Not getting equal emotion from my Girlfriend

[Jay34]

For background purposes I have always been quite vacant when it comes to relationships, by that I mean I have always done a good job at making my girlfriends feel like I don't take much attention to them. I live in my own world & am happy getting on with my own life. One main thing that has attracted the girls I went out with them is that I have a good outlook on life and am full of energy (so they have told me).

Over the last few years I have worked on myself a lot as I know that being vacant with people and it is destroying my relationships.
In my current relationship which has been going for over a year now I made a decision that I am dedicate to her & i'm going to stop pissing around as not only am I destroying the relationships but also causing upset to them.

The problems is that she is very similer to how I was and can be very distant with me. I'm always tell her how great she looks and how I love coming to see her but I have in no way been receiving the same back from her. She has been stressed a lot recently & I always tell her to ring me if she needs to let off steam & she used to love massages ect. But nowadays she doesn't request anything or sometimes even acknowledge me.
I suppose i'm getting back what I have given over the years but now I've got to a point when I'm getting boared of going to hers & feeling like I could be doing other things over the weekend.

I had a vasectamie today which was not a big issue to me but I hardly got any response back.

P.s she has a 4 year old and we get on brilliantly.

[smackie9]

Talk to HER about this. I don't think it has anything to do with you just giving her more attention. If she is giving you the cold shoulder there is something else going on and the only way to solve this is through communication.

[devonbrown]

I agree that communication is the key to resolving this. But remember that everyone expresses their emotions in different ways. It is just a matter of finding the right compatibility.

Good luck.

[reeba]

'I had a vasectamie today which was not a big issue to me but I hardly got any response back.'

Is this what this post is really about? You getting a vasectomy? And what kind of response were you looking for? Ever think that she didn't approve of what you were doing?

When I was young, and the guy I was dating got a vasectomy (and this DID occur to me when I was 24 dating a freshly divorced 38 year old) I dumped him. No I did not tell him not to do it. It wasn't that I wanted to marry him and have his babies. It was just the idea that he was 100% shutting me out of my fantasy future that involved kids, a white picket fence, and a dog. I knew then he was just an eff. And I need to think there is some possibility of a future, to continue with a relationship.

[smackie9]

'I had a vasectamie today which was not a big issue to me but I hardly got any response back.'

Is this what this post is really about? You getting a vasectomy? And what kind of response were you looking for? Ever think that she didn't approve of what you were doing?

I thought of this too. I have a few questions. How new is this relationship? Have you talked about a future together? Marriage? Why did you decide to have this operation? Was this ever discussed with her? Does she approve?