Guy treating me like s***t

[KatieOhio]

So this is a collegue of mine, lets call him A, who is acting weeeeird. Known him for 2 yrs. Very short history with him. Couple of drunken one-night stands. Thats about it.
I am currently involved with his best friend, B. They live together. We all work together.

This has actually worked out fine. Until now. Lately, A has been calling me all sorts of synonyms to the word prostitute. When he is drunk he sends me nasty texts, and comes on real strong. I always reject him. Even if it involves him standing in my hallway trying to force himself through my front door. He is constantly hasseling me and B, including interupting us in bed, and making fun of us/trashing the relationship. He is very preoccupied with B and me.

I heard he also trashes me behind my back as well. Often, he tries to put me out of play, by questioning my abilities to perform at work. The weirdest thing is, that A sometimes is very nice to me..

I told him firmly to stop calling me names, and informed him that we would never have sex again. That didn`t work..

Before, I just ignored him.. But it is starting to get to me. Its also taking a toll on A and Bs friendship.

What is the deal? What should I do?

[blackman]

poo on his face?????

[KatieOhio]

Haha. Ill eat a kebab first!

[tehwarlock]

[url=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CNrqiQymDTA&feature=related]YouTube - Stomp Em In The Nuts[/url]

[xxazurexx]

Thump him in the mouth

Nah, best way to deal with this type, is to totally ignore it's existence.

[Gratedwasabi]

Ignore him. Refuse invitations to go places where he'll be and if your BF asks why, just tell him so and so is mean to you and you're not going to put yourself in a position to be abused, mentally or otherwise. Bet you anything when you stop going to your BFs house he straightens out his friend for you. Fast. A guy won't go out of his way to call out his friend, but if it endangers his flow of.. umm.. sexy time, it happens really quickly. Think an alpha wolf dealing with a pack member trying to overthrow him; tear that dude APART. :p

[Lovable]

I would agree with what grated said already.

The best thing is to ignore him, bullys feed off of the attention they get from the people they are bullying. If you do your best to ignore him, I bet he will eventually stop. I know it's easier said than done sometimes, but it is effective when dealing with a bullying type like this jerk.

[johnfisher]

The route cause of this whole problem seems to be one girl who has slept with 2 mates. I'm not saying his treatment of you is right or wrong, but often when a girl goes out with a guy's best mate he's mad at the mate, he seems to be mad at you which is strange. Either way I'm not surprised you've ended up in this mess, perhaps next time you'll be more careful in who you get involved with?

[gigigi4]

The route cause of this whole problem seems to be one girl who has slept with 2 mates. I'm not saying his treatment of you is right or wrong, but often when a girl goes out with a guy's best mate he's mad at the mate, he seems to be mad at you which is strange. Either way I'm not surprised you've ended up in this mess, perhaps next time you'll be more careful in who you get involved with?

I disagree. The root cause of his behavior is he's an asshole. Being mad at you/his friend is one thing, but his behavior is aggressive and scary. I'm actually surprised your BF is still friends with him given the extent of his harrassment of you- have you told your BF about his showing up at your place and trying to force his way in??

[Nice Lover Boy]

Umm....is this the same dude from you last post?

[MrMusics]

So this is a collegue of mine, lets call him A, who is acting weeeeird. Known him for 2 yrs. Very short history with him. Couple of drunken one-night stands. Thats about it.
I am currently involved with his best friend, B. They live together. We all work together.

This has actually worked out fine. Until now. Lately, A has been calling me all sorts of synonyms to the word prostitute. When he is drunk he sends me nasty texts, and comes on real strong. I always reject him. Even if it involves him standing in my hallway trying to force himself through my front door. He is constantly hasseling me and B, including interupting us in bed, and making fun of us/trashing the relationship. He is very preoccupied with B and me.

I heard he also trashes me behind my back as well. Often, he tries to put me out of play, by questioning my abilities to perform at work. The weirdest thing is, that A sometimes is very nice to me..

I told him firmly to stop calling me names, and informed him that we would never have sex again. That didn`t work..

Before, I just ignored him.. But it is starting to get to me. Its also taking a toll on A and Bs friendship.

What is the deal? What should I do?

If he's bullying you at work you should take it higher. Not sure how much the laws at work differ between the US and UK, but don't just ignore it, do something.

[MrBojangles]

So you bang this guy on the casual tip. Then you start banging his best friend/friend. Sometimes I wonder how thick girls glasses are sometimes.

Start thinking about the consequences of your actions, stop being so delusional.

I mean sure hes immature/lame for doing what he does but I'm not really raging on him to be honest. I just dont get this when it comes to girls. They will do stupid shit and when it comes back in their face they go "omg whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat".

[nims]

I'm not putting 100% of the blame on you, but you sure made a mess here. I agree with both gigigi4 and MrBojangles.

A trashing you behind your back, probably not that unusual, to an extent. But the name calling, texts, and physical aggression worries me. You can try ignoring him and blocking his number, but keep a watchful eye on the situation. The guy is obviously an asshole, but if he is unwell, it could get worse.

So you had a one night stand with a coworker, mistake one. You repeated this mistake one or a few more times. Then you start seeing his friend B and start sleeping with him. Mistake two--or three or four. Oh not to mention they are roommates?! What were you thinking?? All bad choices, no wonder things have gone bad.

Do you see yourself marrying B? no, no forget I asked, it doesn't matter. My advice is end things with B and stop socializing with both A and B. Maybe if you are lucky it won't affect your job too much and you will at least still have that.

[VincenzoG91]

This is kind of a gray area. I'm not sure exactly how many people from work you can sleep with before the term prostitute starts to seem reasonable. Aren't there any guys in your town that work for other companies?

[Raze]

Hmmmmm.. Well, I do believe it's partially your fault for getting drunk and having all these one night stands with the guy. Way to send mixed messages. I'm going to say that the issue is you. Stop getting drunk and having one night stands.