A Very Shy Girl Trying to Make a Guy Notice Her

[VeryShyGirl]

I'm a girl in my late 20's. Moderately attractive and moderate body type. I'm just a very shy girl and tend to be passive about things.

I had a crush on a guy back in college. Too bad I never got a chance to talk to him because I've always been a very shy girl.

That was 9 years ago. We both graduated, he had moved to a different city (about 2 hours drive) and we both are working in separate places now.

I'd like to start a relationship with him while he's still single, first by making him notice me but I'm not sure how. A couple years ago I found him on Facebook and added him. But we never exchange words.. so I'm thinking it would be weird if I start messaging him on FB out of the blue.

Then I found his professional profile on LinkedIn and added him. This time I said hello, telling him that I was an old classmate and all that. He replied back in a friendly gesture, which I was very happy about. He apologized for not remembering much about me because it was such a long time ago (and the fact that I was such a quiet shy girl that never stood out). Then I replied back to him but since then I receive no more communication from him.. I don't want to send another message because it would make me look 'desperate'. It has been weeks now..

I tried to contact his close friend from FB, in case we get a chance to hang out with his friend. After exchanging a few messages, his friend stopped communicating with me also.

I'm not sure what else to do. Is there a way to make this guy notice me without looking too desperate? Should I be less passive and more confrontational.. I'm actually a very introverted person.


VeryShyGirl

[AdminOnline]

How about try 'poke' him on facebook?

[VeryShyGirl]

How about try 'poke' him on facebook?

I giggled that I just did this now. Hopefully he 'poke' me back... but poking is no communication though. Any other ideas?

[AdminOnline]

'poke' is to simulate a potential conversation ..


next, if he poke back...
send him a message and ask how's his day?

etc

[nobodylovesme]

try asking one of his friends to tell him that you like him. i had the guts to do that before w/ my crush too and now he is my husband. I was really in heaven when he called me and that he didn't even know who i was. Then he became my boyfriend for a year and became my fiance for another year. But the problem is, he changed when i gave birth to our first child. He has a bad attitude and now I regret doing that. But why not give it a try. You know guys are unique and your guy might be different from mine. Good luck girl.

[VeryShyGirl]

try asking one of his friends to tell him that you like him. i had the guts to do that before w/ my crush too and now he is my husband. I was really in heaven when he called me and that he didn't even know who i was. Then he became my boyfriend for a year and became my fiance for another year. But the problem is, he changed when i gave birth to our first child. He has a bad attitude and now I regret doing that. But why not give it a try. You know guys are unique and your guy might be different from mine. Good luck girl.

Thanks for the advice ^^ yes that was actually my intention too when I messaged one of his friends. But it's just my luck now that his friend suddenly stopped messaging me.. :/ that is why I started messaging the guy I like directly. And no luck on that either... >.< I must have said something wrong to both of them, ack.

I'm sorry about your current situation. It seems like your husband might be worried about his newborn baby, like deep inside he feels insecure if he can be a good father or something? Maybe that affects his relationship with you too. But hopefully after some time he will back to his old self.. just give him some time? I wish you and your husband and baby the best..

[warriormaiden]

I honestly feel like going through his friend, in the hopes of him telling the guy you like that you like him, is soooooo Jr.High.

You're a grown up. You're on the internet, which makes these situations easier. Just send a message saying Hi. If he responds back, cool. If he doesn't, he's not interested in anything you have to offer and move on.

(If it would help any, I would also put up a sexy/flirty pic your display avy when you message him. THAT would grab his attention, and pique his curiosity)

[TheGuyWhoWaits]

You should just be straight forward, what do you have to lose?
You can't fall in love if you don't take some risks. As cheesy as that sounds, it's true.
Tell him straight up, and tell him what you want to say, cause if you don't, you'll always ask yourself
what would've happened if you Did.

[haxan]

It doesn't sound like he's very interested or he would've followed up on the LinkedIn contact with you. I'd move on.

Anyway, there's a fine line between being shy and cute and being socially awkward to be around. If your social skills are that poor, work on them a bit.

[VeryShyGirl]

It doesn't sound like he's very interested or he would've followed up on the LinkedIn contact with you. I'd move on.

Anyway, there's a fine line between being shy and cute and being socially awkward to be around. If your social skills are that poor, work on them a bit.

Well I realize my profile in LinkedIn is boring since it has to be professional.. I think I will try again messaging him on facebook. This time I'll change my FB profile pic to something more interesting ~_~

[VeryShyGirl]

OH MY GOD a few seconds a go the guy I like just replied me back on LinkedIn!! Basically he said as a programmer in a big company he's always overworked and didn't have time to reply.. But he told me that I have made a new friend in the city and to let me know when I'm in town to go have dinner with him @__@ and he gave me his phone#

*dances around in the office now*

[Mathias]

OH MY GOD a few seconds a go the guy I like just replied me back on LinkedIn!! Basically he said as a programmer in a big company he's always overworked and didn't have time to reply.. But he told me that I have made a new friend in the city and to let me know when I'm in town to go have dinner with him @__@ and he gave me his phone#

*dances around in the office now*

Wow. This is awesome.

Well done.

[oldskool83]

good job....just be aware of what i saw...."big company he's always overworked" before you get all yippie skippie you need to find out how much time overworked is. could be a clue into his life and issue that may come from the future. Best of luck.

[haxan]

OH MY GOD a few seconds a go the guy I like just replied me back on LinkedIn!! Basically he said as a programmer in a big company he's always overworked and didn't have time to reply.. But he told me that I have made a new friend in the city and to let me know when I'm in town to go have dinner with him @__@ and he gave me his phone#

*dances around in the office now*

Good for you, don't mess it up now :-)

[iamaninnocentma]

he sounds married to me.