Am I liked by people? Or am I kidding myself?

[pianoplayer]

Hello... This is kinda long... the main questions are towards the bottom (12345)... but the body is my story... please read (both if possible.) and sorry about the grammar

I am confused about something. I can't figure out this crap... I'm not saying I'm naive... I'm just confused...

Ok... I'm a HS senior (male) (a few months left... YAY!!)

Anyway, i guess you could say i was always the one who had (has) to make everything a joke. I'm not a class "clown", but i definetely try to be a comedian... and that's how its always been. I can crack up a joke and get the whole class bursting in laughter. I know one thing for certian... EVERYBODY THINKS IM FUNNY. and what's wrong with wanting a little bit of positve attention... nothing

however, maybe sometimes i do take it too far. sometimes i get a litlle bit perverse (not THAT perverted though... I dont use nasty words and vulgarity... I just make "puns" and stuff). and yes, sometimes i do annoy others. and people do get annoyed, for sure. but they always talk to me. and laugh hard at my jokes... but if a person were to classify me, they wouldnt consider me "annoying"

now, there will be days where kids will just sorta ignore me. when they are with their friends, they will sometimes just pretty much say "f off." in so many words.

but then when i talk to them alone, they are the nicest people. but when they are with freinds, they are asses. and thats normal snobby behavior, and thats their own problem, not mine.

but then I get these weird things... things that i can't figure out. Like the other day... a friend of mine...

i talk to her all of the time, and she pokes fun at me. (and she's not snobby, she's a christian)

but the other day, i was walking by her in the hall, RIGHT by her, and i said "wazzup" and she just kept looking straight ahead like she was pissed... WTF???

then, i talk to people online, and it seems like whenever i IM them, they instanly sign off.. like "im not talking to that fag" and then sometimes they talk to me for hours.

even some friends of mine... I'll IM them... "wazzup" and then it all of a sudden says "joe blow signed off at 2:20"

it pisses me off. Somedays people chat away with me... somne days people treat me like crap... and it can be very hurtful.

also, one more thing... i am one of those "Nice people" i am a Christian, and i don't think anyone's seen me be an a-hole.


also, i should say... many people think I'm cute... and i always see chicks staring at me in the halls/etc. Could that have anything to do with it?

am i too hot too handle (i wish...)

So, to sum it up, 5 questions...

1. Could me being a Christian make people mad? (I don't care if it does, though... just curious) If so... WHY???

2. Could making everything funny make people mad?

3. Could being "annoying" make people mad?

4. Could not being "fit with the norms" make people not like me? because i am probably one of the nicest people at my school... is that what it takes? BEING NICE? becuase that's what makes ME like people...


so Why do I feel disliked when i know i am?

I also want to ask one more thing.... I am a sunglasses person. I love to wear sunglasses. inside, at night...etc. my friends call me "hollywood"
i have a new pair of mirror sunglasses, so no one knows where my eyes are. (it is school spirit week at my school, so i wore them the other day.)

and i saw many chicks staring at me all day long in the halls.. and the glasses aren't THAT extreme, if you know what i mean.

5. So, were these chicks staring at me becuase of the glasses (they thought i was looking staritght when i was looking to the side)
or were they staring at me becuase i am hot? would YOU stare at the opposite sex, merely becuase they had glasses on?

any advice?

[bluesummer]

Hm. How to answer this.
Its hard to tell you what exactly is making people treat you the way they are, seeing as we don't know you personally. It could be just fickle teenaged behaviour (best friends one week, next week you're enemies...wtf), or it could be that you are extremely hyper sensitive and are reading way too much in the way people act. Just because a person is super friendly to you one day doesn't mean they hate you.....maybe they're having a shitty day and you just happened to say 'wazzup' at the wrong time...who knows.

I knew a few guys in hs who acted a lot like you describe yourself...outgoing, always trying to get a laugh, wearing strange things to school. Nice guys, but honestly there's some days where you just felt like saying to them "Can you just be serious or chill the f$%* out for one second?" Not everyone wants to be 'social' 24-7, and there's times that humor or the whole 'class-clown' thing is obnoxious and not appropriate. Check yourself from time to time. Be yourself, but don't go overboard because you think you won't get any attention or that people won't like you if you're not constantly 'on', f you know what I mean.

