Fetish's (whats normal, what isnt?)

[surfhb]

He doesnt think I am his OWN MOTHER. He pretend I am his mother but not to mimic his real mother. Like his actual mother has nothing to do with this, he doesnt even like her as a mother lol

Whatever.....thats not what Im asking. Other than his fetish bothering you, is he a great guy?

[Wakeup]

First off, everything you say to me is no help. And yes when he told me I was relieved and I am a happier person then before. Before I thought our sexual issues were my fault, now I know its something he cant control that is psychological. Makes me feel a hell of a lot better. Mind you I do have issues with him thinking it everytime we make love. That is my only issue with it!

Well don't read my posts then. If I'm of no help to you, However; You were sexually unhappy before you knew and you're not much better now that you do. Your last post totally indicates as such.
It seems the only reason you're happy he told you because your ego can now rest knowing that it's not you but it's him. Get counceling. I know I would because looking up (or down) at someone who I know is fantasizing about an older mommy figure will be a hard thing for you to overcome ~ as you already know.

If you don't want to go to counceling then do some research, look for kink forums so that you can get some advice from woman who can relate to you and can perhaps give you mental exercises in how to accept and become inaffected by this.

[alexandraboo]

ALSO, Can anyone really comment this legitly without biased comments without actually experiencing having a fetish that affects you in a way like this? why should anyone judge, I simply came on here to find out if any of you men have the same issues? or something similar. Yes, it was to feel better about the current situation, NO it was not to be insulted or judged. I am pretty sure I accept it to the point that it doesnt bother me as much now, I know he cant help it. I know he isnt lying to me. It has been a long struggle with the porn thing, I was so upset he had to look at other older women other then me, now I understand, I diddnt understand or fulfil his fetish before, he had no outlet for it. Its a huge weight of my shoulders it wasnt me who was not good enough, or my attractiveness. Ever since he has told me he has been so loving and awesome to me, flattering me, telling me how pretty I am. I have never been happier then in the past few days, this year has been hell.

[alexandraboo]

Whatever.....thats not what Im asking. Other than his fetish bothering you, is he a great guy?

Yes he is, he is the most amazing man I have ever met, and I love him with all my heart.

[James Banes]

Yep...it sure did hit a nerve. I despise judgmental pricks like yourself...So you're judgmental and have low reading comprehension ? Like I said, if its between 2 consenting adults....it doesnt matter what you or I think. So, again, Go **** yourself!

What if I do go **** myself? I'll still be a judgmental prick who thinks people like you are sick and don't belong in my clean neighborhood.

With that being said, you should remember the OP wasn't consenting. Otherwise, she wouldn't have made a thread voicing her concern. You're the one with reading comprehension. You're also the type of internet bigshot who doesn't dare talk big on the street.

First off, everything you say to me is no help. And yes when he told me I was relieved and I am a happier person then before. Before I thought our sexual issues were my fault, now I know its something he cant control that is psychological. Makes me feel a hell of a lot better. Mind you I do have issues with him thinking it everytime we make love. That is my only issue with it!

Sadly, for you, you have no idea if he's thinking about his mom whenever he gets aroused. He could be saying, "Oh Alexandra!" but be thinking, "Oh Mommy! Mommy!"

He's a good father, huh? I've heard stories about guys addicted to the barely legal porn who download porn that look like their teenage daughter, and, occasionally son. That fetish is about as widespread as mommy fetish.

[alexandraboo]

Well don't read my posts then. I'm of no help to you, However; I suspect I'm no help because you are in denial. You were sexually unhappy before you knew and you're not much better now that you do. Your last post totally indicates as such.
It seems the only reason you're happy he told you because your ego can now rest knowing that it's not you but it's him. Get counceling. I know I would because looking up (or down) at someone who I know is fantasizing about an older mommy figure will be a hard thing for you to overcome ~ as you already know.

