True love vs. Lust

[ladycb5988]

Ive been dealing with this topic for awhile and i really want to hear everyone's opinion on TRUE LOVE VS. LUST. I believe that we all go through a period of settling for the wrong type of relationship that consists of nothing but pure lusts but by the emotions it can feel as though your in love. But i strongly believe that TRUE LOVE will last forever! you will know true love when you have it! its something you cant hold back! i myself thought i was in love at one point in my life but now realizing how things it was purely lust....but just wanted to know how you guys felt about this. Do people fall in love then all of sudden fall out? or is that just pertend love? ex: my ex and i broke up and a few months later he had a child with another girl. i dont think its that easy to just move on to the next person if you truly love someone it wouldnt be so easy to move on and get caught up in dreadful situations.

[Hth]

I agree that true love won't be that easy to forget. There are many guy told me that they couldn't forget or want to have another relationship for years. So, when I told them my ex had another gf after 6,7 months( after a 2,5 years relationship), they said this guy is NOt worth it and assume that he didn't love me as I thought, or else he cant mOve On that fast, impossible. And I agree, I have realised that guy was just a waste of time. A true bastard. If he has another gf after some months, put in your mind that the guy doesnt worth your time, heart, whatever. They didn't love you in the first place.

I don't know how it is in other countries, but some guys stay single for years, or can't forget the person that they insist that it's true love till old. It means they have a wife but it's only for responsible with their parents( get married and have kids), but the flame about the person they love is still in their heart.

True love is not easy to find, it must come from both sides, it won't be easy or impossible to forget..... If anyone fall in love with the wrong person who didn't worth it, they can force themselves to forget, takes time...

[ladycb5988]

this is exactly how i feel!!! i believe that you should take some time before moving onto the next person unless your just looking for love in the wrong form which is through pure lust and not finding real love! but you will know when you have it!! thanks for commenting!! :0

[moosegal]

True love vs lust ... interesting concept ... true love will last forever whether you are with that person or not. Lust is always a short lived gratification .. burns hot and quick. My real true love and I moved on and married other people. Many years later when we see each other .. the feelings are still there but we are apart. He is happy with the life and wife he has ... I have had many loves but none as deep. There is nothing wrong with lusty relationships ... we are only on this earth a short time. Life really is about experiences and if you can't have true love, why waste your life for nothing? Don't be afraid to find happiness, regardless how short or log it last. My opinion ... true love and lust .. both equally good.

[inexistent_love]

Following is love as i see and hope it provides an aspect of love you may consider or at least tell you how someone on this earth sees it. It's going to be too long though because it's in the form of a letter I wrote to my love, who didn't read it and will never do.

"What is love? I see you taking aback by the gravity of the question. Are you really expecting to find an answer for something baffled humanity all along and is yet to fall on the magical definition? was your sarcastic response. Well darling, who said I was looking for what humanity thinks, all I wanted was to know your own thinking and nobody else. With all due respect to the rest of the universe, all I care for is you and only you. Besides, you speak about humanity as it represents one entity with identical desires, properties, needs, thinking, beliefs and feelings. Have you noticed the crescent tonight? couldn’t you see it changes seat with the change of yours? You could in one night enjoy its warm look, if you cared for some warmth, on your left, right and even before you, merely influenced by your own angle and only yours. At the same moment the spellbinding shine could be reflected to many other sights from completely different skies. And assuming true the universe is one; then in your heart I would equal my competition, wouldn’t I?

Since you insist to wait humanity’s consensus and since I can’t wait, let me tell you what love is! Not forgetting of course it doesn’t represent but own experience. Why would I care to know your view, all I cared always for was your competition and none else? Yes darling, I am very well aware of the fact; however until my competition, all of them, come up with one, it wouldn’t hurt to hear a ready one, made up especially for you in order to have something to compare with when time dictates such comparison. Remembering too I would never care to be the winner of best definition, assuming there could be such one. Why? Because at then I would have lost despite the outcome, therefore you wouldn’t mind listening to a loser just for a purposeless fun at least. But haven’t I heard your futile fun hundreds of times already? No darling, what you have known so far was yourself, ever since I have been defining you for both you and myself. I remember very well your ridiculing words of such definition, and in spite of my words putting you on a pedestal, I had lost, which partly explains the prophesy. By the way, I have never done such thing of putting you on any pedestal; all I did was to put you in the place you had deserved and for you to reject to acknowledge my heart’s placement is totally understandable. Being the only one, in your earth, to promote you to the highest acme, I must be the one wrong and not everyone else!

