Why do girls talk about other guys?

[leight69]

I've been told by several of my female friends, that girls talk about other guys, ex-boyfriends around guys they are interested in.


Why do they do that?

[Argile]

Why do guys talk about what girls are cute, who they've dated, and who they've had sex with?

I'm going to make a statement and you can tell me how accurate it is:

You don't have a very large group of close male friends. Do you?

No offense,

[leight69]

your statement is incredibly inaccurate. no offense.

I have a very large group of close male friends.

my group of close female friends is considerably smaller.

as per guys who talk about cute girls theyve dated, humped...etc. most guys i know, keep the details to themselves, they might say they got some, and if it was good or not...but they also don't talk about it to a girl they want to get with. and mostly when guys say it to other guys, its to boast, either make themselves feel good...or just cause some guys feel pressured by others to say something. (mind you my circle of friends we dont care for the details) .....girls on the other hand, go crazy into detail about who, how many, how big, what postions...how good, how long...etc.

anyway the point of the thread is....whytalk about an ex to someone you're interested in? I wouldnt want to talk about my ex, around a girl im interested in.....but strangly girls seem to have the oposite instinct.

[Argile]

OK dude, I totally apologize. I totally thought that you meant, why do girls talk about guys to other girls. Shoot man, I reread that and I have a totally different response. I read it wrong the first time and was like "Don't you talk about the girls you've dated with your guy friends?"

Now that I've read it right, I apologize, and heres a -real- response.

The answer is:

This is totally dependant on the girl!
I would venture to guess that this girl -herself- does that, and feels there's nothing wrong with it. There are a lot of possible reasons for this...

Maybe she thinks it will make the guy jealous and earn her control of a possible dating situation.

Maybe she uses it as a way of bragging.

Maybe she is instead telling all the "sad" details of the previous relationship to evoke an emotional response of empathy.. thereby causing the typically male stereotyped response of "White Knight To The Rescue!"

The simple fact is, this girl is not the oracle of ages. She don't know crap. Just cause she says it's so doesn't mean it's so. I have only dated one girl who ever did this, and she did this because she was trying to make me feel like I had to compete with the "great sex" she had with other guys. I'm not with her anymore.

Needless to say, every girl is different, and this generalization is no more accurate than saying "all men talk about their experiences with women in detail around women they are interested in."

A thought, this may be some kind of traditional sort of cultural thing too.. I mean, dating is often complicated by the culture the two people come from? Is she british, american indian, or chinese or what? Consider this question a random Argile survey.

[leight69]

hmm....well its not only one of my "girl-friends" that has told me this.

as for ethnicity....one is french canadian, one was native-american and one is of east indian decent......and yeah they all grew up in different parts of canada.

only two of them know each other...

one of them told me its to try to invoke a jealous reaction...but also to let the guy know she's availible...but wasnt really sure beyond that.

[islandgirl]

Sometimes if a girl has a lot of guy friends, its natural to talk about them, not really to get another guy jealous. But of course they are just friends and not in a relationship with them. If she is in a relationship with another guy then she usually won't go into detail--that she'll save for her girlfriends.

[jane]

I have to say that I have many male friends and I do talk about them .. most of htem time I am trying to find them dates. Some of my guy friends i have known for years and we are more like brother and sister not Bf and G/f Women talk about everything. I am sure some it may be to try and make men jealous but most if it is harmless.

[DuckyWucky]

I hate talking about other girls I've been with around females I'm very much interested in. There's this girl I like now, and I never talk about past reltionships/hookups. I hate to hear about the ones she's been in as well. It's never a good idea to do/say that anyways.

I guess some girls talk about other guys in front of the ones they like, because they want to see what kind of reaction is withdrawn from that guy they're with. They want to see if he gets jealous in anyway, and how he reacts to the idea of her with someone else.

I'm not even sure though. Girls are weird. I love em...

[Killerbabe]

I don't know some girls are just clueless and think they're cool for talking about other guys meaning "hey, I'm really pretty and popular you know. See this one guy really liked me". It's pretty dumb but some girls are pretty dumb just kidding.

[jane]

we can be.. It depends....

[islandgirl]

Here's a long, long thread, on somewhat the same topic from another board (can I do that?!).

[url]http://therfs.com//index.php?act=ST&f=1&t=14215&[/url]