I need advice: I want to date a shy guy friend (I'll call him ShyGuy) and we're both single in our late 20's. I'm not sure what to do: Here's the background:
We both worked together a few months ago on a temporary project in a different company, the project ended and he's unemployed and I'm working elsewhere now. He's shy, he doesn't talk much. I'm the opposite - I'm extrovert, very friendly and talk a lot. We went out for beers after work in our work group a few times on the project (always with other people). In the group conversations he says he wants a girlfriend and talks about marrying in the foreseeable future. He's not a player. He was mildly flirting with me and some other single girls, which is fine because he's single and looking for a girlfriend. One night some months ago we went out and we were talking about our types and I said pretty much he was my type and another guy friend who was with us, who is a good friend of Shyguy, dropped hints that ShyGuy wanted to sleep with me in front of Shyguy which I didn't pick up on. Another time ShyGuy was trying to impress me. We went out on several more occasions in a group.
I was under the impression he was attracted to me but was shy, but maybe he just likes me as a friend only? He's not chasing me now.
My feelings grew for him over the 2 months and when the project was coming to an end I knew I really liked him, so I sent him an email suggesting we get it together after the project ended. I was nervous about this because despite the fact that I have an extrovert personality, I'm shy around guys I like. Anyway, he was a bit shocked I think and I was embarrassed. The email was very basic ie the project is coming to an end - do you want to get it together after it finishes? something like that. I ignored him out of total embarrassment and regretted sending the email, but felt I had to know one way or the other, but he made an extra effort to talk to me. We both pretended as if I never sent the email. When the project ended he said he definitely wanted to stay in touch (he said that without any prompting from me). This was 6 weeks ago. Since the project ended I have sent group emails to our work group suggesting meeting up and he's turned up to one event - we both act as just friends. I have sent him about 4 emails/texts spread over a month as one time he was ill, another time I gave him advice about job-hunting etc. He never replied to the emails/texts.
We were due to meet up a few days ago as part of a group and he gave his apologies the day before we were due to meet up, ie cancelling for a better option in a group email. I then emailed him individually suggesting we could meet up in the next few weeks. So far no reply.
Do I assume he just wants to be friends only and is happy to meet up once a month only in a group setting? I want to date this guy. He knows I'm attracted to him. I can't read the signals. Please advise me honestly. Usually when guys like me, they are calling me and suggesting meeting up. He's not doing that. It might be because he's shy or he's now unemployed and has no money. He's a nice kind caring person who happens to be a single guy. Guys - tell me what you really think and what should I do. I think he likes my personality, I'm just not sure whether it's just as a friend or whether he expects me to chase him or get the hint he doesn't like me that way. He knows I'm a kind person.
It's only been about 3 months since I've known him, do you think I have to know him more as a friend before he makes a move? Should I give up on him? How do I make him like me? Do I try and ask him about the email I sent him? Would that be embarrassing? Incidentally, that would make me look an idiot as I'm guessing he would come out with some lines like he just wants to be friends, hope that's okay, which would be awkward for me making me look like some lovestruck idiot, whereas a few months ago he was flirting with me and I was ignoring him, which he knows.
Thanks.