If you don't want to go to counceling then do some research, look for kink forums so that you can get some advice from woman who can relate to you and can perhaps give you mental exercises in how to accept and become inaffected by this.

Thanks sounds like a plan, I am not in denial, I am but I'm not.... Its weird.

[alexandraboo]

What if I do go **** myself? I'll still be a judgmental prick who thinks people like you are sick and don't belong in my clean neighborhood.

With that being said, you should remember the OP wasn't consenting. Otherwise, she wouldn't have made a thread voicing her concern. You're the one with reading comprehension. You're also the type of internet bigshot who doesn't dare talk big on the street.


Sadly, for you, you have no idea if he's thinking about his mom whenever he gets aroused. He could be saying, "Oh Alexandra!" but be thinking, "Oh Mommy! Mommy!"

He's a good father, huh? I've heard stories about guys addicted to the barely legal porn who download porn that look like their teenage daughter, and, occasionally son. That fetish is about as widespread as mommy fetish.

What does this honestly have to do with this at all, What sickos in your neighbourhood? I worked at a sex store, NORMAL people have fetish's and strange sex likes. Sick people? So every second person is sick? Wow you should move to a recluse island alone then, because you will never be able to escape all the "sick" people.. Ooooo.

[James Banes]

ALSO, Can anyone really comment this legitly without biased comments without actually experiencing having a fetish that affects you in a way like this? why should anyone judge, I simply came on here to find out if any of you men have the same issues? or something similar. Yes, it was to feel better about the current situation, NO it was not to be insulted or judged. I am pretty sure I accept it to the point that it doesnt bother me as much now, I know he cant help it. I know he isnt lying to me. It has been a long struggle with the porn thing, I was so upset he had to look at other older women other then me, now I understand, I diddnt understand or fulfil his fetish before, he had no outlet for it. Its a huge weight of my shoulders it wasnt me who was not good enough, or my attractiveness. Ever since he has told me he has been so loving and awesome to me, flattering me, telling me how pretty I am. I have never been happier then in the past few days, this year has been hell.

I'll answer your question again: yes, other men have the same issues. There are amateur porn women who cater to that fetish because men like your guy like that sick shit.

So there. I've answered your question. I hope you feel better now.

[alexandraboo]

Oh and james bane, I am consenting to sex with him with his fetish, it isnt like he is raping me against my will? Where in this post have I said, my boyfriend with a mommy fetish raped me and pretended I was his mommy. I play along most times, and most times it turns me on to be honest.

[James Banes]

What does this honestly have to do with this at all, What sickos in your neighbourhood? I worked at a sex store, NORMAL people have fetish's and strange sex likes. Sick people? So every second person is sick? Wow you should move to a recluse island alone then, because you will never be able to escape all the "sick" people.. Ooooo.

I'm willing to understand some fetishes. But mommy fetish? Gross. A line simply must be drawn when it comes to fetishes. What kind of guy who is right in the head would get turned on by his mom?

[Wakeup]

Oh and james bane, I am consenting to sex with him with his fetish, it isnt like he is raping me against my will? Where in this post have I said, my boyfriend with a mommy fetish raped me and pretended I was his mommy. I play along most times, and most times it turns me on to be honest.

Well, then you've answered your own dilemma so there was really no need to ask a Vanilla Forum Board about a very specific question about a kink that not too many would be able to relate to the way you want us to. Nor would many want to admit to having simply because people do judge. It's a fact of life and every Opening Post that is started, no matter what it's subject ~ It will be judged and replied to by how it is judged.

Good luck, I hope you can keep yourself happy with this man.

[James Banes]

Oh and james bane, I am consenting to sex with him with his fetish, it isnt like he is raping me against my will? Where in this post have I said, my boyfriend with a mommy fetish raped me and pretended I was his mommy. I play along most times, and most times it turns me on to be honest.

Hey, lemme read you bits and pieces of your original post:

I have told him I accept it and that its no big deal. But the thought of my boyfriend this obsessed with something like this really gets to me, I think about it often and I am not sure what I can do to alleviate the bit of bad feelings about it I have left.

