Need some quick advice!

[crucest]

I registered because of a dilemma I've found myself in, and hopefully someone might help...

Several weeks ago, I was on OKCupid and began talking to someone who lives about 40 minutes away. After a week or so, we met for dinner, and then met for dinner again this past Thursday. After that, our conversations became more intimate and we began talking about getting together again this weekend or next week for sex.
It's just something casual for me, and I'm not at all involved emotionally, and made clear to her that I just want to have some fun with her.

The back story she provided was that she's recently out of a relationship that lasted a couple of years, and that she lives with a roommate. She mentioned the roommate leaving next week, so we could spend a few nights together with more privacy then. She said she hadn't had sex in about 2 months. The details she implied about her ex made him seem controlling and immature.

Well, last night I learned the truth. We had talked about hanging out last night, but I told her it would be late (after midnight) before I could come. She asked me to check with her then to see if she was up to it.
Around 10, I texted her and she said she was out drinking with friends. We flirted by text over the next hour or so. Around 11:30 was her last response. Between then and 12:30, I sent 3 more texts. I thought she might have gotten a little drunk and was probably asleep, but I finally called just to be sure. No answer. So, I waited a few more minutes and sent one last text wishing her a good night.
Several minutes later, I received a text from her phone:
"This is her husband. She's married."
I really thought nothing of it. My first assumption was that she and her friends were drunk & having fun with me. I laughingly replied that I was still out and about but would be going home soon, and asked again if she wanted me to come over.
"Dont contact my wife"
Irked, I responded by saying, "OK, then you ask your wife if she still needs the sex she's been begging me for over the past few days."
Stupid response in hindsight, because I soon found out it wasn't a joke. He called from her phone. I didn't talk, just listened to see who was calling. He yelled angrily. Sounded like an old, drunk redneck. I hung up. At home, I did a quick internet search. I didn't know her last name, but her first isn't very common. I found her Facebook profile and discovered her last name there, as well as the fact she's been married 5+ years. Hubby also has a profile and is, indeed, an old redneck. He's nearly 60, while she's in her late 20s. It became clear that he's the "roommate". A Google search reveals he has a job that would make him travel a fair amount, which would explain why her "roommate" would be away next week.

So, anyway...
I'm not seeking relationship advice or advice on what I did wrong. I just want to know if I should call the police to be sure she's OK. I'm really irked, but that doesn't mean I'm not worried this guy might harm her after learning the truth. Being unable to contact her by phone last night, I sent her an e-mail asking for an explanation and for her to at least let me know she's not in danger. I'm guessing her e-mails also go to her phone, though, because I again received 2 angry replies from the husband, using her account.
I know where she works, and that she and her manager are good friends. Should I discreetly call her manager and ask her to check in with her? Should I call the police and explain the situation and that I'm a little concerned that I might have incited a domestic disturbance? Or should I just move on and not worry?

[oldfriend]

if I were you I'd let it go...he has a right to be pissed if his wife is messing around on him. And should you contact a co-worker could cause more problems like ptentially her losing her job and respect. You obviously can't trust her so you never really know what she's said to others about you or if you eve exist to them so by saying something would potentially causing more problems then good. Plus there is always a chance that she and her husband or friends are just playing games with people on the internet. even though she lied to you you're still concerned about her well being I'd let it go knowing you're the better person! Good luck.

[crucest]

This girl's a 20-something Filipina who has been in the US not much longer than she's been married, and her husband is an old, angry hillbilly and former truck driver (this is what a Google search reveals). Obviously, there are assumptions I can make about their relationship that lead me to believe she could be in danger. I don't get involved with dishonest people, nor with girls who aren't single, but I think it's natural for me to be concerned for her safety. After all, given her demeanor in person and her actions so far, she must be trying to escape this situation for some reason.
I'm really conflicted here.

[oldfriend]

I get it I would be too...but because there is dishonesty there how do you know what's real and isn't? You will just never know who she really is so with that in mind it's best to just keep it to yourself. I'm sure some of your conflict is a tad triggered by wanting to hear the truth and being pissed off. You should also keep in mind that you might not be the first person she's done this too....or busted by the hubs...just let it be and find a nice girl....to date....and a drunk girl to f**k. Lol.

[Riku]

You have no real indication that she is danger. All you know is that she is married to a much older guy who "sounded like a redneck" and you are stereotyping him into being an abusive husband. Stay out of it. He has a right to be angry and I'm sure he sounded angry to you but that doesn't equate to him hurting her physically. There is no way you will be in contact with her now. Just because you don't hear from her doesn't mean she is hurt. Her husband found out about you and she isn't gonna call or text or email you because he is gonna be watching her like a hawk. Stop contacting her and forget about the whole thing.

[crucest]

Sorry, but many stereotypes arise from some truth. I have known far too many men exactly like this guy. He has enough of an online trail to form a rather complete character analysis. If a guy like this learns his wife is being unfaithful, it is more likely than not that he will harm her. I have seen it happen too many times.

[oldfriend]

just cos there's a stereotype doesn't mean something bad could happen. How would ya feel if your wife was cheating on you? And ur not a hillbilly.

[oldfriend]

besides if she were that afraid of him cheating on him would never cross her mind.

[crucest]

It's not that I think something bad has happened or will happen. It's that there is a greater than normal possibility of it, and I might be the only person to alert the proper people to prevent it from happening.

[oldfriend]

nah ur not the only person....you said she has good friends right? They would know too hon.

[crucest]

Fair enough, but let's remember the person who said she has good friends is the same who told me she's single.

[oldfriend]

true...but I wouldn't worry about it she sounds like a jerk and so does he....theyre perfect for one another.