Hey guys,
So I'm new to this forum, but it's kinda exactly what I'm looking for. I've just gotta get this off my chest, you don't have to reply, but any responses would be helpful. (: Thanks.
I'm 18 and live in Australia. I'm studying part time and work at McDonalds. I've been working there since September last year and from about the second week I started there, I started falling for one of my managers. I barely knew him at the time and refused to admit it to myself or to anyone else that I did have feeling for him. We had a work function at the start of this year and after that we really started talking. It came up about how I like him and how he'd known for quite a few months now O.o . And things have kinda just gone from there. (We are in NO way involved with each other.) Up until Valentine's Day, I just kept assuming that he didn't return the feeling I had for him and I kept convincing myself of that. Then Valentine's Day comes around and he tells me he does in fact have feeling for me. We've always mucked around at work, just silly little flirty things, but these things seem to have intensified after finding out that his feeling for me were mutual. Just recently it's gotten to the point where we'll be talking and I'll just innocently do or say something and he'll tell me not to do/say it because he's trying to "fight his feelings" for me, but even then that lasts only 5 mins. Everytime we're near each other he seems to have to constantly be touching me - I actually like it and find it nice.
It all seems sort of self explanatory and everything, but there is a problem. He has a girlfriend.. Seems pretty hard to believe after all that right? We talk about them as a couple often. He's not happy with her sometimes but they've been together for a while now and he wants to do the right thing by her and hope that she does the same. A whole bunch of rumors have also started up at work about 'us' so I decided to stop talking to him and to avoid him in general. And it was working right up until a few days ago. I hadn't talked to him for over a week. Then he comes up to me and confronts me about purposely avoiding him, and how I haven't been talking to him, and how I shouldn't have done it and to not do it again. THIS is what sends my mind wurring in spirals. I'm really not sure what to do, I've tried to do the right thing for everyone, but then I get told not to do it. And I hate that having him tell me not to do it, makes my feelings for him intensify. I know that there is nothing going on between us and that there wont be as long as he's with his girlfriend.