5 Months after GF confessed to cheating

[HeartIsAching]

It was the attention that was lacking in your relationship is why she cheated. It has nothng to do with your looks, your personality or your sexual performance. Women NEED emotional attention. It was your disconnetion from her is what lured her to this co-worker. It's so easy to find a connection with a co-worker because of the daily contact, and sharing common things about their job........office romances are very common. So don't compare yourself to this guy. He wasn't a better choice to her, he took advatage of her loneliness by giving her special attention. She never left you for him so that should tell you this affair had no substance.

Nothing FORCED her to cheat. She cheated because she wanted to. Her boyfriend didn't want her to cheat, the other guy didn't hold her down and force her legs apart FOUR TIMES that she'll admit to (I'm better there were more), whether or not those other things occurred is irrelevant - SHE cheated, but she's not taking responsibility for it, she's blaming it on the OP and on the guy at work.

[jb1111983]

Not getting enough attention from your bf doesn't give you the license to f**k some other guy. Like someone's already said she could have talked to OP. I could dump the love of my life if she cheated on me.

[smackie9]

Smackie, that may be true about the lack of attention, but cheating is not the right way to handle it. She should have talked to the OP, not cheated on him.

So many fall into the temption because they have given up. They know it's wrong but sometime, like a drug, they get overpowered by desire and their logic goes out the window.

[smackie9]

I'm not condoning her behaviour. I'm just explaining to him why she did it, and that it has nothing to do with whether the other guy was better looking, or was better in bed.......that was not her motivation for it. Of course she dealt with it poorly. But if he is willing to work on his relatonship, that is his decision.

[jb1111983]

I'm not condoning her behaviour. I'm just explaining to him why she did it, and that it has nothing to do with whether the other guy was better looking, or was better in bed.......that was not her motivation for it. Of course she dealt with it poorly. But if he is willing to work on his relatonship, that is his decision.

true it's his decision, his life. But the way you explained it made it sound like cheating is what a lot of women do when they don't get enough attention from their men. That to me is like trying to justify their act. Isn't it simple that decent women may break up with you but won't cheat on you?

Now don't hate me because I'm trying to be brutally honest!

[Dune]

Yes, be very clear and honest with yourself.

Why are you sticking to her? Do you really still love her or do you now feel more of an unhealthy attachment? If you're not happy with the relationship, you should start asking yourself and get to the bottom of it. It's been bugging you for 5 months, which means that something is obviously unresolved. Leaving it alone and hoping it would 'go away' is not an effective game plan dude.

If you consider continuing the relationship, do realise that it will NOT EVER be the same as before she cheated and you gotta accept that.

CLEARLY:
Cheating was HER decision. You DID NOT make her do it. That's just downright ****ing silly (Sorry this really pisses me off coz of personal experience)

I watched a video and it said, if someone ever cheated on you, just tell them to **** off. And don't view them as your ex. View them as scum. No use crying over spilled scum.

[smackie9]

Everyone has their own view of cheating. It's not right but people still do it no matter how you slice it. Some people like most of you will stomp their feet and say **** off. But there are those that are so in love, they are willing to forgive and work through the issues and most often the bond becomes even stronger between them.

I think most of you have been burned and are taking this post too personally. I have been cheated on myself, and I understood the circumstances.....I got over it.