I thought you were interested in my definition, yet I see you now offering yours, be consistent for once at least, will you? Hopefully this going to be your last objection before hearing what I have for you today! Well, it doesn’t matter who says what, don’t entwined souls look at life from one angle? even though on one, of them, alone the burden lays to carry the twosome nearest to that acme. So, are you tired objecting every claim I make? then relax and listen to my claim of what is love. I like to say first what is not love, and no I am not escaping the task I assigned myself voluntarily. In order for my mind to identify something, it has to cast aside all the seemingly similar objects by testing their unlikely probability until proven otherwise.

Physical attraction is certainly not love and no this isn’t that boring cliché or idealistic philosophy that you hear sometimes, or an attempt to sound a perfectionist to gain any favour in your heart. I hope you don’t get shocked from the coming admission, however to clarify my point I have no other choice but say it. It happened, at times that I got physically attracted with no love or a trace of it ever felt for my heart to claim it as such, whereas in your case the sole emotion that had invaded same heart was something in the least unknown, completely mysterious and unheard of before. In the first case wasn’t an issue for the heart to recognize and contain, merely straightforward feeling where pure sensation would be the first name the mind settles on without having to contemplate then brush off as, even though, enthralling still inexplicably extraterrestrial. The most difficult task this mind had ever undertaken was to come to an agreement with the heart on a something worldly parallel that could be used as a reference point for a reasonable comparison. Long time and extensive efforts it took to point finger to the real object. You would wonder and say; ok if it was not sensational feeling then it had to be love, either one or the other, what is the alleged confusion for? In fact this was the strangest thing; love was never a suspect in this simple equation. Unthinkable, even in my wildest dreams, was to either get attracted physically to you or fall in love with you. As I said many times before, satisfying the eyes via external look had been the starting point to convince my heart to consider searching what is behind. Again this is not to diminish your fine look. My mind, due to a flaw in its make, unfortunately fails to believe in anything less than the perceived outstanding, and even an unsatisfactory image painted by an outspoken mirror has failed to erase the conflicting criteria drawn within irrational lenses. Hence you can appreciate the anxiety and unease my heart had suffered in order to solve the mystery in you. Perhaps it was neither a good explanation nor convincing to conclude love and sexual desire are unrelated, yet you have proven it to be the case.

Is love a gravitational force towards an appealing object that occurs regardless of sensual need? If it was the case, it would have had to occur at the initial encounter from the first glance. Since it wasn’t the case, I can presume that love and appeal have no connection. This must be an out of whack conclusion! You whispered to yourself. As it has been indisputable fact this type of love and doesn’t exist who hasn’t, at some point in life, felt its force. Let me remind you that I don’t deny some form of affection at first glance, however my own conclusion it could be anything but love and we have agreed on seeing love from our angle while forgetting the rest of the universe, haven’t we?

Is love an emotional need? Emotional need is a by-product of love and not love. The heart has to feel love first while emotional need for someone happens next, what comes first dictates the relationship title, we don’t feel an emotional need for someone we don’t love, do we? When I saw you first and for long time thereafter, I had not felt any need of any type, rather I spent the months that elapsed, until the moment of truth, on deciphering the atypical waves transmitted from your heart throughout the surroundings.

Is love a selfish phenomenon? Life is too sad and gloomy with the absence of mutual emotions, and very depressive it becomes if the other side has not experienced the same; each wants to be loved as much. Well, I have never cared even for a single second to receive something in return, my sole interest had always been to let you know what you represented to me, and in fact I enjoy a lot the reality of one-sided love. If it was a mutual one, I won’t be able to display the power of mine. If the two sides posses a comparable strength, they counterbalance each other, neither is going to appreciate the great emotion of the other. Only the weak is capable to feel the strength of the opposite side. In the end would be needless to explain how I feel since you do feel a similar one!

Love is sensing a heavenly existence of oneself inside another. The above forms are true facts of daily life and denying their forceful prevalence is like refusing to admit self existence. Their power is extracted from an earthly nature with earth a fertile soil to grow into forests that can hardly allow rays of love to break through and establish self as a parallel force that would help soul restore nature as a soaring balloon to defeat weight, and pull the body up to where it could see reality from a higher world without having to break self into body and soul. Love is a proof that a more beautiful form of myself is existent on earth. Strange that witnessing a higher form of myself embodied in another is not a reason for envy and denial. Rather falling onto a better copy of myself gazing at me through your eyes triggered the best feeling ever. Is it possible to forget the best of me or cease to love and write to? wouldn’t this be a word of death on my existence?

