Who belives in a second chance relationship?

[itsmyd3stiny]

Maybe people with past experiences can answer this too?

Say if this is your first breakup and you are the person that got dumped, you're in pain... however after going NC u find yourself again..

If your ex contacts you again during this time (when you are no longer in pain) and asks u to be back together? what would u do? be friends and try again? or keep NC?

[Horseyguy]

I guess it really depends on a lot of things.

Especially why you were dumped and how the realtionship was etc.

If you are completely over them and don't have feelings for them and don't want to get back with them then friends is an option, but that would only work if neither of you wanted anything else but friendship

Stay NC if you don't want to remain friends and have no intent or getting back together

But if you still have feelings for them and believe trying again would stand a chance then you can go for that.

My experience has taught me second chances don't normally work out so I tend to keep ex's as ex's, saying that my current ex has contacted me to say she would like to try again once she has sorted out some issues she is dealing with but my gut is telling me to not go there, really based on the way she treated me when we were together, so I'm not feeling really inspired to try again but I might leave it 6 months and see if the friends route works because I do actually like her as a person, she's just a crap girlfriend.

But I am friends with one of my ex's and that works out fine, we keep in contact every 6 months or so and have been for 4 years now.

[smackie9]

Ya the circumstances does make a difference. I dated a guy that suckered me into not breaking up with him only for him to break up with me 2 weeks later. He didn't want to be the one dumped. 3 weeks later he came around to the club where I worked and asked me if I wanted to go back out with him again. I laughed in his face and said absolutely not! He was shocked because all his exes always said yes. I figured it out if he can't find someone new he just goes down the list of exes to see if he can score. What a loser.

[itsmyd3stiny]

I guess it really depends on a lot of things.

Especially why you were dumped and how the realtionship was etc.

If you are completely over them and don't have feelings for them and don't want to get back with them then friends is an option, but that would only work if neither of you wanted anything else but friendship

Stay NC if you don't want to remain friends and have no intent or getting back together

But if you still have feelings for them and believe trying again would stand a chance then you can go for that.

My experience has taught me second chances don't normally work out so I tend to keep ex's as ex's, saying that my current ex has contacted me to say she would like to try again once she has sorted out some issues she is dealing with but my gut is telling me to not go there, really based on the way she treated me when we were together, so I'm not feeling really inspired to try again but I might leave it 6 months and see if the friends route works because I do actually like her as a person, she's just a crap girlfriend.

But I am friends with one of my ex's and that works out fine, we keep in contact every 6 months or so and have been for 4 years now.

Yeah it has been very complicated relationship... maybe it is best for me to stay with NC... i guess even if a person say that they will change, they cannot change their personality... and it will always be that way

[itsmyd3stiny]

Ya the circumstances does make a difference. I dated a guy that suckered me into not breaking up with him only for him to break up with me 2 weeks later. He didn't want to be the one dumped. 3 weeks later he came around to the club where I worked and asked me if I wanted to go back out with him again. I laughed in his face and said absolutely not! He was shocked because all his exes always said yes. I figured it out if he can't find someone new he just goes down the list of exes to see if he can score. What a loser.

Sorry to hear that.. but yes i agree with u, he's definately a loser..

My ex is different though.. im sure she's not like that...

[Cerby]

They just don't work. I've tried two second chance relationships (and once almost a third chance). Both time the second chance was shorter, much more stressful, and ended much worse than the first time.

[fuchsia_bee]

sometimes second chance relationships do work. it depends on your attitude and on how badly you want your lover back. people do change...believe me. if you want some other advice try this [url=http://www.myexbackcode.com/]The easy 7 steps code to getting your ex back[/url] it's really good and maybe it will help you 2. best of wishes and good luck

[confusius]

I have never gotten any second chance. But from what I heard people say so far, some work some don't. It really depends on many factors. What were the reasons of the breakup? were you comfortable in your relationship? Are you ready to change for your partner? Is your partner ready to change for you? I think the list could go on forever, but it really depends on whether you want it or not?

I would take my ex back if she comes back to me. I learned from my mistakes with her and I will love to use what I learned to make it work with her. But maybe with time I won't want her anymore. But if she comes back to me I won't make it easy for her. I'll set up the bases for the relationship. I will love her with all I got and work hard to make it work, but I'll take it slowly. If first time I gave my heart to her in one month, it will take me a year to completely gave her my heart again and that will depend on my factors such as how I'm feeling the relationship.

I heard couple stories of people who got back together. Some even got married. My parents tried several times it didn't but theirs was very complicated. On the other hand, my ex's parents broke up when they were younger. And then my ex's mom moved from WV to DC. The dad didn't let go. So many years later they are married and have two daughters. I think my ex's grandparents split up many times too and nearly killed each other. But they stayed together.

Seriously it can go either way but it tents to go to the negative one.

Best of luck

[Horseyguy]

well I can't see it happening with my ex unless it is a couple of years down the track and she really does sort out her issues first.

She has some underlying demons which are causing her to drink and not sleep and until she sorts them out we wont have a chance. She thinks once she cuts down on the drink, gets over the death of her dog and starts sleeping a litlle better she will be in a much better space for a relationship. But all I see is the next traumatic thing that happens she will start having problems sleeping again, start drinking to cope and will push me away again. She thinks her only problem is her drinking but there is a lot more going on than just that.

And anyway I think it's way too soon to try again. I'm still miffed at the way she treated me when we were together so I'd have problems trusting her right now.

[Cerby]

...I'm still miffed at the way she treated me when we were together so I'd have problems trusting her right now.

Yours and mine both.

[kamazaki]

i do before but now i just dont know dude...