Hot teen girl rides by our apt, my husband notices & I am pissed! Help?

[rad boog]

Hi, so my husband and I are young adults (early 20's) married for a year and very happy. But lately, when we are outside going to the car, gardening, getting the mail or going for a walk, we have both noticed that a teen girl (around 16/17) that is very pretty has been riding right past our apartment on her road bike. The first time we saw her my husband commented on what a great bike and watched her ride by. (He's really into road bikes). The second time she came by on a different day, he commented on "here comes cute girl on a bike" I'm just really jealous and I know my husband is into cycling so I know he must be attracted to his cute girl. And it seems like he almost goes outside more now. Maybe I'm paranoid, but it's just so annoying! I asked him to stop commenting on her. She rides by almost everyday and I'm getting to the point where I don't want my husband to notice her when were outside. I do not have confidence issues or low self esteem.

*Is this something I should just get over?
*How to get over it?
*Would this annoy anyone else?
*Any words of advice?

[vashti]

Unfortunately, there isn't much of an age gap between you guys and this young girl, so i can't imagine he would find it inappropriate to be attracted to her. Unless he is trying to talk to her, there isn't really much you can say or do without sounding like a lunatic.

[warriormaiden]

You sound like a lunatic. :p

Is it wrong to be attracted to someone you're not married to? I know you may want your husband to have eyes for you and you alone, but you can't turn that attraction off when a ring gets slapped on to your finger. He's going to look at other girls, and it's only natural. I'm sure you find other men attractive as well. It's up to him if he decides to take the next step and cheat. There's absolutely nothing wrong with looking in my opinion, just don't touch. If he cheated on you with this girl, THEN there would be a problem. But for right now, I wouldn't worry about it.

BTW, why did you get married so young anyway? I mean, I'm happy that your marriage is going SO WELL and everything, but most marriages (in this day and age anyway) have alot of turmoil when the couple gets married at such a young age, I have noticed.

[pisces25]

I agree I don't think he is doing anything wrong at this point. He is a guy it's what they do. If you feel it is a big issue and he is continuously commenting even when you ask him not to then he is disrespecting your wishes, which is more of a reason to feel dissatisfied. Just check in with him, make sure he is ok with how the marriage is going, is there anything he desires from you in the bedroom, how is it all going with him etc and see what he says. Sometimes in marriage people tend to stop communicating and that is where assumptions creep in and things can go pear-shaped. Cliche but communication is the key. Really though IMO it just sounds like a bit of eye candy for him and if he isn't acting on that I don't think you should be worried.

[surfhb]

Only a girl in her early 20 s would post such a ridiculous topic on a love advice forum

[MerryH]

Frigid older woman rides her scooter by our apt, my husband notices & I am pissed. Help?

[MerryH]

Paraplegic male rides motorized wheelchair by our apt, my husband notices & I am pissed. Help?

[MerryH]

Circus clown rides unicycle by our apt, my husband notices & I am pissed. Help?

[MerryH]

Hot teen circus clown rides my husband, I noticed & I am pissed. Help?

[Cerby]

HOT TEEN CIRCUS CLOWN? WHERE!?

but to the OP, just get over it, window shopping isn't a concern, just a long as he isn't handling the merchandise.

[steviej]

Only start getting worried when he asks you to dress like her and only has sex with you doggy style. On a bike.

[sookie6]

I nearly got into an argument with my sister this week end when she commented that she does not want to have a single girl in her and her boyfriend's social circle...I found that terribly insecure and immature (she is 26).

When in a relationship I would rather have my partner exposed to women in general and attractive women are part of life. I can't lock him up in the hope that he will only have eyes for me.


There is always gonna be prettier and as you age younger and younger women...you should really grow out of this or else you'll get very depressed.

Remind yourself that your husband chose to marry you so you are his number one (that is of course if he was not pressured into marriage).

As a side note, Early twenties is young to get married these days.

[Take2]

Here's a tip, you will probably overall find yourself happier with a guy who has a libido than one who doesn't. A guy who loves your body and is attracted to you and shows you that all the time? He is sexually attracted to women. When he sees other women who are attractive, he WILL notice. A guy who doesn't even see other women? He is a sexual dud.

Now, your dude is not JUST noticing, he is going out of his way to comment. Perhaps you can address this. Tell him, look, I know you see other hot women and notice, and as long as you keep your hands off of them, I am fine with that. But please don't tell me about each one. You wouldn't like it if I pointed out every hot guy I see, right?

[Looq]

Solution: Threesome.

[devonbrown]

You say you don't have self-esteem or confidence issues, yet your jealousy sounds like they are borne directly from those issues.
Here are the facts as I see them:
1) He noticed a cute girl on a bike.
2) He told you he noticed that the girl was cute.
3) You got upset that he noticed she was cute.

Have some faith and trust in your husband. And be honest with yourself. Let him know that him making that comment hurt your self-esteem and you would appreciate it if he didn't do that any more. Stop fooling yourself into thinking you don't have those issues. And don't make your husband wish he would do something with the girl if you keep on him about it.

Good luck.