Is this guy interested?

[katielacey]

Hi everyone,
Could do with some advice - as I'm pretty clueless!
Basically this guy I knew very vaguely asked me if I wanted to go out for a drink. I suggested last Monday after work.
He had a meeting that evening so we caught up for an hour and then he had to go. He paid for the drinks even though I had got money out incase.

He apologised for having to go and even text me after his meeting apologising for leaving and saying he'd had a good time.
Then texted me a few times every day after that.
Then asked if I wanted to meet up at the weekend. I agreed and offered to go to where he lives (I work in that area but live an hour away). I suggested we go out somewhere for lunch.
He then said he was really happy to meet me in my town and travelled over here.
We had a good time and he made a point of paying for lunch.
But we didn't hold hands, kiss or anything like that.
Since then he's texted everyday and asked when I wanted to meet up again.
I suggested Thursday or Saturday night but he is busy Thursday so he said Saturday.
Yet when I texted him yesterday he said he was probably going to a party on Saturday night but would let me know.
He then texted me again suggesting we meet up on Sunday.

I'm just a bit confused. Is this guy interested in being just friends oris there more to it than that?
I don't want to get my hopes up!

Any help and advice much appreciated! xx

[xxazurexx]

Tell him not to call you again and until he 'actually' has time to take you out.

No I wouldn't get my hopes up, especially when he postponed a date with you, to go to a party instead.

[Yet another guy]

I have a mixed feeling about his behaviour. On one hand he acts if he was very interested - insisting on paying for drinks and lunch. On the other hand he would postpone the date to go to a party. On the third hand you can't reschedule other peoples parties but people eat lunch almost every day. I suppose that only he knows whom he is interested in.

[katielacey]

Yeah I'm confused too. Think I'm gonig to assume he's not interested but I've already kind of agreed to see him Sunday.
He invited me to his church in the morning actually but I kind of don't want to go as I don't really know what the situation is with us and would feel wierd meeting his friends and not knowing.

It's strange bcz the amount he texts and stuff would make u think he was interested. But I am kind of put out he said he had a birthday party to go to.
He texted me "peek a boo" randomly yesterday too which I would say is the kind of thing u would only text a girl u liked....

Think I might leave it about Sunday - wait for him to confirm it and stuff now.

What do you guys think?

[Yet another guy]

A birthday party, you say? Well, I think he seems quite interested but not yet head over heels in love. It would require something special for me to skip a close friends birthday party and I guess that goes for him too. You should definitely talk to him about his intentions.

[QuietProfession]

i think youre overthinking it. if he "had" a birthday party to go to, that implies an obligation. that doesnt mean hes not interested in you - it means he follows through on his commitments. jeez.

[Boisdevie]

Talk to the guy, like on the telephone. You know, you dial the number and then talk to the other person and then find out for yourself

[xxazurexx]

i think youre overthinking it. if he "had" a birthday party to go to, that implies an obligation. that doesnt mean hes not interested in you - it means he follows through on his commitments. jeez.

Really? I don't think so and if he can break a committment to a date with her. In fact the guy has 'wishy washy' all over him and with this breaking of 2 dates and this early into knowing her....one for being busy and the 'Ooooops sorry, party to attend'..

If people have important parties coming up and important functions that they want to attend, they are usually given a lot of notice and before the party takes place.

I get the impression that this party invite was received and AFTER he made the date with her...and he chose the party over her.

Do not take this man seriously and if he can cancel a date to attend a party, that he was seemly invited too and after making a date with you.

And take no notice of how often he calls/texts either.....it's the actions that count and he'd be setting dates to actually 'see you', he'd turn up for those dates and get to know you further, if he was really interested.

I'm not saying dont see him again....I'm saying watch his actions from here and if he cancels again....blow his ass out.

[girl68]

I don't know yet if he is or isn't. Make a physical move on him. Hug him, or put your arm around his back or something like that. See how he responds.

[QuietProfession]

okay lets go over actual facts... you know, things we know for sure:

he did not break 2 dates. he arranged and followed through on 2 dates with her.

hes telling her on monday the he is probably going to a birthday party on saturday
that's 5 days notice.

i dont know about you guys, but the only birthday parties ive gone to are friends and family. if i just met a girl and my little cousin has a birthday party... i mean are you saying he should flake on going to his little brothers birthday party? or his own mothers birthday party? jeez, you guys sure want to on the top of a guys priority list with little time invested!

[xxazurexx]

^If it was an immediate family member, he'd have KNOWN about this party, which night it was to be held and he WOULDN'T have arranged to see her that night. He'd have arranged to see her, when he knew he had a night available....

If this was an important event that he felt obligated to attend...then he wouldn't have said to this girl that he was *PROBABLY* going. He'd feel OBLIGED to go and because it was a family member and it's a family event and he'd want to go.

Soooo, he wouldn't *PROBABLY* be attending...but he *WOULD* be attending....

So we can rule family out ....

[QuietProfession]

^If it was an immediate family member, he'd have KNOWN about this party

thats not true at all. you are oversimplying things.

you have no idea whats going on in his life, you are pulling assumptions out and making up these arbitrary rules: "if this, then he WOULD that" and this is simply not true at all. but the fact (you know, things we *know* to be true, not made up stuff) is that we have no actual idea whats going on in his life. maybe it was a last minute thing that got put together. maybe whoevers birthday it is originally planned for no party, or hadnt completely decided yet, and now theyve finally confirmed the date and he said he would go. anything could be happening.

jeez, god forbid a guy has a busy life and obligations outside of a girl he likes.

If this was an important event that he felt obligated to attend...then he wouldn't have said to this girl that he was *PROBABLY* going. He'd feel OBLIGED to go and because it was a family member and it's a family event and he'd want to go.

Soooo, he wouldn't *PROBABLY* be attending...but he *WOULD* be attending....

So we can rule family out ....

now youre just arguing semantics, and i have no interest in that.

[xxazurexx]

^^ Couldn't give a flying fck what YOU are interested in.

I'm entitled to MY opinion and it still stands, EMERALD....

[QuietProfession]

um, okay, RUBY