Is he genuine or just messing me around?

[amymurphy123]

I'll try to make this as short as possible. So I was seeing this guy back last June, not exclusively. He had just came out of a 2 year relationship and wasn't looking for anything serious, but we never had sex. He's 20 and in college and came down and saw me every weekend. I'm 17 and in high school in a different state. After a couple of months he told me that he didn't want to string me along as he wasn't ready for a relationship right now and that we should just be friends for now. Obviously I thought that that was just a line and dismissed him but a couple of months later he started texting me again and asked me to meet up, we did and he explained how he did actually care about me but its just so complicated with him being away. He casually mentioned about us getting together sometime in the future but I didn't put much pass on it. I saw him again the following two weeks but then he had to go back up to college. It's been continuing like that ever since (seeing him every month or 6weeks) he hasn't been in town much but whenever he does he always texts me to meet up. He says he cares about me and that he does miss me and that he will stop contacting me if I feel it isn't fair on me, but that he doesnt want to do that. he says that it annoys him too that we both like each other but that there's not a lot we can do about it until he finishes college. It makes sense, but I can't help but wonder am I just being naive? And should I question his motives more? I would especially appreciate some male insite here!

[zaccarus]

You're not being naive as you're questioning it yourself and if you are being honest with yourself I think that you know the answer. Being 20 was a while ago for me but I would say that he is playing you. Close this chapter of your life and start a new one - you are only 17 & have the whole of your life to live!

[berg101]

I agree with Zaccarus - have you ever heard the theory of being kept on a 'hook' well that is what he's doing to you. Basically it is where a guy or girl strings someone along, giving them false hope that at some stage in the not to distant future they will be together. It's a horrible thing to do but the fact is that nobody likes to feel alone, everybody likes having something that they could always turn to should things go awry.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with keeping in contact with him but I would make it very clear that you are going to see other people and that you can't be expected to wait around until he finishes college for something that may or may not happen.

Hope that helps.

[cheekxs]

If you are questioning him , i think maybe cause he is not to be trust.

This week also i saw a lot of topics of guys doing this shit.
lIKE ACT LIKE THEY ARE HONEST AND WANTS TO BE FRIENDS AND ARE NOT like other guys,
and at a certain point when they got your trust they sex and use you and leave!

I think you are a very smart young person! Cause you ask, you dont just go with the flow!
You are so young, dont waste your time with guys. Especially like this one.
And dont wait to hear what he tells you so you can act.
But look at what you want, and like.

And tell him that straight up! Like if he wants to be friends and you dont, tell him no thank you!

take care!