Just met her, let's see what you guys think. (laundry list of problems)

[Darkest Heaven]

I've been posting here for a few weeks now and we seem to have a level headed bunch of folks here, so here you go, new girl I met. I know she likes me, etc etc, here is the story.


She's 22. She had sex with over 100 people. She has bone cancer, a post clamitiya (sp?)(according to her she's now STD free) disease that is slowly killing her, her ex has 27 felonies, murder being one of them, lives up the street from her and still stalks her.

I have been through a LOT in my time, but compared to her, I was born yesterday. I'm not intimidated by this as much as I am concerned. STD's can only be given to me through kissing, as sex I choose not to have until I am married, and oral is something that's completely far away. I WANT to kiss her, but I mean, 22, 100 people, so many terminal illness's... ya know? I'm being paranoid and irrational in that, but I'm trying to be safe. I've expressed all of this to her as I am expressing it to everybody here now. She says she understands.

Another dilemma is what if we really hit it off and she DOES die? I'm 22, also. Where will that leave me? How badly would it **** me up mentally?


So as you see, there are a lot of issues here already. Our second date is supposed to be in a few hours. I like this girl, and I know the proper questions I have to ask myself, and that only I can find a true answer. What I'm looking for from you folks is just opinions. Maybe one of you could look at it a way that I'm not, which would help me analyze this situation better.

[MerryH]

I hate to say this, but she sounds like a pathological liar. I mean, sure all that could be true, but this really sounds like the types of stories I've heard from pathological liars I've known. So, just...be cautious.

I don't think I'd ever get involved with someone with a terminal illness. Maybe that makes me a shitheel, but why start something that's not going to last? And you're not going to have sex until you're married, and she doesn't seem to be an ideal candidate for marriage. It's just like, what's the point? You kind of seem grossed out by her, anyway.

Also, providing that she's not completely full of shit, she has revealed way too much about her baggage after only one date. It reeks of attention whore, which leads to loads of drama.

[vashti]

I agree with MerryH. This girl is definitely a problem, though maybe not for the reasons you think. Run.

[justcheckin]

dude what are you thinking? I am all about falling in love, but you got to stop thinking with your balls and think with yoru head for a second. if shes sleep with 100 guys, shes not stopping now.

[Darkest Heaven]

I am going to see her soon. I will talk to her about all of this in person. I can almost always tell the difference between female shit and female truth. Something about her draws me in, aside from all of that. So if I can figure this out with her, good. If not, I'm not afraid to cut ties.

[Darkest Heaven]

We hung out again. Second night in a row, but this time in the back of her car at the same Meijer parking lot. (think Walmart SuperCenter parking lot, same concept, 24/7 store...)


I brought up all of my issues, and she looked at me and just nodded and agreed and understood. After about maybe half an hour, we moved to the back seat and cuddled up and just talked, goofed around, and even took a nap. We HAVE been meeting at midnight- 6, and today 5, even though she has work. She said it's worth it to her. I start back up Wednesday, though they haven't called me on a time, but I think it's worth it, too.


We connected more so than last night and on deeper levels. I know what y'all are thinking- that we just made out all night. Well no, hell, we had a first kiss, but there was no tongue in the process. I didn't stay a virgin for 22 years to shove my tongue down throats. Anyways, we really like each other. She talked about my problems instead of just "whatever", and she resolved all of them with me.

Problems on a second date would be a red flag, but it was amazing how quick she was to take my point and expand on it to ensure she understood before replying.


Overall, I am satisfied. She is a special breed of girl, for more than one reason. You know, I always joked how I'd find love and she died, never thought it was actually a possibility. Don't take that the wrong way, I'm nowhere near love with this girl. Right now, I like her a lot, and I'm VERY MUCH infatuated and intrigued. But before all else, I must not be controlled by the "honey moon" stage, and look at things with a realistic eye. I'm aware of that, but for now, I'm going to go and sleep peacefully.

Things are going well at this point, and there's no sense in dreading the future. It's going to happen regardless.

[Boisdevie]

I think you should marry her asap because she is very special.

OR BEND OVER AND TAKE IT UP THE ASS

[red_sparrow]

lol wtf? this girl sounds like a godammned lunatic.
but you are innocent and pure, and you are attracted to her 'dangerous' personality. i get that! i've had that happen to me many times, too.

[Darkest Heaven]

I'm far from innocent and pure, but I see what you're saying.

I have thought about why I'm attracted to her. This may have to do with my ex, it may not, but I like how she is a real person. She doesn't lose herself in me or vice versa, ya know? We talk, be ourselves, and connect on that level and mesh very well from what I've seen so far. It's rare for me to find a date that doesn't bore me, or make me feel like a genius, etc etc, so I'm really happy we can just talk and goof off without losing ourselves in each other.

[xxazurexx]

Lots of reasons why I wouldn't choose to get involved.

I'm wondering what kind of woman would choose to get involved with a man who is always in and out of prison....and for murder? Assuming she met him 'after' all of this.

Takes all sorts I guess.

[girl68]

I find it very hard to believe she's going to wait until you're married to have sex again. She's slept with 100's really?

[MerryH]

Can I ask why your dates run from midnight to 6am? And why do you just sit in a car in a grocery store parking lot?

[Sonrisa]

trolling i see

[Darkest Heaven]

The reason we spend our time in the car is because I don't trust her enough.

Her room mate is "laying in her bed because he wants her all to himself".... and so I don't want to go over there to avoid a possible scene. I don't want to bring her back here to my place yet because I'm still trying to learn about her, her past, and how she spends time with people from it, even though they were so horrible.

So, in essence, I don't trust her. But, I don't want to throw something that's possibly good away just yet. I mean it's been two days... and I'm already solving serious stuff like this? Yeah, it's a little much, but when we are together, I mean it's great. So, logic versus feelings. Commence the confusion.

[MerryH]

The reason we spend our time in the car is because I don't trust her enough.

Her room mate is "laying in her bed because he wants her all to himself".... and so I don't want to go over there to avoid a possible scene. I don't want to bring her back here to my place yet because I'm still trying to learn about her, her past, and how she spends time with people from it, even though they were so horrible.

So, in essence, I don't trust her. But, I don't want to throw something that's possibly good away just yet. I mean it's been two days... and I'm already solving serious stuff like this? Yeah, it's a little much, but when we are together, I mean it's great. So, logic versus feelings. Commence the confusion.

Ah, yes, I see.

Hahahahaha.