This explains the baffled state of my mind when it had encountered your phenomenon and the inability to fathom it. It wasn’t easy for it to believe the probability of seeing self-image while not facing a mirror. Together with an enormous affection filled my heart gradually for you; I had to wonder the spooky nature surrounding you. Finally it was a matter of one shocking instant to recognize the one hiding underneath you"

[Jazzersize]

Love is lust wrapped up in bullshit. Get your rocks off while you can, marry the best you can as you begin to age.

[simmo]

tierney?......

[bulrush]

True love will not last without action. Love is built with actions, you give them something they like, like a surprise card or flowers, and they give you something that makes you feel loved. You have to do this almost every day. Skipping a day here and there is ok.

But I find that the more I fall in love with someone, the more intimacy and sex I want with them. You might say my lust increases for them. So now we have, in my case, love and lust building on each other. Plus our trust of each other grows, as we grow as people. As we try new things, we support each other in our growth. Someone supporting me in trying new things I have not had in a relationship before and it's wonderful, along with the love, and passion. It's just a great feeling.

If it's easy for BOTH of you to speak their "love language", then you have a good chance of making it.

If you are interested in my $1 Kindle ebook, PM me. It could really help you a lot. It defines the elements of a successful, happy relationship.

[maxmax]

Love is just another four-letter word ... as is lust.

They'll both get you ****ed in one way or another.

[Cerby]

Following is love as i see and hope it provides an aspect of love you may consider or at least tell you how someone on this earth sees it. It's going to be too long though because it's in the form of a letter I wrote to my love, who didn't read it and will never do.

"What is love? I see you taking aback by the gravity of the question. Are you really expecting to find an answer for something baffled humanity all along and is yet to fall on the magical definition? was your sarcastic response. Well darling, who said I was looking for what humanity thinks, all I wanted was to know your own thinking and nobody else. With all due respect to the rest of the universe, all I care for is you and only you. Besides, you speak about humanity as it represents one entity with identical desires, properties, needs, thinking, beliefs and feelings. Have you noticed the crescent tonight? couldn’t you see it changes seat with the change of yours? You could in one night enjoy its warm look, if you cared for some warmth, on your left, right and even before you, merely influenced by your own angle and only yours. At the same moment the spellbinding shine could be reflected to many other sights from completely different skies. And assuming true the universe is one; then in your heart I would equal my competition, wouldn’t I?

Since you insist to wait humanity’s consensus and since I can’t wait, let me tell you what love is! Not forgetting of course it doesn’t represent but own experience. Why would I care to know your view, all I cared always for was your competition and none else? Yes darling, I am very well aware of the fact; however until my competition, all of them, come up with one, it wouldn’t hurt to hear a ready one, made up especially for you in order to have something to compare with when time dictates such comparison. Remembering too I would never care to be the winner of best definition, assuming there could be such one. Why? Because at then I would have lost despite the outcome, therefore you wouldn’t mind listening to a loser just for a purposeless fun at least. But haven’t I heard your futile fun hundreds of times already? No darling, what you have known so far was yourself, ever since I have been defining you for both you and myself. I remember very well your ridiculing words of such definition, and in spite of my words putting you on a pedestal, I had lost, which partly explains the prophesy. By the way, I have never done such thing of putting you on any pedestal; all I did was to put you in the place you had deserved and for you to reject to acknowledge my heart’s placement is totally understandable. Being the only one, in your earth, to promote you to the highest acme, I must be the one wrong and not everyone else!

I thought you were interested in my definition, yet I see you now offering yours, be consistent for once at least, will you? Hopefully this going to be your last objection before hearing what I have for you today! Well, it doesn’t matter who says what, don’t entwined souls look at life from one angle? even though on one, of them, alone the burden lays to carry the twosome nearest to that acme. So, are you tired objecting every claim I make? then relax and listen to my claim of what is love. I like to say first what is not love, and no I am not escaping the task I assigned myself voluntarily. In order for my mind to identify something, it has to cast aside all the seemingly similar objects by testing their unlikely probability until proven otherwise.

