Am I crazy?

[7th samurai]

or maybe she felt insecure after the break up, and thought that if she does everything that guys asks maybe he'll stick around.

just a thought :S

[ammi00]

I don't think she did it out of insecurity. I'm pretty sure she did it because she suddenly discovered a new & exciting lover, which made her wanting to try new things. OP, you said it - you were selfish as a lover, you didn't put effort into your sexual life - so how were you expecting her to be satisfied? I think you were, and still are, super-insecure. Maybe she told you what she's done with the other guy out of "revenge". I think you should put an end to this relationship, because it will only fuel your insecurities; learn from your mistakes & then find someone else.

[HeartIsAching]

Wow this resignates with me a lot, because, i was an EXTREMELY selfish lover. And i guess its because during the first half our relationship (prior to break up) i was not very generous to her sexually, now i am changing that. Its funny because she said alsmost EXACTLY what you just said to me. I just didnt know if she was being honest or not.

Thank you SOO much for this advice

Yeah... that's a major ****up. Being a generous lover is it's own reward. Trust me, women will do damn near anything for a man whose focus is on making them feel good... and what we get out of the deal is a lover that brags on you to her girlfriends... who does shit just because she likes to make YOU feel good too.

It's also (for me) very erotically stimulating. Going down on my woman gives me a hell of an erection. Gets me going to get her off.

[baicon11]

I am getting so much good advice here. I am realizing a few things

1. All of this is essentially my fault, i broke up with her she did her thing, now i am punishing her for it. (completely unfair of me)

2. I was selfish during our previous sexual relationship and that was the reason we never got to that level she did with him.

3. This all stems from my personal insecurities, because, i just found out that they also did some "anal exploration" which is also a first with him, and that just made me go coo coo for coco puffs. I need to stop asking questions grow up be a man and just deal with it.


Did i just give myself advice? wow i feel stupid lol

[girl68]

You'd better not ask another question about her sexual experiences- EVER AGAIN.

[Take2]

Yeah, and you can't solve this by asking her for what you want, either. Once you have established yourself as a selfish lover, demands or pleas or requests for behavior need to be the furthest thing from your mind. Work on being so amazing that she offers you the things she knows you would like sexually.

Sure, in a fresh relationship, in an idel relationship, communication and asking for what you want is the very best policy. But having wrecked that by asking for more than you gave...you have to repair the damage over time. If you can't handle that, you will have to find someone else and start fresh.

[sweetkissesforu]

What was the purpose of her telling you your gf seems rather immature she needed to tell you of other guy but not the details thats immature

[sweetkissesforu]

Yeah, and you can't solve this by asking her for what you want, either. Once you have established yourself as a selfish lover, demands or pleas or requests for behavior need to be the furthest thing from your mind. Work on being so amazing that she offers you the things she knows you would like sexually.

Sure, in a fresh relationship, in an idel relationship, communication and asking for what you want is the very best policy. But having wrecked that by asking for more than you gave...you have to repair the damage over time. If you can't handle that, you will have to find someone else and start fresh.

to give is to get in return two way street

[ashley89]

Hi

That is another issue, few nights ago we were intimate and at the point of climax i asked her if i could do it, and she said no and that she wants me to cum inside her.

*at this moment I really got annoyed*

Not b/c i am dying to cum in her mouth, but, once again i started comparing (why him its ok and not me). She also once told me that me and her have the convenience of cumming inside b/c shes on the pill and we been together for so long, but, he never came inside her so i guess it was in the mouth?? although i know mouth is not the default place to cum when your pulling out.

So ya, the No really annoyed me and thats actually what sparked all this jealousy in my mind.

yeah I understand where you are coming from (no pun intended - LOL!) I read some of the other responses - maybe over time if you are less selfish and you two work on things, you will get to the point where she will let you come in her mouth. it may just take awhile and if it happens it happens! if not, you can either continue to work on it and remain patient or try being with someone else

[xxazurexx]

I think you're interpreting our words poorly. I was *never forced* to do anything. He made me *want to* engage in other things... I think that's what the first poster meant.

I did more with my first bf, than I ever did with any of them. I was never forced either.

I was just totally and utterly hooked on him and there was a very strong sexual attraction with him, than I ever felt with any other guy.

Nothing to do with who was more selfish and who wasn't....it was who I was more attracted too, that I did the most with.