Am I being verbally abused/ bullied?

[angelface01]

I have been with my boyfriend for nearly four years now, we had always got on well together and rarely argued until about a year ago.
About a year ago during a row he blurted out that I had let myself go and needed to lose weight, I admit I was heavy but since last year I am now 10 stone well within the ideal weight range. Over that time he has started comparing me to my twin sister on a number of occasions saying we should be the same size, and that she is more successful than me in her career, this is not true as I have been in and out of work due to tough times with the job market...I have more experience than my sister and hold a HR qualification, I don't doubt my sister she like me had ayears of bad luck with job market a few years ago and I was the successful one at that time, before we got together.

Also, on a few occassions he will yell at me in public, act aggressive and start calling me names, putting me down calling me lazy, stupid which I am not!! I find this disrespectful and he is hurting me.
It hurts me more that last week after we went clubbing with my sis, he started to compare us again, that knocked my confidence even more and esp being unemployed at the moment I have been through hell and I think he is being very cruel. My sis is a size 10 I am a size 12, with half a stone difference. He makes me cry alot an awful lot in public too, he blames me if I havent done something right and it is making me ill

Please tell me if I am being bullied

Thanks
Natasha

[romantic_guy]

Well... YES!! Do you really want to be with a guy (or anyone) who would treat you like that? You deserve better. Show him the door!!!

[Endlessagony]

Yes that sounds very cruel to me, you shouldn't have to put up with that. He probably has issues or possible doesn't love you anymore but is unable to communicate with you. Another possibility is that he's done something behind your back and is trying to justify it to himself in lashing out at you and trying to make you look bad. Whatever it is though I'd say he clearly has communication issues. If you don't want to break up with him perhaps try to get him with you to couples therapy?

[Wakeup]

Why do you stay with this man? What positive actions of love does he show you that makes you think you should be LIFE mates?

[skyliner33]

He sounds like a manipulative SOB. If he is doing what you're saying he's doing, to me it sounds like a no brainer. Let me put it to you this way, if you started talking about your career/weight/ect. with a close friend or family member, how would you want them to respond? Would you expect them to say "you're fat, lazy, useless, and will never compare to your sister?" Your b/f should be no exception.

[Bo]

Doesn't sound like it'll be long til he reaches his 'point' and hits you. LEAVE, LEAVE and kick his ass to the curb.

[HeartIsAching]

Gah!!!

YES, you're being abused. Mentally and emotionally. He's applying this because you've stopped meeting his un-spoken expectations. Next time he compares her to your sister, tell him to go date her instead.

Then walk.

[bulrush]

I'm a guy. Yes, whatever you call it, he is a mean SOB. If you talk about it with him, and he doesn't stop in a reasonable amount of time, then dump him. Find someone who will appreciate you.

What's your height?

1 stone = 14 lbs
10 stone = 140 lbs, a bit heavy

[angelface01]

Hi, I agree with you and I know that there is someone out there who will appreciate me. I am 5ft 4 and weigh 10 stone, well within nornal weight range, I used to be 11.1.

I have spoken to him on numerous occassions but doesn't listen or realise how much this is affecting me, I really believe I am better off single.

[Wakeup]

Hi, I agree with you and I know that there is someone out there who will appreciate me. I am 5ft 4 and weigh 10 stone, well within nornal weight range, I used to be 11.1.

I have spoken to him on numerous occassions but doesn't listen or realise how much this is affecting me, I really believe I am better off single.

When you are in a relationship with someone who you are not suited for then YES, you are certainly and totally better off being single then to stick around to be treated with indifference, verbal abuse and being taken for granted. You didn't have one nice thing to say about this man and you didn't answer the question what keeps you with him, why do you stay with this man?"

You know the answer now just get the strength to break up with him.

[lynmp9]

you poor girl, of course you are being bullied, if he doesnt treat you like a princess he is not worth it. How dare he compares you with your sister, do you compare him with anyone? you deserve far far better

good luck

[Wakeup]

good lord!