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Thread: Why won't anyone date me?

  1. #1
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    Why won't anyone date me?

    I'm 17 1/2 and never had a boyfriend. To be honest, I don't consider myself attractive. If you ask me what am I on a scale of 10, then I would say 4. I'm around 101 and like 5'2. I know that there are guys out there that likes me, but I'm just not that into them. I like guys that are a few years older then me, you know like around 21ish. I've met a few of those guys and none of them seemed to be attracted to me. Oh, by the way, I don't wear makeup at all. Is that a problem? Since school is starting in a few weeks, I want to make myself prettier so that guys I have a crush on will like me. I'm sorry, but I am insecure about myself. I'm not the girly type of girls, I play basketball and games. Another of my friend who is a very girly girl got asked out by college students like 3 times already. Is that really a problem, to be more girly? I know that it is not because I am too young, because I am not. My friend is even a month younger than me. So what is the problem here? Do college guys really like girly girls that wear makeup more?

    Sorry if this is too long, I'm kind of ranting along the post too. I've just talked to one of the college guys I know and he told me something I don't want to hear. He say that I'm too young for him, but I know for a fact that I'm just not pretty enough.

  2. #2
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    When i was your age I had no problem attracting the attention of guys around the age you're after. I wasn't a girly girl, but I wasn't a sporty chick either. Yes I wore make up and yes I wore skirts. I had a lot of guy friends and was generally treated like one of the guys, but I think the make up and the skirts helped. I never considered myself all that pretty as a teenager, I had a shaved head at one point, and a mowhawk at another point. As a teenager all my boyfriends were either skaters or musos.

    So uh, advice. Do learn how to use make up. I rarely used anything more than eyeliner and mascara but it was enough. I'm also suggesting this because when a time comes when you need to wear make up, you'll know what to do to achieve the look you want.
    Find guys to hang with that share your interests. You'll appear a lot more attractive to guys that share your interests than guys that don't.
    Good luck.
    'People are never perfect but love can be. People waste time looking for the perfect lover rather than creating the perfect love' - Princess Leigh-Cheri from Still Life With Woodpecker.

  3. #3
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    O.P Post a pic
    Also if your a 4/10. Maybe look for a 4/10 guy. You may have set your sights too high.

  4. #4
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    I honestly doubt she is a 4. I don't know a single chick that rates herself as high as guys would rate them.
    'People are never perfect but love can be. People waste time looking for the perfect lover rather than creating the perfect love' - Princess Leigh-Cheri from Still Life With Woodpecker.

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by Riko2011 View Post
    I like guys that are a few years older then me,
    Yeah, everybody does. If you think you're so unattractive (4), why do you insist on pursuing the more attractive guys who have a chance to date more mature people?

    Oh, by the way, I don't wear makeup at all. Is that a problem?
    Most guys don't care about it, I think. Perhaps you should try being flirtier?
    You can't buy love, but you pay heavily for it.

  6. #6
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    To be honest, I don't consider myself attractive. If you ask me what am I on a scale of 10, then I would say 4.
    Dont rate yourself,the ratings will change since people will have different views...

    You can also post your picture here so that you can observe the views of many people...
    Another of my friend who is a very girly girl got asked out by college students like 3 times already.
    These college students may date with your friend for time pass....so you should be happy that you werent used by these people...Dont underestimate yourself
    Oh, by the way, I don't wear makeup at all. Is that a problem?
    Its good that you are not hiding your originality....
    By the way,men wont like the girl who do over makeup to attract...I am surprised that you are not falling in to that kind of category....
    Currently on my way to Cloud Number 9.....

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by rafterman View Post
    O.P Post a pic
    Also if your a 4/10. Maybe look for a 4/10 guy. You may have set your sights too high.
    I agree all the way with this.
    Post a pic or accept a 4/10 guy.
    To be or not to be?

    Is that the question?

  8. #8
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    I'm betting that part of your problem is your insecurity and self-image. I think it's quite likely you're far prettier than a 4.

    Some guys really DO like women that don't wear makeup. My wife almost never does, and prefer it that way - I wake up with a woman that looks like the one I went to bed with.

  9. #9
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    It doesn't matter to me if the girl wears makeup or not. I actually do not like heavy makeup on a girl. I also tend to like tomboy-type girls. And yes, self-confidence is a major attractor to me. Right now, if they are self-confident, I'm more attracted to them regardless of their looks.
    I have a long time interest in psychology, specializing in relationship dynamics for 30 years.
    (Please note, we give the best advice we can based on the information given in a post. For better advice, please include the age of all romantic partners.)

  10. #10
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    It's not all about the looks. I find it terribly unattractive when someone is insecure so the first thing you should change is your attitude. Find the formula that makes you feel good about yourself. If you feel that makeup would make you prettier and therefore more confident, try it. If you like yourself there's a bigger chance others will too.

  11. #11
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    YOur problem is your confidence. Rating yourself a 4 is evidence of that. Also some people are late bloomers. I was awkward until I was 23. Maybe you are one of these people

  12. #12
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    Don't you worry my friend. there comes a time when you'll start to chase Younger men. better not to set your standards too high...
    "It's all George's fault. All that talk about impotence. He got to me. And that orgasm stuff: orgasm this and orgasm that. It's a lot of pressure!" Jerry Seinfeld

  13. #13
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    I agree. It sounds like a confidence thing more than anything. Don't change who you are. If you don't want to wear makeup, don't, but be happy for who you are. You are still very young, Mr. Right will come along, guaranteed. He may be a "4" to some, he may be a "10" to some, but if you like him for who he is and he likes you for who you are, scales are meaningless. What you don't want is to be treated like a piece of meat and thrown to the curb. Guys who are out looking for the dolled up, scantily dressed girls I'd say are more likely to not stick around and will likely treat you like garbage. Find someone who likes you for who you are. If they don't, then you probably don't want to be with them anyways.

  14. #14
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    I'm not the most attractive girl in the world-I'd say I'm pretty average looking- and I have never worn makeup and don't really wear dresses/skirts but I have never had trouble getting a boyfriend. I think the one thing I do have is confidence and you seem to be lacking in that. Don't wear makeup if you don't want to- do you really want to go out with someone who only notices you for your makeup and not your personality? Be who you want to be, don't change for anyone.
    P.s. I see you are just a couple of inches taller than me...I'm pretty sure most guys find short girls cute
    Last edited by lazyblue; 10-08-11 at 07:38 AM.

  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by lazyblue View Post
    ...I'm pretty sure most guys find short girls cute
    Not ones with confidence and insecurity problems. No older, attractive guy is going to want to date someone who looks down on themself, confidence attracts confidence, as long as she is the way she is, she'll only be able to get guys with similar problems.
    "All is fair in love and war." - Francis Edward Smedley

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