Feelings for someone I probably shouldn't have feelings for. Opinions?

[curly1118]

Alright.

So basically I have known this girl since I was like a year old. She is my uncle's wife's sister, so we are COMPLETELY unrelated by blood.

I don't really know how to explain this or to even have you guys take me seriously. But I have had feelings for this person now for maybe just the past few years or so. I always shrugged it off as no big deal and nothing will develop so I shouldn't think about it too much. And I never really did until now.

But last year, December 24 2010. So like a month ago or so. Her and I were talking quite a bit at a family Christmas gathering. Her boyfriend was there and he was kinda acting like a douche, as per usual. So I think she felt like she should talk and interact with me and others to get her mind off of him. I am 21 and she is 22. Having a general good time just chatting it up. We get along extremely well, having known each other for such a long time. Now, I never ever dance at my family's christmas parties, they're all from el salvador and chile so they all like dancing just for fun and whatnot. But I never really take part in that, just don't feel comfortable dancing. I can do it but I would rather not so I usually just sit on the couch and interact with other people.

But this year was different. She pulled me up from off the couch and wanted me to dance. Now, I wouldn't normally feel weird about a harmless dance, but... She wanted me to hold her really close, she moved in close to me and I'd never really had that with her before. I know dancing is close generally but this was different. She wanted to hold my hand and put my other hand on the small of her back. After the song ended she put her arms around me and gave me a hug. But not like a normal hug you would expect from family. A close, warm hug. I don't know if that makes sense. It felt really nice though. I've been broken up with my girlfriend of a year for some time now and it felt good to have someone interact with me like that again.

This year, she even bought me a present, and asked that I add her on facebook so we could keep in touch and talk more.

So, I don't know if I am reading too much into this. She was definitely being flirtatious and whatnot with me and when I left to go home she gave me another big hug reminding me to look her up on facebook.

But yeah. I don't know if my feelings are right or wrong. I am attracted to her but I don't know what I should do. I won't make any moves on her as she has a boyfriend. From what I been hearing she may want out of that relationship. I haven't added her on facebook either because I'm struggling with this in my head. I mean, what if something did happen? What if she wanted to hang out or spend some time together with just her and I and one thing led to another? I don't think my family would have issues with her and I dating or anything.

I mean, we aren't related by blood... I don't look at her as a cousin or anything like that. More of a good friend I see every now and then. I'm just really confused...

What do you guys think I should do?

[HeartIsAching]

Here's a thought - ask.

Seriously, tell her that you weren't sure if you imagined it, but you felt something was up and wanted to find out. Be honest.

[curly1118]

That's a good idea. And I've wrestled with that decision, too. I just don't want to be totally off base and then have her talk to our whole family about how much of a freak I am, or something of the like.

Would something like this be considered normal by the way? Being attracted to her, I mean. :s

[ashley89]

I still think it's kind of weird... you aren't related by blood but you still are related! just like my aunts who married into my mom's side of the family are still my aunts, even though they aren't blood related. it's just a little odd to me

[curly1118]

Yeah... it feels odd to me as well. It feels wrong, actually. But I can't help it. I really do like her. D:

[Mongoose]

Hmm, doesn't seem too bad to me. I don't think there's even a name for uncle's wife's sister. You might want to check with someone in your family though, since them finding it awkward is the thing you need to worry about from my point of view.

[curly1118]

Yeah. Thanks for the posts guys. I think I've made up my choice.