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Thread: GUYS!! Do guys like persistent girls? Do you like to be persued?

  1. #46
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    Why do some of us guys still believe that we are "hunters" and women are "prey"? You take that mindset to its ultimate destination and you could very well wind up with this thing called rape.

    On the flip side, the allure brought about by game-playing quickly drowns in a sea of deception, whereas there is no substitute for sheer honesty.

  2. #47
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    woman should just shut-up, sit-back and be grateful to be chosen to receive his seed!



    jk


    if you like a person, doesnt matter if youre the chick or guy, then flirt with them and ask them out. Of course everytime I pursue a guy it doesnt work out like I had PLANNED so Fu(kin A they can come to me. The male gender HAD their chance..

  3. #48
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    I wouldn't like that, if its a no then its a no, go away. And that happened to me .. twice ..

  4. #49
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    Depends entirely on the girl - rather obviously. If she were a stunner, if she were a truly wonderful person, or if she fulfilled even just one of a number of other criteria, that would be brilliant.

    On this broad subject a lady who is a friend of mine going back a few years has spoken on a number of occasions about having a relationship... but I don't want one although I am really not the sort of person who can say 'no' directly to someone whose feelings I want to spare. It would seem really harsh to do so. My method has been to distance myself from her, limiting contact etc.

  5. #50
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    Yes, but not too strongly. Being subtle works on me.

  6. #51
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    I wouldn't mind being chased by a pretty girl, though I doubt it will ever happen at least here.
    If by chance that happens, I would welcome it if I'm also interested. But if I'm not I would tell her softly not to continue.
    I wouldn't act all high and mighty or get too cocky with my friends just because that hot girl is chasing me. It satisfies your inner ego as it does to girls in normal circunstances.
    "E ao imenso e possível oceano
    Ensinam estas Quinas, que aqui vês,
    Que o mar com fim será grego ou romano:
    O mar sem fim é português."

  7. #52
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    Quote Originally Posted by Charlie Boy II View Post
    Guys aren't normally coy. If you get knocked back once, that's it. If you continue to pursue him you'll just end up as the butt of his jokes with his mates.
    Totally agree with what he said!

  8. #53
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    It`s true what Charlie Boy II said, but at the same time, it`s kind of interesting, rare and i wish more girls would do that!

  9. #54
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    Quote Originally Posted by gsusisking View Post
    I mean, wouldn't you like if the roles were switched?! : ) Guys will keep trying to get with a girl they think is pretty, they don't give up! : P Wouldn't you like that?
    Good lord, would I ever!

    I'm sick and damned tired of all my efforts all to which are of no avail! It'd be massively flattering to be pursued!!

  10. #55
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    Quote Originally Posted by GrkScorp View Post
    It's called Toronto, Canada!

    Full of hot women, in competition to get the few hot guys that can be found around the city. If a guy is looking to hook up with major hotties in like one night, (at zero effort), Toronto is the place to be.
    I've been to Toronto at a bar. I was not impressed with the women. The women I talked to were VERY shallow or insecure. Which explains why they are single.

    And yes, I only date women who send me the first msg in online dating. Once they do that, I sort of take the lead from there. It's a test of confidence really. I want to date confident women. But it's also about good communication. If you like me, say so. I tend to like quirky girls, because they are confident enough to be themselves. So don't rule yourself out just because you are quirky.

    I've been pursued by a bunch of women. One time it turned into stalking, after I told her many times I wasn't interested. It started out being flattering. It was unpleasant and a bit creepy after a while.
    Last edited by bulrush; 04-01-12 at 01:59 AM.
    I have a long time interest in psychology, specializing in relationship dynamics for 30 years.
    (Please note, we give the best advice we can based on the information given in a post. For better advice, please include the age of all romantic partners.)

  11. #56
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lulu View Post
    There is a way to keep in touch and be flirty without hard core pursuit being involved. Men like to "win" the prize...make him think that HE won YOU! Otherwise he will just take you for granted. I know this sounds like a game, but from my experience it seems to be consistent with men. It is the MAN'S GAME........
    This is false. Yes, it IS A GAME. And yes, MEN KNOW IT.

    Yes, some men will play along, only to prove a point, e.g. they will "win you", as you so eloquently put it, only to dump you shortly afterwards.

