Girlfriend's Abuse Issues

[PreservJ]

Hi, I'm a guy and new to the forum

I haven't had many women in my life, but recently I started a relationship with a great girl. We enjoy each other's company, and have a great time together. The problem is that she is sort of unstable and I think it stems from her being raped about a year ago. It affects her greatly and she brings it up from time to time. She was raped by an unknown person after drinking to much. I won't go into too much detail but the creep took her to a hotel while carrying her unconcious.

What can I do to make things better? To let her know she can trust me? I am very caring and giving already, but I fear she may push me away as she has done to other guys because of these issues

[Lover14]

i take it you haven't slept together yet? Just give her time, and keep reminding her that you'd never do anything to hurt her.

[PreservJ]

i take it you haven't slept together yet? Just give her time, and keep reminding her that you'd never do anything to hurt her.

Yes we are having sex, lots of it actually. I hope that giving her time will be enough, I think that rape issues can follow a woman for many years

[vashti]

you can't help her. she needs a professional. encourage her to see one.

[toshiba]

...I think that rape issues can follow a woman for many years

the issues can follow some women FOREVER. Awful crime, I would be in favour of death penalty.

Glad she is able to have sex with you, def get professional help.

[steviej]

Suggest a role play re-enactment!






Err, actually don't.

[PreservJ]

Awful crime, I would be in favour of death penalty.

Let's not get carried away here. No one should receive the death penalty unless they ended another life. The crime of rape is not enough justification to kill the perpetrator

[Wakeup]

Let's not get carried away here. No one should receive the death penalty unless they ended another life. The crime of rape is not enough justification to kill the perpetrator

Would A public stoning be justification enough for your liking?

OP: You can't help her and if she's unable to come to terms with it on her own then encourage her to seek professional help. Did she have ANY therapy at all after this happened?

[PreservJ]

Would A public stoning be justification enough for your liking?

OP: You can't help her and if she's unable to come to terms with it on her own then encourage her to seek professional help. Did she have ANY therapy at all after this happened?

I don't think torture is justified either but that's besides the point

After she was raped, she was given a therapist but chose not to keep attending the sessions. She didn't want to go through with it

[Wakeup]

The problem is that she is sort of unstable

I'll refer you back to post #4 then.

After she was raped, she was given a therapist but chose not to keep attending the sessions. She didn't want to go through with it

You can't do anything to fix her or to help her. I know there is no way you'll do this but you would be doing both her and yourself a huge favor by encouraging her to go back to therapy to help her work through this with a professional and leaving her alone until she's no longer "unstable."

[casanddra]

that is horrible ... I hope she gets counseling if it is destabilizing to your relationship