Can Teenagers be in Love?

[chickyhannah]

as a teenager myself i have been pondering this subject. as a teenager your crushes are very powerful and strong. but can you truely fall in love the same way an "adult" would? i think yes just from personal experiance and especially because ive seen my own mother get all girly and giggly around guys in the same way as a typical teen would. thats my opinion but im curious what you guys think?

[HeartIsAching]

Yes, but it's rare.

For the most part, teenage love affairs are practice for the real thing when you're an adult, but it has been known to happen. My little brother turned 33 yesterday... and he's been happily married to his HS sweetheart since she turned 18.

[Gypsybell]

Yes. It's even possible that youg love is the only 'real' love. or at least the only love that has the extremes of hope, passion and wonder strong enough to alter our paths and build forever on. It all depends on how we manage the course of that love, and how we allow each other to grow within it. It used to be simpler when choices were limited. When we couldn't divorce at the drop of a hat and had to focus on working it out when things went wrong.

The one thing that kept love on the table was fidelity. And no matter how hard we try, once that first love goes bust, the magic lessens with every future partner, guarding of self and conditions creep in. instead of working out problems we change partners and get a whole new set of problems... etc.

But whatever we evolve to, we never rcapture the pure joy and intense feeling of young love, first love. 'Reality' is not the issue, nothing will ever be as real as that first surrender to the need of another person in our psyche. It's not a gift that everyone gets, not to be mistaken for minor crushes every other day. Many don't get bitten by the luv bug early and what they experience is just hormonal desires. Love is to die for, and Shakespeare's romeo and Juliet are not far off the mark. Would they have lasted, you think?

Having said that, I don't actually reccommend it, at least not young marriage. (I was 16) and no, we didn't make it. 45 years later we were 2 strangers standing beside our son's deathbed. Whatever your age, take your time about promising forever.

[bluesummer]

I think so, although your definiton of love changes a lot as you get older. I believe I genuinely 'loved' my first bf when I was 17. He is still someone dear to my heart. However, when I think back about the things that were important to me in a man and a relationship then, they were so much different then than they are now.

[Journey2Virtue]

Love is an emotion with a very strong connection. So if you can be fully capable of truly hating someone, you can't be fully capable of truly loving someone. I think, because they're so young teenagers are not mature enough to maintain and nurture love and the connection that comes with it. Because of that their love is usually unable to obtain the depth and strength that more mature (and usually older) people's love do.

Also, because of their lack of maturity and experience they don't fully understand all the things that come with true love, like commitment, compromise, and communication. Which is part of the reason they can't always nurture their love into something deeper.
But can they love? And is the love real? Sure. why not?

[bcgirl]

Your first love usually feels the strongest because both are naive and haven't felt the heartbreaks yet. When your older, usually most people have been through a few bad relationships and have scars and wounds they carry into their next relationship. They may not believe in love under the context he used to believe in love when he was a teenager. But rather have a more wiser and real definition of love. You'll have lots to learn as you get older and learn more from the opposite sex, relationships and love....but for now, have fun and follow your heart.

[smackie9]

Yes it is possible. I knew the difference even back then...of course crushes are when you are obsessing over someone...ya been there done that. I also met, then dated and fell in love after getting to know them....only two, one at 15 and one at 19. I dated in between, didn't care for after a few weeks to a month.....you know gave them a shot, but nothing grew from it....broke some hearts.

[smackie9]

I learned pretty fast because when finally talking to a crush, and spend a little time with them, they turn out to be not what you had imagined (shock lol) mostly total awkwardness or they turned out to have zero personality....oh those were some funny times.

[smackie9]

Adults that get giddy is usually played up with flirting...it's a way to show one is interested.