age 22 and haven't even kissed a girl, please help?

[hot_dragon]

Hi, I have a problem with girls/women, I can't seem to attract anyone, and that leaves me so desperate and frustrating. I'm currently 22 and haven't even kissed a girl, people say that I need to stay myself until I meet that special someone, I don't wanna change myself to attract girls but something inside me tells me that I will never find a girl if I don't.

A little about myself: I'm a bit shy, I may lack responsibility to a low degree, I act a little needy around, I'm not witty, I don't talk much with girls, I'm nice (maybe too nice), I'm the kind of guy that don't get out much

Do you think I should change something about myself or stay exactly that way until I find my special girl?

[blent]

Sounds like you've listed the qualities you don't like about yourself. You've already identified what you need to work on.

[HeartIsAching]

Maybe you're just ugly.

[hot_dragon]

well, maybe your right, maybe I am ugly, but doesn't ugly people deserves someone that love them too

[searock]

Yeah I don't think it's just about looks, "ugly" people find a partner too, if they are charming and have a likable personality.

OP, what do you do in your life? Work, study? Do you hang around with your friends, do you have female friends? What are your hobbies?

[HeartIsAching]

Yeah I don't think it's just about looks, "ugly" people find a partner too, if they are charming and have a likable personality.

OP, what do you do in your life? Work, study? Do you hang around with your friends, do you have female friends? What are your hobbies?

I don't either... sorry, guess I just figured he was a troll.

[Cerby]

Its all about how you play your hand, the cards you're holding rarely have anything to do with the end result.

Your problem is low sel-esteem, and you're in a rut where you think someone special should come to you. There is an old saying "Good things come to those who wait". That saying is complete bullshit. Good things come to those who go out and get them.

Get yourself out in social situations that require you to talk to people, like any other skill, the more practice you have, the better you are at it!

[sadie_genie]

I don't either... sorry, guess I just figured he was a troll.

What makes you think he is a troll?

Anyways, OP, I actually know many guy who are just like you. The problem is they don't go out much. You really need to be more social to meet people. Also, don't be too picky. Be more open to meeting different girls even though you don't think she is your type. The problem with guys like you is that they are severely limiting their choices.

[hot_dragon]

Well, I am currently not a student, and don't work. I don't hang around with girls often, but I do have female acquaintances, and at last, I don't have any hobby, or I have interest but don't have a hobby.

My life is kinda boring when I see it from this angle

[ElectricRed]

well time to make your life interesting. i think you need to find what you need out of life before you find a girl. as long as you're not living the life you want (relationships and woman aside) then you're not going to find a relationship or woman you want.

[searock]

Well, I am currently not a student, and don't work. I don't hang around with girls often, but I do have female acquaintances, and at last, I don't have any hobby, or I have interest but don't have a hobby.

My life is kinda boring when I see it from this angle

Seems like finding a girl is the last of your concerns..! You should work on yourself first. Make yourself happy and satisfied with your life, set goals and work to reach them, keep busy. Hang out with your friends in your free time (which shouldn't be ALL the time), and the chances to meet a nice girl will arise naturally.

[Devilsbane]

I'm no expert here, but let me chime in.

You really need to be yourself. What do you like about yourself? What are you proud of? These are the things that you want to come off in a conversation. You don't want to seem bragging or conceited, but any girl you meet is going to ask you about yourself and you need to be able to say something interesting that gives her the desire to want to know more. Don't lie of course, but a first or second meeting certainly isn't the time to be admitting that you don't think you are witty, are needy, and have a lack of responsibility. Sure, they will come out over time (which is why I said don't lie) but everyone has some stuff they have to get over. Doesn't mean that you need to disclose that on the first meeting.

Have you tried online dating? I definitely have that nice shy guy personality. I really don't talk to girls a whole lot, and for a long time I had trouble with that. The great thing I found about dating sites is because the girls there are actually looking for something (well most of them anyway). Out in the "wild" a lot of girls are just there for the chase and find amusement by screwing with you. I'd advise to try some online dating. You meet online, can exchange those first few words, and if all goes well you can meet up in person.

There are lots of fish in the sea, and 22 is still very young. You have much time in the world to enjoy all the suffering that the rest of us have. (Just kidding... well sort of )