[pianoplayer]

yeah, i hear ya... i take nothing seriously, and my parents get pissed because of it. I hardly ever get pissed, unless there's a reason (if you read the post on this site "dating books" you know what i mean)

anyway, the chick i said hi to... i think she has a crush on me. there are times when i don't act like a jackass, but i don't act like a jack ass around her. i act normal

but here's the thing... i kidd around with her bro. a lot. i (jokingly) say to him, he your sis. is hot... i like your sis... i'm gonna be your bro. in law... etc. but he knows im joking. so maybe he said something to her.. but would that make her reject me? probably not... she is by far the most outgoing chick i've ever met.. she is more annoying than me, and doesnt give a damn about people judging her.

so why did she do that to me? is it a "hard to get" thing. i don't really like her, but im just tryuing to figure it out. (and she was in a good mood that day.)

and the chicks that stare at me... i don't even know them... they just stare. Could it be the glasses... if a person had mirror sunglasses on at your HS, and you didn't know them, and it was "sunglasses week", would you actually stare at them? the shades weren't outgoing... they were more "cool" if you knwo what i mean.

and you say... don't read into everything... if you were doing the scientific method, would you NOT gather the details? that's what investigation is all about...

LET's make this a discussion... like post after post after post.... if you want

[Laguna]

1. Could me being a Christian make people mad? (I don't care if it does, though... just curious) If so... WHY???

I doubt it could make any difference. It really shouldn't. But, a lot of people base everything on your beliefs. Considering you said they still talk to you. Someone who takes religion into consideration would never talk to you, not now and then. So, this isn't the problem.

2. Could making everything funny make people mad?

Yes. This is your biggest problem. People in this world take things different ways. Some find it funny, some find it rude or obnoxious. You see, i'm also a comedian. I play off what people say, but I also watch myself. Like, if I go to say something that might offend some people, I either stop or I twist it around so they realize that it's just a joke. I never really think about this. My mind just knows when and what to say. I'm the type of guy that dosn't think about making a joke, I just play off what goes around my environment.

3. Could being "annoying" make people mad?

This might be another reason why they could be mad sometimes. Sometimes people just like to flow through their day and the worst thing that happens to them is some kid annoys them. People have on and off days. You have to notice when someone has an off day and just let them be. Like, I talk to girls and crack jokes and stuff, but if I see a girl looks not well, I go up to her and say hey are you alright, etc. I take it seriously. Sometime I crack a joke to make them feel better. But, you ESPECIALLY have to watch what you say when a girl is mad, they take a lot more things serious.

4. Could not being "fit with the norms" make people not like me? because i am probably one of the nicest people at my school... is that what it takes? BEING NICE? becuase that's what makes ME like people...

Being nice is a good thing. I don't think #4 really has any concern in this.

5. So, were these chicks staring at me becuase of the glasses (they thought i was looking staritght when i was looking to the side)
or were they staring at me becuase i am hot? would YOU stare at the opposite sex, merely becuase they had glasses on?

This goes both ways. Some might look at you because your funny and they need a quick laugh or they wonder what the hell your doing. Some people might look at you cause your good looking. A lot of girls like comedians and the sunglasses instantly says you don't care about image and more about personality, girls really like that.



To sum it all up: Just watch what you say when you say jokes. Keep doing like your doing and see how people react, if you see any opposition, then don't say jokes like that anymore. When you say a joke, you want everyone to like it, not half and half.

^this is just my 2 cents.

[Laguna]

LET's make this a discussion... like post after post after post.... if you want

That's what forums are.

[Ratfish256]

On the religion thing. Religious people are great, but only as long as they keep it to themselves. I cant see it being a problem unless you are always confronting people with it. If that isnt the case then your fine. Maybe try to get more involved with them, but be careful with who. Anyway in less than a year you may be off in colloge with a bunch of new people to meet and see.

[bluesummer]

and you say... don't read into everything... if you were doing the scientific method, would you NOT gather the details? that's what investigation is all about...

Sure, but if you had to sit and analyze every damn thing that every person said to you every day you could drive yourself insane trying to figure everyone else out. I used to do that, but I gave it up and chalked it up to 'it's their problem'.

As for this girl....I can't really say. Again, none of us here knows her personally.....but I would definitely chill with the 'joking' with her brother about how youre going to be his brother in law. She may find that creepy. I would.

[pianoplayer]

yeah... i see. I just took a personality disorder test... I guess I have some "schizo" something...not schizophrania, but some paranoia thing, where i always feel like i can "sense things." and I know i have intution, and i know that is a good thing... but mine is VERY touchy. I take EVERYTHING personally. My intuition is like a smoke alarm that goes off everytime someone farts (haha). but, i guess it's better to have a touchy intuition than not have one at all.

like today... I drove my friend home from school, and two cops drove by his house going different directions. one parked by a school, and one kept driving around.

And what did I start to think?... "oh no, someone must have called me in for "creepy behavior" because they think I'm stalking someone..."

i am very paranoid... i always feel like my phone lines are gbeing tapped, or that rumors are being spread about me, or that "i'm being watched...."

oh yeah... i also avoid driving by peoples houses, and i take different streets, becuase i am afraid that if they see me, they will think im stalking them, and will think i'm a creep. is that common?

i must be crazy... no, i just take things way too personally... anyone else have this problem?