Why hasn't she texted me back?

[anth11]

The thing is, some of my friends agree that it's really weird that she just stop all communication with me. My friend who's worked and known this girl for a long time was the one who suggested the flowers thing because he saw her reaction when her sister got flowers from some guy and said it was the sweetest thing ever. That's why I did it. Can you understand now?

She was the one who suggested another day to hangout in the week, it's not like I had too...We went on a couple dates, hangout once a week because she's so busy. This is exactly why I don't know what to think. I just want to know the reasoning of what's happening

Do you think she'll eventually talk to me or is this for permanent? I know it's completely wrong, but I'm thinking about asking her sister what's going on.

[oldskool83]

people are only busy for the people they dont want to spend time with. ive seen people so busy making time for me, also seen the other hand. she has no guts to face you in person and say she either doesnt like you or shes not ready. sucks cuz it happens, but thats her problem for not being able to open her mouth. dont make it yours.

[anth11]

I know, but it sucks a lot worse because I've invested 2+ months in this and it's another waste of time.

[oldskool83]

and i burned 3 months living with a woman and her child to be put into situation and only receive a text a few times a month and all my shits at the girls house too. take the time out just focus on yourself. somthing will pan out, time off from women is ok, you can think clear and get some things done maybe you've always wanted to do. work out, work on yourself, work on cleaning your car, appartment or house or somthing like that.

just acept its not you, your trying to talk but shes gone MIA, at sum point she will pop back and appologize for it, normaly its too late.

they make new women everyday, just always remeber that. i do understand your situation reason for actions you've taken. give her the treatment she gave you.

[cloud10]

sounds like you scared her off or she got something going on the side? 5 days seems to be ignoring someone especially if you had those kind of interactions before she went away for 2 weeks.

[anth11]

I was previously in a 6 year relationship and a year later I had a hard time trusting women and here she comes again in my life and I thought for a good reason and she's messes with me. I might have scared her away but it's not like she didn't say or do things that lead me on..I was just going off the vibe I got from her.

But now that I really think about it we both talked about how we needed maturity and to take things slow but now I'm starting to think it was my fault and it sucks a lot more not knowing or knowing it is.

[anth11]

Well here's an update: My friend asked her sister why this girl wasn't texting me back and she said "I don't know I don't really talk to her that much, why doesnt he ask her?" Told her the reason and she she'd ask her. Well I called her at 7:30 and got her voicemail. 9:30 comes around and I said something else to her and she finally responds and says:

"Sorry I have not gotten back to u for a few days. I am having some health and personal issues going on right now that are making it very difficult for me to have this relationship with u and I am so sorry for that. I am not trying to hurt u and do not want to nemore. It's not u at all its totally me and I do not want to distract u u from school right now. I just need some time to get thru and work some things out. I know this is not the relationship u wanted and how I have been is not fair to u. I hope we can be friends and hopefully I can get everything straight and we can really have the relationship we should. For now can I please have some time ..I don't want to hurt u nemore?"

Me:

"Reading all of that makes it seem like it's a way out. It's either you want to be with me or you don't, I need to know the truth."

Her:

"I do want to be with u but I think I'm trying to say is I have a lot going on personally and i'm not giving you the fair attention that I should and the relationship we both want. I know how hard your major is and I do'nt want to distract u from it by worrying about us. I just need sometime to handle a few things and I'll be much better and the flowers were so sweet!

Me: I'm old enough to handle things and I want to be with you, but I need to know that you do too."

Her:
Okay well let's take it one day at a time if that's okay...I just have some things going on..I'll work on it and u satay focused with school..

Yeah so that was obviously a nice way to let me down. So I'm just going to move on. If one day she wants to contact me she can, but judging by that, she has no interest.
What kills me is that I asked for the truth and she still says she wants to be with me. But the truth thing she did say is her health. She left one of our dates early cause she got sick and she does have a history of it. But I know what you guys are going to say but I figure I'd say it anyways. I'll just move on.

[oldskool83]

kinda how my g/f is being with me, reason i decided to say screw it ill do what i want. just focus on what ya need to, let the rest come as it comes. people like to do the run bount it seems with people who they know have had it ruff in the past but honestly its easier just said and done up front, either she wants to peace or not.

[Mike588]

Yea good idea. Don't contact her in anyway!!!! She knows how you feel. If she really wants to see you she will call.

[surfhb]

You obviously are way too deep emotionally for such a short relationship. Shit happens sometime and weve all been there. Take things slow next time so your not all worked up. Don't ever contact her again unless she calls you!!! Repeat! Do not contact her again!

Good luck!

[anth11]

Ok, so my birthday is next weekend and I'm having it at a bar. I'm friends with her sister and I invited her, so should I just not invite her or should I?

[searock]

You can casually tell her sister "oh your sister can come too" or something, but I don't think you should invite her directly. I mean, if you tell her sister that, it should be like, to show that you've gotten over her and you don't really mind whether she comes or not, rather than a desperate act to get close to her again.

[ladiesfirst]

Give it some time--it you keep sending her texts, she might start to feel pestered. Wait a while and try again so you don't seem desperate.

[jb1111983]

Nothing wrong in inviting her for your birthday but make it very very casual. And do not contact her again after this. Be friendly whenever you see her the way you'd with people you know but talk of nothing personal. And don't initiate any contact with her at all like you're ok even if you never get to see her again. Sometimes this makes her curious and want to see you. Like Surfhb, I repeat don't initiate contact.