    If you allow me a general remark, if you make this to be a GAME, some men WILL play along, just to make absolutely sure THEY WIN. And what you will end up with is going to be exactly this. A GAME.

    I have done this quite a few times myself.
    Last edited by Sixpacj; 04-01-12 at 04:52 AM.

  12. #57
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    Quote Originally Posted by lahnnabell View Post
    Taking someone for granted can happen regardless. It doesn't necessarily have to do with the early stages of the relationship. Think of all those girls you see on here whining about how to keep their guys happy, when in reality they spend too much time catering to and lavishing attention on their boyfriends. They think that by doting on their boyfriends is the way to keep them content, when in reality, it's the opposite. Guys like to have their independence and have much more respect for a girl who isn't willing to tolerate his BS.

    However, this also starts with mom. If his mom allowed him to walk on her and treat her like a slave, he's gonna do the same to you. Mom is responsible for teaching this young men how to treat their ladies. If she f*cked up, then you'll be responsible for training. I've been there. It sucks.
    Please do not take your personal hurts and generalise them to cover other people. I know I am going to sound rather harsh, so sorry - I am not writing this to score points or be "cool" - but you have deep-seated inferiority issues and it would be better for people coming here if you did not give out much in the way of general advice.

    Yes, doting on boyfriends IS a way to make them happy. YES, they WILL stay in a relationship if they feel happy. And while healthy boundaries are OK, "not tolerating his BS", as so wildly promoted by (Western) media and culture these days, is almost universally construed by women as a licence to be rude. And NO, it is NOT attractive.

    And NO, it is not about mummies.

  13. #58
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    Quote Originally Posted by xxazurexx View Post
    No....they do it and because biologically they are programmed to 'hunt'....
    NO. I will now illustrate why I think this is false.

    If your assumption were true, i.e. that "men are biologically programmed to hunt", this would mean that men "are biologically unable" to have any kind of relationship not based on "hunting". For instance:

    - with their offspring;
    - with their (pregnant) woman;
    - with their parents;
    - with GOD, etc.

    You value as a female to a male is not derived from the fact that "you're running away" and he is "running after you". It is derived from what you can offer "in a relationship" (however broadly or narrowly we choose to define it): sex, affection, love, offspring, companionship. A man wants those things, no the "thrill of the hunt".

    In other words, to paint a different picture, the wolf is chasing a rabbit cause he wants to eat it, not because the rabbit is "running away". Yes, the rabbit is running away cause the wolf is running after it, but not the other way round, the wolf is not chasing the rabbit "only cause it is running away". It is not sufficient to run away to be run after. A rat may run away to its heart's content, a wolf will not chase it.

    So to wrap up, if you want to be "hunted", you have to deliver the goods (or present a reasonable enough chance of doing so), not only "run away", "be mysterious and unpredictable"...
    Last edited by Sixpacj; 04-01-12 at 04:53 AM.

  14. #59
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    Quote Originally Posted by lahnnabell View Post
    Well, not all men have this "hunting" gene. As we see nowadays, there are plenty of lazy boys out there who have no sense of how to provide for themselves, let alone anyone else.

    I think this stems from a lack of proper structure and acceptance of responsibility which is managed by the parents. I've met too many people (boys and girls) who floundered their way through college on mom and dad's dime, never having to work, and yet never really tried that hard to manage their grades, only to transfer when they realize that they won't have enough credits to graduate in their decided field.

    This laziness then spills over into everything else. If you weren't taught to be responsible at an earlier age, it's gonna take you longer to catch up. I've dated guys who were incredibly ambitious career wise, but when it came to cleaning their own dishes or doing laundry, if mom didn't do it, nothing got done.
    And what does the above have to do with whether or not men like women who pursue men? That they like it out of "laziness", out of "lack of responsibility"?
    Last edited by Sixpacj; 04-01-12 at 04:55 AM.

  15. #60
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    Quote Originally Posted by vashti View Post
    If you've already expressed your interest, he KNOWS you are interested. If he is available, but doesn't pursue you, he either isn't interested, or he is a total wimp who wants to act like the girl. That means you will have to be comfortable acting like the boy, which would probably get old fast.
    This (even though this is quite an old thread....).
    'People are never perfect but love can be. People waste time looking for the perfect lover rather than creating the perfect love' - Princess Leigh-Cheri from Still Life With Woodpecker.

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