Physical attraction is certainly not love and no this isn’t that boring cliché or idealistic philosophy that you hear sometimes, or an attempt to sound a perfectionist to gain any favour in your heart. I hope you don’t get shocked from the coming admission, however to clarify my point I have no other choice but say it. It happened, at times that I got physically attracted with no love or a trace of it ever felt for my heart to claim it as such, whereas in your case the sole emotion that had invaded same heart was something in the least unknown, completely mysterious and unheard of before. In the first case wasn’t an issue for the heart to recognize and contain, merely straightforward feeling where pure sensation would be the first name the mind settles on without having to contemplate then brush off as, even though, enthralling still inexplicably extraterrestrial. The most difficult task this mind had ever undertaken was to come to an agreement with the heart on a something worldly parallel that could be used as a reference point for a reasonable comparison. Long time and extensive efforts it took to point finger to the real object. You would wonder and say; ok if it was not sensational feeling then it had to be love, either one or the other, what is the alleged confusion for? In fact this was the strangest thing; love was never a suspect in this simple equation. Unthinkable, even in my wildest dreams, was to either get attracted physically to you or fall in love with you. As I said many times before, satisfying the eyes via external look had been the starting point to convince my heart to consider searching what is behind. Again this is not to diminish your fine look. My mind, due to a flaw in its make, unfortunately fails to believe in anything less than the perceived outstanding, and even an unsatisfactory image painted by an outspoken mirror has failed to erase the conflicting criteria drawn within irrational lenses. Hence you can appreciate the anxiety and unease my heart had suffered in order to solve the mystery in you. Perhaps it was neither a good explanation nor convincing to conclude love and sexual desire are unrelated, yet you have proven it to be the case.

Is love a gravitational force towards an appealing object that occurs regardless of sensual need? If it was the case, it would have had to occur at the initial encounter from the first glance. Since it wasn’t the case, I can presume that love and appeal have no connection. This must be an out of whack conclusion! You whispered to yourself. As it has been indisputable fact this type of love and doesn’t exist who hasn’t, at some point in life, felt its force. Let me remind you that I don’t deny some form of affection at first glance, however my own conclusion it could be anything but love and we have agreed on seeing love from our angle while forgetting the rest of the universe, haven’t we?

Is love an emotional need? Emotional need is a by-product of love and not love. The heart has to feel love first while emotional need for someone happens next, what comes first dictates the relationship title, we don’t feel an emotional need for someone we don’t love, do we? When I saw you first and for long time thereafter, I had not felt any need of any type, rather I spent the months that elapsed, until the moment of truth, on deciphering the atypical waves transmitted from your heart throughout the surroundings.

Is love a selfish phenomenon? Life is too sad and gloomy with the absence of mutual emotions, and very depressive it becomes if the other side has not experienced the same; each wants to be loved as much. Well, I have never cared even for a single second to receive something in return, my sole interest had always been to let you know what you represented to me, and in fact I enjoy a lot the reality of one-sided love. If it was a mutual one, I won’t be able to display the power of mine. If the two sides posses a comparable strength, they counterbalance each other, neither is going to appreciate the great emotion of the other. Only the weak is capable to feel the strength of the opposite side. In the end would be needless to explain how I feel since you do feel a similar one!

Love is sensing a heavenly existence of oneself inside another. The above forms are true facts of daily life and denying their forceful prevalence is like refusing to admit self existence. Their power is extracted from an earthly nature with earth a fertile soil to grow into forests that can hardly allow rays of love to break through and establish self as a parallel force that would help soul restore nature as a soaring balloon to defeat weight, and pull the body up to where it could see reality from a higher world without having to break self into body and soul. Love is a proof that a more beautiful form of myself is existent on earth. Strange that witnessing a higher form of myself embodied in another is not a reason for envy and denial. Rather falling onto a better copy of myself gazing at me through your eyes triggered the best feeling ever. Is it possible to forget the best of me or cease to love and write to? wouldn’t this be a word of death on my existence?

This explains the baffled state of my mind when it had encountered your phenomenon and the inability to fathom it. It wasn’t easy for it to believe the probability of seeing self-image while not facing a mirror. Together with an enormous affection filled my heart gradually for you; I had to wonder the spooky nature surrounding you. Finally it was a matter of one shocking instant to recognize the one hiding underneath you"

I don't blame her for not reading this, is a dry novel with little content.

[searock]

If one starts seeing somebody else "soon" after a break-up from a long term relationship, it doesn't necessarily mean that they were never in love with the person they were in the relationship with. Yet they rationally accept that they are no longer together with them, and see no reason why they should stop themselves from seeing somebody else.

[muddblood]

Love. I've had true, deep, passionate, head over heels love only twice in my life; my first true love was in highschool, some 17 years ago. You probably won't beleive me, but time actually stopped the first time I saw her (what a feeling THAT was). We dated for a wonderful 1 1/2 years, but then the relationship ended. I still think of her to this day and I will till the day I die. I even tried remaining friends with her which never really worked out until about 15 years later when we started emailing each other. This is true love. We emailed eahc other for 2 years, but I was finally able to let go of her when I fell in love for the second time in my life - with a co-worker of mine some 18 years after my highschool sweetheart left me. I truly believe I will never ever forget either of these wonderful women.

