Now there's a question ... but why? :-/
Now there's a question ... but why? :-/
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About what, exactly?
Haha. Hormones?
Same reasons men do?
We don't really change our minds that much. Sometimes, we pretend to so we can test your conviction.
Men and women don't misunderstand each other because we're too alien. We misunderstand each other because we fail to communicate. Even if my wife does something inexplicable, I KNOW that if I ask her, she'll tell me why, and I'll understand why she did it, even if I don't agree.
I think it's more that women are on the fence and guys decide it's a definite yes or no. Then the woman actually decides and it ends up being the opposite of what the guy assumed. With some of my boyfriends maybe, I don't know, eh, ask me in a little while... etc... all equaled yes with no room for doubt or if they were a negative person with no self esteem everything equaled no except the most ecstatic yes. Occasionally an actual "no I do not want to" got taken as maybe or yes.
What you just described is a failure to communicate. Like I said.
And you can reverse the words "men" and "women" in your sexist blathering and still be just as true.
See, here's the thing - my wife and I have had this conversation... if I'm not sure what she means when she says something or vice-versa, we ask. Period. If she asks my opinion on something and I say "I don't care, either way", that means that I seriously don't care, and vice-versa. Did it last night when picking out a movie to watch... she asked, I said "Whatever you want." That meant that I had no strong desires in that area. Mostly what I wanted to do was cuddle with her and eat dinner with some entertainment on... and that's what I got. Makes for a stress-free and REALLY FRIGGIN' EASY TO MAINTAIN relationship.
Last edited by HeartIsAching; 01-07-11 at 09:22 AM.
Now I do have a husband who I can say those things and he takes them at face value or asks if I truly don't care rather than assuming whatever I said means yes or no instead of what it actually does. I was just pointing out that a lot of guys do that assuming and then complain women are changing their minds when they never actually agreed or disagreed to something in the first place. I've seen it in every other relationship of mine and every relationship of my sister's and while it can happen in reverse it does tend to lead to guys complaining about it more than girls. I see girls more frequently complaining that the guy won't make a decision or give an opinion because they won't except less than a specific yes/no answer.
I do it coz I am a naturally indecisive person. I also tend to go with the flow. So if I had plans but decided I didn't want to do that particular thing anymore I'd just do something else. I am ALWAYS changing my mind. I just go with what feels right at the time.
Some people are drains and some are radiators... Keep clear of the drains and hug the radiators!