So you consent to have sex with this fetish then have bad feelings afterward? Doesn't sound like a healthy sex life to me.

The obsession is a bit out of control I would say, If he has to think about it all the time, and look at porn about it all the time, I cant help but think when we are making love, that is what he is thinking of me.

You even admit his obsession is out of control and he has to look at porn all the time. Yet you wanna act like things are okay?

I was just wondering if there is any guys here with a strange fetish like this, and how harmful it can or is to a relationship. What is he thinking? He holds back a lot, I always thought he was very secretive, now I know why. He was petrified I wouldn't accept him. Don't get me wrong, I love him more than anything. He means the world to me, I just need to get over these ill feelings once and for all to better our relationship.

You admit the fetish is strange and it gives you bad feelings but now you're saying it turns you on most of the time? How is that possible?

Do you think its unhealthy that he has to think about me being his Mom every time we have sex, not only that but an older women, I feel he is not even wanting me, just a body to act out his fantasies sometimes. It really hurts. He showed me the videos that turned him on, some older woman pretending to be his mommy in a video, touching herself and what not. He thinks it was a mistake to show me, I don't, because now I understand a little more

It really hurts? Then obviously you are consenting to fulfilling a fantasy that hurts you emotionally. That's not as bad as rape, but not insignificant either.

P.S I am not leaving him or giving up on him. He is my absolute lover, I really know I want to be with him for the rest of my life. I just need something to calm my mind about it. How normal is this type of fetish!?

Alexandraboo, you are hilarious!

Your first post sounded like a distraught woman, who was disturbed by your man's fantasies. But when posters started passing judgments you now act like you love it, "It turns me on most of the time! I love my it when my man thinks of his mother when he's banging me! Wheeeee!"

If this isn't a clear case of reverse psychology I don't know what is. If people keep passing judgments, you'll keep defending your man and start saying you love it. Then it'll hit a breaking point and you'll do a complete 180 and love the fetish yourself.

Sigmund Freud would have loved you and your weirdo boyfriend.

[alexandraboo]

Hey, lemme read you bits and pieces of your original post:


So you consent to have sex with this fetish then have bad feelings afterward? Doesn't sound like a healthy sex life to me.

You even admit his obsession is out of control and he has to look at porn all the time. Yet you wanna act like things are okay?

You admit the fetish is strange and it gives you bad feelings but now you're saying it turns you on most of the time? How is that possible?

It really hurts? Then obviously you are consenting to fulfilling a fantasy that hurts you emotionally. That's not as bad as rape, but not insignificant either.




Alexandraboo, you are hilarious!

Your first post sounded like a distraught woman, who was disturbed by your man's fantasies. But when posters started passing judgments you now act like you love it, "It turns me on most of the time! I love my it when my man thinks of his mother when he's banging me! Wheeeee!"

If this isn't a clear case of reverse psychology I don't know what is. If people keep passing judgments, you'll keep defending your man and start saying you love it. Then it'll hit a breaking point and you'll do a complete 180 and love the fetish yourself.

Sigmund Freud would have loved you and your weirdo boyfriend.

I am trying my best to accept it and love him for him.

[James Banes]

I am trying my best to accept it and love him for him.

You already do accept it. You said it in your other post:

I play along most times, and most times it turns me on to be honest.

[James Banes]

LOL...no she didnt. wanted to have sex with your mother and a women who is old enough to be your mother are 2 different things.



Hes fine.....totally normal.

Respectfully.......Go **** yourself! If its between 2 consenting adults its perfectly healthy- for them. Talk about assumptions

I also wanna express dismay at the above poster. First surf uses sarcasm to express his disgust for the fetish. Then, when I agree with him, I get told to go **** myself because it's perfectly healthy all of a sudden.

Both surf and alexandra need psychiatric help for their mood swings and constant changes of opinion.