Well wish me luck

[Horseyguy]

Looks like me and the ex are heading for a reconciliation

Few issues I need to get resolved with her before I'm 100% comfortable jumping back in but it's certainly heading that way

I'll keep you posted

[ktm390]

that is awesome! good luck!!

[Horseyguy]

Yay! we are officially back together again

Took 8 weeks to get there but well worth the effort

[ktm390]

lucky guy! im workin on the same thing myself. good for you man!

[Horseyguy]

lucky guy! im workin on the same thing myself. good for you man!

Thanks Dude

And hope it works out for you as well

[ktm390]

ya me too but im gonna need some help!

[Horseyguy]

what sort of help? If there is anything I can do, more than happy too

[DarkHelmet82]

Horesguy has been helping me.. I don't have anything to report but it sounds like good advice... I hope all is not lost at this point though... Oh and congrats dude..

[ktm390]

what sort of help? If there is anything I can do, more than happy too

[url]http://www.loveforum.net/love-advice-forum/51097-good-news-bad-news.html[/url]

well i guess you can read this and tell me what you think? like how long should i wait to call her. and what should i say to her when i do? and if you have any tips on how i can get over the her sleeping with someone else. i just dont know if i can do it. its all i can think about every time i close my eyes. i just see some random guy ****in her and it sucks really bad! i know i cant be upset about it but it still really bothers me.

[Anturo]

[url]http://www.loveforum.net/love-advice-forum/51097-good-news-bad-news.html[/url]

well i guess you can read this and tell me what you think? like how long should i wait to call her. and what should i say to her when i do? and if you have any tips on how i can get over the her sleeping with someone else. i just dont know if i can do it. its all i can think about every time i close my eyes. i just see some random guy ****in her and it sucks really bad! i know i cant be upset about it but it still really bothers me.

Not even back together yet and she is already lying to you.

Is there a different color than RED for the flag?

[Horseyguy]

[url]http://www.loveforum.net/love-advice-forum/51097-good-news-bad-news.html[/url]

well i guess you can read this and tell me what you think? like how long should i wait to call her. and what should i say to her when i do? and if you have any tips on how i can get over the her sleeping with someone else. i just dont know if i can do it. its all i can think about every time i close my eyes. i just see some random guy ****in her and it sucks really bad! i know i cant be upset about it but it still really bothers me.

Well I guess it will all come down to how you can handle the thought of her sleeping with someone else although from what I read that wasn't confirmed, even if it was she didn't cheat on you as you had broken up at that point

Other than that issue I can't see why you wouldn't just be calling her and trying to sort it out, seems obvious she wants you guys to be back together

[ktm390]

thanks man i just dont know how to get over her 'new' life without me. but if i want her back im gonna have to find a way.

[Horseyguy]

UPDATE

Mehh, not going as well as I hoped it was to be honest

Nothing really has / is changing

Will be lucky to spend 2 nights with her this Month and I'm away for 3 weeks in April so that's looking like another 2 nights at best

Starting to feel myself pull back on her now (Which I thought might happen) I just have this feeling that when the dog becomes sicker and eventually passes, she will go back into a down spiral again which will result in pushing me away again.

So I'm sort of back in but in a half hearted sort of way, barriers are well up in anticpation of a repeat of January, really don't feel inspired to pursue her, I've cut my contact right back on morning / evening texts (which she notices and commented about me being quiet lately) and I know she will contact me this weekend to arrange catching up next week but I can't say I'm really that excited about the prospect to be honest

Problem I see it goes back to the 8 weeks at the start of the year where she couldn't deal with the dog being sick so pushed me away, I pretty much dealt with the relationship ending during that period, went and saw a counsellor and got my head straight on it, I really should have left it alone at that point when I ended it with her rather than agreeing to get back together. What we had is now gone, and what we have just isn't doing it for me

[vashti]

Yeah, it's really hard to recapture something once it's gone.

So what are you going to do?

[Horseyguy]

Dunno Vashti

My gut is still telling me to walk away because I just can't see us being back to where we were at the end of last year and we are realy just not moving forward, just feel we have hit a plateau.

I just think she likes her own space too much. I don't think wanting to spend more than a couple of nights a month together after we were spending like 10-14 is being needy or demanding, and she's doing nothing to address the alcohol issue, last time I stayed there a couple of weeks back she sank a whole bottle of wine just so she could sleep, personally I just don't think she's in the right space for a committed relationship. She should just go back to casual dating and be done with it, that way she can have all the space to deal with whatever she wants to deal with and hook up with guys when she feels she wants some male company.

She doesn't want to loose me because as she put it, I'll get snapped up by someone else. She knows I'm a good partner and if I meet someone else she's worried she will never get me back.

Bottom line is she's messed up right now, she's not really dealing with the issues and time is running away. She doesn't want to let me go and is hoping I'll just sit it out until she's in a better space and then we will be ok, but I've already sat it out for 3 Months and nothing is changing

I'm starting to resent her for not treating the relationship and me as a priority and I'm backing off to protect myself from getting hurt again so unless something gives in the very near future I can't see any other option than to just cut my losses and walk away

I Love her to bits and I have been real patient but I deserve better than this and I'm not staying with someone just because I love them if the the realtionship is not working and looking like it's going no-where (Does that make sense?)