex"???? seriously?

creepy.

[John Stiles]

"phone sex"???? seriously?

creepy.

Not necessarily. If you'd like to know what actually happened, you're welcome to ask, like I have said.

[oldskool83]

now ya ****ed up. now ya ****ed up, now you have ****ed up. you have now ****ed up!

the idea of causel well still gotta know her some king kong. and phone sex is lame, pull your wang out and throw it down. its all or nothing papa cawk.

my advice would be dont do this again. i would even go as far to telling the girl hey i have no ****ed up because i am a bloody moron. feel free to kick me in the dick tuesday after 5pm, name the place.

[John Stiles]

now ya ****ed up. now ya ****ed up, now you have ****ed up. you have now ****ed up!

the idea of causel well still gotta know her some king kong. and phone sex is lame, pull your wang out and throw it down. its all or nothing papa cawk.

my advice would be dont do this again. i would even go as far to telling the girl hey i have no ****ed up because i am a bloody moron. feel free to kick me in the dick tuesday after 5pm, name the place.

It would be best if you replied while sober. You're not making any sense.

[oldskool83]

i am sober. YOU****EDUP

[John Stiles]

i am sober. YOU****EDUP

Like I said in the OP, there's more to it. Put the drink down and learn to listen.

[oldskool83]

i dont drink, you messed up that simle jonathan

[smackie9]

This is a good example of why I said that there's more to the story, and that if you have any questions, go ahead and ask.

I see what I see and don't find a need to ask any questions, and neither does anyone else. If there is more to the story then f uckin post it instead of bitching about the answers.

Anyways you wanted a woman's opinion.....you got one.