Lust. The woman I married, and never was in love with. She is extremely interested in sex, and can get it 2-3 times a day everyday and never tire of it. Even though I knew there severe lack of feelings, on both parts really, I thought it's be cool to have someone I can have sex with anytime I want, as much as I want, and try new and different things and places with, but lust just isn't fullfilling. After 16 years in what feels like a loveless relationship/marriage, we are rapidly heading for divorce because I am craving that true deep love I've felt (and currently feel) only twice before.

Basically, true love does never dies but lust does. Hope my ramblings help.

Here is a post that I was advised to read about loving someone and being in love with some and I think kinda it applies here. Being in love with someone is how I felt those 2 wonderful times. Loving someone is how I feel about my wife.
[url]http://www.loveforum.net/ask-female-forum/58560-loving-someone-vs-being-love-them.html[/url]

[inexistent_love]

I don't blame her for not reading this, is a dry novel with little content.

The fact you read till the end says it did attract you or you won't finish such a long message unless you like to torture yourself reading dry novels and for this you can only blame yourself and not the writer of such nonsense. .. Second ..you don't understand what you read even though you read the whole thing. She doesn't read because she never received the letter, not because what you like to conclude based not on what was written, rather what pleases your brain to understand. Let me quote myself again "Well darling, who said I was looking for what humanity thinks, all I wanted was to know your own thinking and nobody else. With all due respect to the rest of the universe, all I care for is you and only you. Besides, you speak about humanity as it represents one entity with identical desires, properties, needs, thinking, beliefs and feelings" In any case, difficult to take serious someone judges based on lack of facts and not their existence.

[Hth]

Love. I've had true, deep, passionate, head over heels love only twice in my life; my first true love was in highschool, some 17 years ago. You probably won't beleive me, but time actually stopped the first time I saw her (what a feeling THAT was). We dated for a wonderful 1 1/2 years, but then the relationship ended. I still think of her to this day and I will till the day I die. I even tried remaining friends with her which never really worked out until about 15 years later when we started emailing each other. This is true love. We emailed eahc other for 2 years, but I was finally able to let go of her when I fell in love for the second time in my life - with a co-worker of mine some 18 years after my highschool sweetheart left me. I truly believe I will never ever forget either of these wonderful women.

Lust. The woman I married, and never was in love with. She is extremely interested in sex, and can get it 2-3 times a day everyday and never tire of it. Even though I knew there severe lack of feelings, on both parts really, I thought it's be cool to have someone I can have sex with anytime I want, as much as I want, and try new and different things and places with, but lust just isn't fullfilling. After 16 years in what feels like a loveless relationship/marriage, we are rapidly heading for divorce because I am craving that true deep love I've felt (and currently feel) only twice before.

Basically, true love does never dies but lust does. Hope my ramblings help.

Here is a post that I was advised to read about loving someone and being in love with some and I think kinda it applies here. Being in love with someone is how I felt those 2 wonderful times. Loving someone is how I feel about my wife.
[url]http://www.loveforum.net/ask-female-forum/58560-loving-someone-vs-being-love-them.html[/url]

You should not have married her if you didn't feel love but lust. But I agree in most of your post about love, lust. Love is impossible to forget, but lust will fade very fast after the honeymoon stage wears off.

[Cerby]

The fact you read till the end says it did attract you or you won't finish such a long message unless you like to torture yourself reading dry novels and for this you can only blame yourself and not the writer of such nonsense. .. Second ..you don't understand what you read even though you read the whole thing. She doesn't read because she never received the letter, not because what you like to conclude based not on what was written, rather what pleases your brain to understand. Let me quote myself again "Well darling, who said I was looking for what humanity thinks, all I wanted was to know your own thinking and nobody else. With all due respect to the rest of the universe, all I care for is you and only you. Besides, you speak about humanity as it represents one entity with identical desires, properties, needs, thinking, beliefs and feelings" In any case, difficult to take serious someone judges based on lack of facts and not their existence.

Oh no, let me assure you I did not read the entire thing, or even close to it. Secondly, you sound like you've got an ego big enough to cart around in a wheelbarrow, you're over-use of moderately sized words followed by the assumption that those who read it don't fully understand it tells me all I need to know.

She wouldn't have read it even if she got it.