This is the first time in my life that I am not being loved back by someone, simply because this is a long distance thing. We knew each other by telephone, never exchanged photos. No need for that if he is not sincere.
In the first 2 months he was hot and I was led into the whole feeling thing by him, which I haven't had for more than 20years. He asked me to be his friend, which means something more than ordinary friends. Ater a month, I developed feelings which felt strange for me.
After 2 months, things changed. He never called. I have been waiting, expecting. And I actually look good. Boys always come to me. I have to send them away. I am very attractive at parties etc. Thats why my ego is high and gets hurt. I don't want to give away photos just to pull him back. If he is not sincere, what a shame on myself, particularly when he does not call back. It may mean things have changed for him. He was not calling me during holidays and weekends, which I think it is an insult to me. And he has to choose his clients at work over me when he struggles between taking calls from clients and talking with me. These days he said he would call back, but I am so so so tired of waiting for him.
I don't want to depend my happiness on him, and I know it is insane. My worth does not depend on him. I could not hang in there for long esp.when he never takes time to talk with me. I want to dump him as I have lost hope in him. This is just so impolite to ask someone to be his friend and then put it aside. Though I would like to find out the reason for putting me aside, I still want to dump him and forget him. He just does not worth my heart and energy, though we have a lot in common. I am just soooo good, and yet he ignores me. He just does not know how to treasure me. Completely hopeless for him. And I have never yearned so much for someone in my life. Can this feeling thing be reliable? Is this feeling thing tricking me? Has anyone be cheated by their feelings?
Do I stay friends with him after dumping him? Or choose to stay friends after I recover? I feel so stupid having spent so much energy on him while he is taking so easy with his life.