What do men in relationships really think when watching porn?

[tremolo]

I believe we have.

[Wakeup]

double speak... pfffft!

[Stillits]

I have come to terms with my bf watching porn and have suggested we watch some together sometime.
However, I'm in a long distance relationship and our sexlife when apart happens over webcam. Recently he told me that he also watches live cam girls. I don't know but that really crosses my boundary that he would watch those women and then watch me through a webcam too. It feels wrong and I can't quite come to terms with him watching some girl rubbing herself live. Maybe I'm just overthinking it? He says it's variety and just mindless but one could use the same excuse if he was sex camming with some other girl he knew, right? Meh, I don't feel like doing anything anymore on a webcam with him as he can just as well go watch some professional do it.

[Wakeup]

he told me that he also watches live cam girls. I don't know but that really crosses my boundary

Ugh. That would cross our relationship boundaries as well. That's interaction with someone he could possibly meet up with and it's the first step in cheating as far as I'm concerned because there is a chance of an emotional connection and an emotional affair taking place. In video or mags... an emotional connection is impossible. There's the difference.

He seems to have a problem. He has every right to do it, he just wouldn't have the right to do it and keep me as well.

[smackie9]

Ugh. That would cross our relationship boundaries as well. That's interaction with someone he could possibly meet up with and it's the first step in cheating as far as I'm concerned because there is a chance of an emotional connection and an emotional affair taking place. In video or mags... an emotional connection is impossible. There's the difference.

He seems to have a problem. He has every right to do it, he just wouldn't have the right to do it and keep me as well.

Ya I agree with this...live web cam chats with girls is legalized prostitution. Web chat is very personal and emotionally intimate....

This typical of posters....they only let you know what's going on, on the surface, but in time the nasty details start to come out. Sorry GF your guy is a jerk, and if you want an normal loving rleationship, you best be finding someone who is worthy of your love.....dump his ass for it's not going to get any better.....

[smackie9]

Thank you for being upfront about it. In my opinion, most guys would rather be used for sex instead of relationships whenever possible; and, from that perspective, could find women are being disingenuous when engaging in forms of sexual "monopolism" or sexual "prohibition" when the reverse is usually not true for them.

Consider the analogy to monopolies in Commerce and anti-trust forms of legislation to correct for that lack of giving the "customer" what they could be getting, but for that lack of "competition" because it does not usually lead to "better products at lower prices", simply because of the social transaction costs involved for men in obtaining those "products and services" from other women; whenever money is not involved.

So you are implying that the majority of guys are emotionless, are unable to fall in love and would choose sex over love? Yes not every guy is looking for a relationship, but there are ones who are...you are being very narrow minded due to your experience with making poor choices. It's not about the guy, it's about the girl who chooses the wrong guy.

[ctr916]

I have come to terms with my bf watching porn and have suggested we watch some together sometime.
However, I'm in a long distance relationship and our sexlife when apart happens over webcam. Recently he told me that he also watches live cam girls. I don't know but that really crosses my boundary that he would watch those women and then watch me through a webcam too. It feels wrong and I can't quite come to terms with him watching some girl rubbing herself live. Maybe I'm just overthinking it? He says it's variety and just mindless but one could use the same excuse if he was sex camming with some other girl he knew, right? Meh, I don't feel like doing anything anymore on a webcam with him as he can just as well go watch some professional do it.

Why do you feel that way if You still have a relationship with Him?

[ctr916]

Ugh. That would cross our relationship boundaries as well. That's interaction with someone he could possibly meet up with and it's the first step in cheating as far as I'm concerned because there is a chance of an emotional connection and an emotional affair taking place. In video or mags... an emotional connection is impossible. There's the difference.

Why do women claim to have a problem doing something that is expected of guys to do?

[ctr916]

So you are implying that the majority of guys are emotionless, are unable to fall in love and would choose sex over love? Yes not every guy is looking for a relationship, but there are ones who are...you are being very narrow minded due to your experience with making poor choices. It's not about the guy, it's about the girl who chooses the wrong guy.

How did you reach that conclusion? In my opinion, women who claim they are my friends should not be unwilling to use me for sex until I clamor for a relationship, even if it is with someone who may be in a better position to help out.

Why should a woman making the wrong choice be any more difficult than a guy making the same wrong choice?

[Wakeup]

Why do women claim to have a problem doing something that is expected of guys to do?

Why do you assume everything?

[Stillits]

Why do you feel that way if You still have a relationship with Him?

Well, he only told me this 4 days ago and I am still contemplating what to do.

[ctr916]

Why do you assume everything?

It wasn't an assumption, I was merely taking your word for it and applying it across genders.

That's interaction with someone he could possibly meet up with and it's the first step in cheating as far as I'm concerned because there is a chance of an emotional connection and an emotional affair taking place. In video or mags... an emotional connection is impossible. There's the difference.

[ctr916]

Well, he only told me this 4 days ago and I am still contemplating what to do.

Do you believe you could be a girl friend to him?

[Wakeup]

This response:

Why do women claim to have a problem doing something that is expected of guys to do?

Does not coincide with this statement:

That's interaction with someone he could possibly meet up with and it's the first step in cheating as far as I'm concerned because there is a chance of an emotional connection and an emotional affair taking place. In video or mags... an emotional connection is impossible. There's the difference.

You, therefore are assuming something. What that something is, will only ever be known to you because you have an inability to coherently share your thoughts.

[Katmeow85]

I'm so fed up with feeling I'm not good enough. I try and try to make him want me. Initiate things and nothing. I'm feeling like I want to leave as I wouldnt feel this way. I may hurt for a while but it just feels like he doesnt want me sexually and it is really hurting me. He must be bored of me. He says he isnt but hes said alot of things.