There's this AMAZING girl I've liked for 9 years (I'm 24). She and I both love photography... and for the first time ever, she and I are going to go film a short a short video together in a park next week Saturday. We've never actually hung out together before and I'm usually pretty quiet when I'm around her and our friends. I've been lonely all of my life...never once held a girls hand, kissed, or even cuddled.. and don't have very good communication skills. During the few times we've actually talked tough, I feel like I've never felt before. I feel like she listens to me, cares about what I say, and simply makes me feel warm and genuinely good inside... and I never feel that way, not to mention I somehow can talk A LOT when she's around (a side of me over the last 9 years she hasn't seen much of). We see each other usually every Friday during our weekly "friends get-together" at my house for a bon-fire.

I've wanted to ask this girl out for what seems like forever. I've tried liking other girls, but none of them make me feel this way about them... it's the weirdest thing. The thing about this girl is that I don't feel like I need what a typical guy might want. I don't think about having sex with her, I don't think about making out with her... (At least not at first, second, third, of forth.. Don't get me wrong it would be nice but I honestly don't think about that firstly). I think about being the guy that can give her breakfast in bed in the morning, the guy that see last sees before work and the first when she comes home, the guy who gives her a massage to de-stress from the day, the guy who gives her his shoulder to lean on, and if she has to, to cry on, the guy that would wipe away her tears and take her blankets and put them in the dryer an hour before she lays down so I could tuck her in, in nice warm blankets and give her a kiss on the forehead before she falls asleep.

I've asked for advice on this girl from the people who've known me and this girl during these past 9 years. Some have told me:
-"Ask her out tonight."
-"Good things take time, even 9 years, but if its meant to be it will happen."
-"Just go out and make this video and be her friend. Don't say or try anything. Say it after."

I'll be honest and say I've felt that sometimes we are quite different from each other, but she's the other half of me that I feel that I need. She's not like me in almost every way, so she isn't some reflection of me in terms of the opposite sex. We do have photography as a common thing though. Which is why I am really excited about working on this project with her next weekend. I think this is what I will do:

1. Plan this video by finding a series of other similar videos to develop an idea of what we can make with the equipment we have. But I don't want to get too technical and scare her away. She likes photography and never made a film before.
2. Do the film with her, have her use my camera and learn a few buttons, and simply have fun. Not ask her out.
3. Come back home after the film, ask her to come back in a few days (when she has time) to check a potential finished product.
4. Once she arrives to see a pre-finalized cut of the video, have her watch it, and once she approves of the videos quality --- tell her how I feel and ask her out.

I have a feeling she'll say:
1. I think you'll treat me like a Queen and I don't think I want that.
2. Your too nice to me and I'm sorry but I go for the jerks.
3. I don't think I'm ready for a relationship right now and that kind of commitment.
4. Your a great guy but I just dont think your the guy for me. Your a great guy and I don't want you to change. You'll make a girl really happy one day.

Yes sadly I am planning to have her say no. (A friend of mine says I should also plan what to say if she says yes, but my self-esteem isn't that high with her behind closed doors LOL - though I surely will show enthusiasm around her no problem!) She knows for a fact I like her, all of our friends know. I feel like she's been expecting me to ask her out, which is why I think just going out and creating this video project (and just doing it "as friends" just for fun) is a good idea to do without asking her at the park. She'll least expect it to come when she comes by to review the nearly completed edited tape, but she might feel proud at what we accomplished together and reflect back on our filming trip and think that maybe I would be a good guy for her.

Any thoughts yall? Thanks much.