This is a story about three boys: Charles, Louis, and myself. Brief background information(drama never gets explained quickly, i apologize):
1. Charles & Louis were dating for about 3 months (they were dating for a year and a half, then broke up for 9 months, then got back together to try to work things out for these 3 months) but they've been living together all during this time Charles' house. Louis, also, was up until February one of my best friends.
2. In March, Charles realized he had strong feelings for me, and I for him, and after a trip together to a wedding where we acted on these feelings, he realized that he needed to end things with Louis as they just weren't compatible and that Louis needed to move out of the house this time.
3. Charles & I continue to see each other occasionally, though we limit our time together because Louis still loves Charles and wants to win him back.
4. It's now 2 months later, and Louis has still not moved out(he's looking, but not very hard, and he is sleeping on the couch). Charles is the kind of person that will give the shirt off his back to someone, even if it means making the situation worse for himself. Furthermore, Louis (rightfully) hates my guts and has gone and dragged all of our mutual friends into this telling them that I am the evil, two-faced ex-friend that is trying to ruin his life.
So here's where we are. Last night, Charles & I went out to dinner during which he revealed that he had got advice from his two best girlfriends on what to do. They thought (and I don't necessarily disagree) that it is just a slap in the face to Louis that Charles & I continue to see each other while A. Louis is still living there and B. while Louis is getting over Charles. Charles has been wanting me to go on more trips with him and spend so much more time together, but he's been having to suppress these desires for Louis' sanity. So Charles came to the conclusion that we should not get dinner again(at least on a one-on-one basis) until he is out of the house, meaning likely not until mid-June. Basically, Charles is realizing that he should have been this firm with Louis' move-out date when it was first brought up in March, and that for that month or so we should have not seen each other as often, but at the time he was worried I would move on and date someone else. But, now that our feelings are growing even stronger for each other, he's thinking that we should give Louis this time now to cope and move out before we DO start doing things like going on vacation together and the like.
To be clear:
-This is not a purely sexual/lust thing. We haven't done the nasty, we've only kissed. There are very strong feelings between both of us; Charles even mentioned that he would love for me to move in once Louis leaves, but he knows that that would be an even bigger slap in Louis' face so we should hold off on any talk of that.
-I understand that what I did was wrong; I tried to apologize multiple times, but it was never received well. Charles doesn't think that Louis will ever be able to forgive me, and I don't blame him. But, I've accepted this fact. I'm almost 26 and this is the first time I've ever done anything of questionable nature in regards to relationships, and Charles is the same way. We obviously are taking a chance on something that we both feel is worth it, and while that may not mean much to Louis, we hope that one day he'll realize that.
To summarize & get to the questions:
I am in a situation where I'm being forced to put my feelings/my happiness on hold for the sake of someone else; Charles & I both are. But, we know that that is the least we can do for Louis right now. At the same time, I'm worried that by not spending time with him for the next month or so, he'll grow apart from me and "forget" about our feelings for each other. Am I being irrational in that fear? Have any of you been in a similar situation? How long did you find yourself waiting? Was it worth it in the end?
Anybody can relate at all? Most of my friends agree that we should hold off until Louis moves out, but patience is not my forte.
Thanks!